Are we the assholes for keeping our newborn daughter away from my girlfriend’s entire family?

A couple is facing intense pressure from the girlfriend’s toxic family to allow her estranged mother to meet their newborn daughter. After years of emotional abuse from the mother, the couple decided to cut her off, but the family continues to push for a reconciliation.

Despite their efforts to protect their daughter and maintain boundaries, the boyfriend is feeling conflicted about isolating his girlfriend from her entire family. He’s concerned about the long-term impact on their relationship and whether they’re making the right decision. Read the original story below…

‘ Are we the assholes for keeping our newborn daughter away from my girlfriend’s entire family?’

My girlfriend (M) and I have been together for nearly 10 years. Throughout our relationship, her mother has been a constant source of toxicity, but it reached a breaking point when we decided to start a family. M struggled with infertility and required medication to conceive.

Her mother knew about this and, instead of offering support, called M one day, yelling at her that she would never be a mother and mocking her for even trying. That phone call pushed M to the edge, and she broke down in tears.

We decided to cut her mother out of our lives, especially since M was pregnant, though no one knew except us. Despite this, her family kept pressuring us to mend things with her mother, but she made no real effort to make amends, offering only a half-hearted “apology” at a family event.

When our daughter was born by emergency C-section, her family immediately started demanding that M’s mother be allowed to meet the baby. They gave us no time to process the birth or allow M to recover. Fast forward to now, our daughter is three weeks old, and we’re still dealing with M’s family trying to force her mother into our lives.

Recently, I went to M’s grandfather’s shop to fix our car, and once again, her family tried to pressure me into letting M’s mother see our daughter. Despite my efforts to stand my ground and explain why it wasn’t happening, they wouldn’t listen.

M’s grandfather kicked me out of his house, and M’s mother twisted the situation, telling people I had “challenged her to a fight,” when all I did was offer to continue the conversation outside. In the aftermath, M blocked every family member who wouldn’t respect our boundaries.

On one hand, I know it’s necessary to protect our daughter and ourselves from the toxicity, but on the other hand, I feel terrible for isolating M from her entire family. I’m worried she might regret it later and resent both me and our daughter. I just need some outside perspective on this situation.

Check out how the community responded:

PeopleShouldBeBetter −  They consistently don’t respect your choices and it’s not at all unreasonable to go non contact. Sometimes, we have to choose our family vs the ones we were born into. Wanting the best for your child is absolutely what a parent should do. Congrats!

Ok-Control-787 −  NTA but I can’t help but feel that she’s going to regret that choice one day and resent both myself and our daughter. Not if she’s at all a reasonable person she won’t.

Robica1123 −  Wow, looks like M’s mom won the “Worst Mother-in-Law Award” in record time. But seriously, it sounds like you and M are making the right decision in protecting your daughter and yourselves from her toxic behavior.

And who knows, maybe M’s family will eventually come to their senses and see that. But for now, enjoy your new family of three and don’t let the haters bring you down!

Available-Fail-8090 −  It seems your gf is doing what’s best for her mental health. They’re gonna spin whatever they need to, to not look like the assholes they are. Block em all too and bond with your new family with no regrets.. NTA

beet3637 −  Move away if you can and don’t tell them where.

desiirexxrosy −  Protecting your kid from toxic people isn’t “isolating,” it’s called being a good parent. Her family isn’t trying to make things right, they just want control. Stay strong. NTA

Honest_Weird_9715 −  Hell no. Your girlfriend is better of without that family. Family isn’t always blood. She has you and her daughter. Protect both from this vile people.

canthinkofnamelol −  Well, at least your baby won’t have to deal with any annoying relatives at family gatherings. Silver lining?

Perfect_Ring3489 −  Nta. Cut the toxic people out. That is an innocent baby who doesnt deserve to be exposed to such animosity.

silvergiltsky −  Those people are BATSHIT CRAZY. They are dangerous. You and your wife and your child are all endangered by them. There is NO choice here. They are and must remain history. There is truly no hope for them. Cut them off permanently. Find peace. Be safe.