AITA FOR GETTING READY TO EVICT MY SON. ?

One Reddit user is grappling with a tough decision regarding her 26-year-old son, who has been living at home while working full-time. After previously contributing $300 a month, he has become upset about the unequal payment expectations compared to his younger sister, who is earning less and sometimes gets a pass on her payments.

Frustrated by her son’s lack of communication and respect, she is considering legal eviction as a final resort. Read below to see how the situation escalated and whether she’s in the right to take such drastic measures.

‘ AITA FOR GETTING READY TO EVICT MY SON. ?’

AITA for getting ready to evict my 26 year old son? He’s literally 26 years old works full time plus overtime, makes 27 dollars an hour and doesn’t want to give me 300 dollars a month to stay at home. He was giving it but he’s mad because I let his younger sister, who makes way less slide with her payment at times.

I have asked him repeatedly is he paying or moving and he just ignores my text at this point. Now I feel disrespected like he’s saying it’s his way and I can go to hell. So I asked one more time today and if no response I am going to file for a legal eviction. So on top of him not paying, I have to pay who knows how much to remove him. I’m sooo mad!

Here’s how people reacted to the post:

TeenyNewman −  NTA. Your son is an adult; it’s time for him to shoulder adult responsibilities, and that includes feeding, clothing and housing one’s self. It’s time for him to go out in the real world and discover exactly how much he can rent for $300 per month.

You’re letting his sister’s rent slide sometimes? Not his business, and not pertinent to your arrangement with him. Adults know this. Be aware that if you go through with the eviction, it will cause a rift between you and your son that he might never be willing to repair. He sounds quite e**itled, but being a parent does not mean that you should forever ease his way through life. (Just the opposite, in fact.)

Just_keep_swimming87 −  NTA but evictions stay on your record and can make it hard to get another apartment. Regardless of how much someone makes, landlords will see an eviction and refuse to rent to a person based on that alone. Maybe see if he’s willing to voluntarily move first.

HorseygirlWH −  Does he buy his own groceries? If not, $300 wouldn’t even cover the cost of his food! You should look up fair market value of a one bedroom space and tell him that is what you will charge, going forward. Don’t let him know you are sliding on sister’s rent.

Write up a letter and sign it and hand it to him without a formal eviction notice and tell him if he doesn’t pay rent by X date you will go to a lawyer. I’m 61F and we had two kids and let them live home right out of college for a year or two to save money. Then they moved out. At 26, he should be paying more than just $300! You’re NTA.

Guilty_Storage_9652 −  If he is making 27 an hour and can’t pay you 300 a month that’s a leech.

RecommendationOld525 −  I know this is probably an unpopular opinion but I broadly say YTA. Children live with their parents into adulthood, and I believe they should not be asked to pay rent unless their living there affects the amount of the mortgage or the rent that the parents are paying (e.g. the parents *would* downsize but are staying in a larger home, the parents *would* rent out part of the home but are allowing the child to live there instead).

The amount of times this question comes up on this subreddit with so many NTA rulings makes me think about how f**king generous my parents were to *allow* me to move back in with them for almost a year after I graduated college without asking me to pay for anything.

But then again, why would they have? I cost them *less* money than I had before (since they paid part of my college tuition) and I simply took up a room in the house they already were paying to own. I cleaned up after myself and pitched in with chores as I always had and had been taught to do growing up.

I do think it’s worthwhile for children to pitch in in some ways. For example, regarding bills they contribute to, such as coming up with an agreement that they will pay for a percent of the electricity bill each month or for paying for groceries. But those are the types of agreements that should be negotiated between parents and children and revisited.

The main reason I call OP TA is that I don’t know why they need the money from their son other than that they are expecting it as a form of respect. Is it just passive income or is the $300 covering for expenses that the son is incurring by staying home?

The secondary reason I call OP TA is that, as a parent, I imagine a major priority (based on my own relationship with my parents) is helping your child succeed. Is paying that $300 every month helping your son save up to get his own home? Are you trying to teach your son responsibility (…now at 26 and not when he was younger)?

OP and other parents who demand rent from their adult children are allowed to do whatever they want, but I just don’t see how it is beneficial to ask your child to pay for something you already have to offer. Congratulations on some additional passive income?

FTR, I let a friend stay with me rent-free for months when I first started living on my own. She didn’t take up space I didn’t already have, and she bought her own groceries and cleaned up after herself.

She was a great houseguest and we had no real issues, especially since we were both working a fair amount of time. I’ve let other friends stay with me for short periods of time because it’s the kind thing to do, and I’d do the same thing again if I had a loved one in need.

Zestyclose-Bag9975 −  $27 an hour? Assuming he’s full-time, that’s more than $50,000 a year. Part-time, it’s more than $25,000. Lord, evict him. You’ll be doing him a favor.

bellaboo001 −  no, he’s pushing 30 making more money than most people. he can either afford a good apartment or pay you rent. if your daughter who is younger and makes less money can pay rent when she has the money why can’t he pay? 300$ a month is cheap, you’re doing him a favor by letting him stay but he’s not giving anything in return except teenager level disrespect.

Proud-Canary-2269 −  how old is this daughter? the amount they make doesn’t matter, you aren’t an income based landlord. if she is older than 20 she should be held by the same standards he is.

xstevenx81 −  NTA – for setting fair boundaries that you both agreed to. YTA – because this sounds like you’re turning to scorched earth here. If you go to these lengths then there is a very good chance you are going to end your relationship with your son or at least damage it in a very major way.

Unless there is no other option to get your point across without evicting him; you are going too far. It’s not in the original post but I would at least tell him how you feel (by the way do not take cheap shots or attribute intention to his actions, just state your position and keep to the facts). I.e.- I feel that I have laid out very fair expectations with you.

You are not fulfilling your part of the deal. If you are going to live in my house then you will…(skip this if you see no way to work this out.) pay rent, pay back rent, be responsive to my texts and stop worrying about your sister. If this is not agreeable then you will need to be moved out by x date.

I will be strictly enforcing this and will file an eviction if you do not leave on your own accord. I love you and want the best for you, but we have reached a point where I feel disrespected and taken advantage of and need you to accept that or leave.

ttothebiddy −  NTA – This is a grown ass man. Sounds like you’ve given him too much for too long. Give an inch, they’ll take a mile. Tough love now or your son will never be a proper adult. If you died tomorrow real life would come at him reallllll fast.

As for the folks commenting on your daughter. Well, sounds like similar lessons are needed for her. BUT what business is it of your son’s to know what your daughter is paying for rent? If you’re the landlord, you can charge what you want. If they don’t like it… They can leave. Not stop paying. Do you folks knock on your neighbors doors asking what they pay for rent?

Three adults, two of them taking advantage of the other. The only way you have been an a-hole is not standing up for yourself, and therefore not teaching your children how to be proper adults. Be strong, if they are decent people.in the long run they will respect you. Especially after having kids. The number of times I’ve told my parents “sorry” and that I “appreciate them” after having kids is astounding.

Is the mother justified in her frustration and potential decision to evict her son, or is she being unreasonable given the family dynamics? How would you handle a similar situation with adult children living at home? Share your thoughts below!