WIBTA if I asked my friend to stop packing my food so she can eat it herself?

A Redditor is feeling frustrated with a friend who consistently takes home food they’ve cooked together, despite the Redditor being the one to pay for the groceries. While the Redditor is fine with their friend enjoying the meals when she visits, the practice of packing leftovers to take home feels unfair.

Is it unreasonable to ask her friend to stop taking the food, or is there a better way to approach this situation? Read the original story below to explore the dynamics of shared meals and the challenges of setting boundaries with friends.

‘ WIBTA if I asked my friend to stop packing my food so she can eat it herself?’

So me and my friend cook food together like weekly but the thing is she doesn’t pay for the groceries for it I do. Obviously I don’t mind if she eats when ever she comes over or something but I’m just annoyed that she takes that food home with her.

So yeah WIBTA if I asked her to stop bringing the food home with her?

Here’s the input from the Reddit crowd:

Peony-Pony −  NTA The diplomatic way to handle the situation is to tell her you enjoy cooking with them but you’ve noticed they’ve been taking leftovers you were planning to eat home. If they’d like to split the cost of the food you prepare together, we can make a larger batch and we’ll both have enough leftovers for another meal. I find it’s easiest to deal with moochers with gravitas.

KittikatB −  NTA. Alternate who buys the ingredients, and the leftovers stay with whoever paid.

berngherlier −  NTA suggest alternating whose house to cook at. Ensure your expectation is that 1. you just turn up at hers, and she’ll have all the groceries for the meal 2. you go home with your share of leftovers as well

Digitaldakini −  Have you asked your friend if she is food insecure or possibly helping someone else who is?

Karabaja007 −  So, she comes to your home, you cook together, eat and then she goes into kitchen and just packs everything to bring with her? I have an idea which can be passive aggressive but I think it is justified in this case.

You serve everything and then after the meal just beat her to it; pack everything in containers and put into your fridge. If you see she wants to take them( entitlement!), tell her, sorry girl, I need those for later, I am planning to eat it for dinner.

Since she is not buying groceries, she doesn’t have a leg on to stand in this situation. However, please make sure your friend has food to eat and that she is not poor and thats not her only proper meal… (I assume you would know if she is food secure).

zerenato76 −  Hang on now.
You buy. You two cook together. You eat. And then she takes home the leftovers? Based on what arrangement?. INFO.

ratkingdad −  NTA but honestly it doesn’t need to be a huge thing. You can probably just ask her nicely to stop and even like, give an excuse that you want it for lunch that week and most rational people will understand.

AnnaliseUnderground −  Your friend sounds like a total mooch and she’s taking advantage. I’d put the breaks on that. Or ask her if she could get the groceries/ingredients for the next session. If you’re feeling used, that is a problem. In my experience those cheap friends who have no problems taking advantage of you are usually very petty.

If you think she’ll listen with maturity and offer to make it right, talk to her. (If you’re friends that’s how she SHOULD behave.) If you think she’ll twist this around and act like an AH, just start telling her you’re busy that night or ask if she can pick up some of the things on the list.

If you work in a profession where you make 150k a year and she makes 1/2 that or less, perhaps on the weeks she picks up the tab for ingredients you suggests more budget-friendly meals.

LetChaosRaine −  Info. There’s definitely missing context here. Are you cooking one meal with some leftovers or food for like a week? Is she taking all of the food home? Do you always eat a plate together after cooking? How did you come to this arrangement of cooking together in the first place? Are you cooking at your house?

Honestly even more than that because I think most people are assuming that you’re inviting her over, cooking once a week on your pans with your food, eating a plate each, and then she takes home all the leftovers without asking, and yeah if that’s true that’s pretty unreasonable on her part.

koffienl −  NTA. Suggest to rotating the location so next week you will be cooking at here place and she will provide the groceries.