WIBTA if I reported my daughter’s teacher for not pronouncing her name correctly?

A Redditor seeks advice on whether they would be wrong to report their daughter’s teacher for not pronouncing her name correctly. The Redditor’s daughter, Kanae, who has a Japanese name, asked her English teacher to pronounce her name as “Kaa-Naa-EH,” but the teacher, an American expat, insisted on calling her “Kah-Nye.”

Despite Kanae’s polite corrections, the teacher continued to mispronounce it. The Redditor, feeling frustrated and concerned for their daughter’s well-being, is considering reporting the teacher to the school. However, they’re wondering if this would be an overreaction, especially since their daughter is shy and didn’t want to make a fuss. Read the original story below for more context on this ongoing situation.

‘ WIBTA if I reported my daughter’s teacher for not pronouncing her name correctly?’

My daughter’s English teacher refuses to pronounce her name correctly. She has a Japanese name and we live in Japan. Her name is Kanae, pronounced Kaa-Naa-EH. Recently, Kanae told me that her English teacher(an expat from America) at school calls her “Kah-Nye”. She told me that she told the teacher “My name Kanae. It’s three claps (syllables)”. But the English teacher told Kanae that she was incorrect, and that grammatically speaking that she , her teacher, was correct.

During my daughters sports day I “confronted” the teacher . I explained that my daughter would like the be called “Kaa-naa-eh”. But she laughed and said she was pronouncing it the way it’s “supposed to be” but will try her best to remember.

Today, my daughter told me the teacher still calls her Kah-Nye. My daughter is very very shy and it took a lot for her to correct her teacher the first time. I’m considering going to the school in the morning. But is that an over reaction?

(For some clarity; I am not Japanese, my wife is so our kids are mixed-race. Our kids are fluent in English and Japanese. ). 🧚🏿‍♂️🧚🏿‍♂️. 👉🏽Not like Kanye West But Kah. Plus Nye like Bill Nye 👈🏼
:::::oh wow! I wrote this late at night and went to sleep. I didn’t expect it to get this much attention! Thank you for all of the responses. I can’t reply to them all.

But this morning we couldn’t go(son had an earache) but we are going there after school ends. We asked our daughter if she wanted us to tell. She said that she didn’t care. We don’t want the teacher fired, we just want our daughter respected in her classroom::. ⛩⛩

Update: I’m not sure where else to place it::: But my wife and I went to the school today around 3:45pm. By then the English teacher in question had gone home. We told the principal everything that I’ve told you all and he was extremely apologetic. He did say that maybe it was a language barrier. But I reminded him that my daughter and I both told the teacher in English how to pronounce Kanae.

So then the principal called her dispatch company (Interac it turns out). The same thing happened. The company apologized but tried to pass it off as a language barrier thing. More apologizes were issued when we told them. we spoke English. We were told that interac would speak to the teacher, and that they would handle it.

They principal asked us to come to the school Monday morning. I’m hoping to talk to the teacher face to face on that day. ❤️💚Final (maybe) update. This morning I met with the school board, principal, the dispatch company, and the teacher in question! I honestly didn’t expect everyone there.

It was very traditional Japanese apology. Deep bows from everyone (even the American teacher). She wrote (I think it was written for her because it didn’t sound natural and she made several mistakes) I don’t remember it word for word but it said “ I sincerely apologize to the (our family name) and most sincerely to Kanae(she said it correctly). I now realize how important names are to the Japanese people.

Please accept my dearest condolences(yes this was actually said).” The teacher promised to treat Kanae with more respect. She also apologized for not respecting me during the sports day. Honestly the only “real” thing that she said is when Kanae was brought in and the teacher kneeled down and said “Kanae.

I am really sorry”.. It seemed heartfelt Kanae being Kanae made the teacher a card I forgive her. So does my daughter. I have no idea what is going to happen career wise however. Her company seemed very very upset.. But my daughter feels better. Thank you all so much

Here’s what the community had to contribute:

FlyingGingerMonkee −  NTA; you’d be helping your child face an adult who clearly entitled enough to think she can do no wrong. I had a math teacher who did this exact thing and I went from doing okay in math the previous year to flunking it because I didn’t respect the teacher and refused to listen to what he was saying when he called me the wrong name. 15 years later and I’m still angry about it.

almafinklebottom −  What I’d do: I’d scheduled an official one-on-one with you, your spouse and the teacher specifically to address this issue. If she still does after that then escalate to her boss. Let her know your plan but try to approach it in an open and friendly way. NTA and WNBTA

stillpretending13 −  NTA. That’s ridiculous. Mispronouncing once is one thing, continuing to do so and refusing to be told otherwise makes her a d**k.

fuckoffimreading −  NTA that teacher sounds kinda r**ist

PowerfulYet −  NTA. I’m a teacher. Even if she was right about how it’s supposed to be pronounced (and she’s not), if both the student and the parent have told her that it’s not they way to pronounce the name, she should have backed off. She should have backed off the first time your daughter told her the right way to pronounce it. Names are an important part of our identities and, as teachers, we should be respecting that AND encouraging our students to stand up for themselves when others don’t.

[Reddit User] −  Bruh ask her to watch demon slayer anime in dub lol. That’ll do the job 🙂

[Reddit User] −  My son’s teacher has called a classmate Gazelle since school started. Her name is Giselle. Not a gazelle.

Throwaway41790a −  NTA. This teacher is kind of rude.

Virmyth −  I was going to tell you that you might want to talk to her before reporting, but it’s clear this isn’t a misunderstanding. I think it’s not a big deal, or it wouldn’t be if this was between adults, but there’s a child involved and she deserves respect.. NTA.

Do you think the Redditor is overreacting, or is it important for the teacher to respect their daughter’s name and pronunciation? How would you handle a situation where your child’s name is repeatedly mispronounced despite efforts to correct it? Share your thoughts below!