[UPDATE] My husband (33M) refuses to spend time with me (26F) or our son (1 month)
An update from a Reddit user (26F) shows how a small push can lead to big changes. After struggling with her husband’s (33M) lack of involvement with their newborn, she took advice to leave their baby in his care while she attended a job interview. This experience sparked a remarkable transformation in her husband’s attitude toward parenting. Read the heartwarming update below:
For those who want to read the previous part: https://aita.pics/BbqvB
‘ [UPDATE] My husband (33M) refuses to spend time with me (26F) or our son (1 month)’
Thank you guys so much for your advice! Monday he was off and I had a job interview anyway, so I left my son with him. He seemed very anxious as I was leaving, but I just told him he would do fine and if something drastic happened to call me. After my interview (which went very well, on a side note ) I called to check on him.
He was laughing and telling me about the funny faces our baby was making! I told him since he had it under control I was going to run some errands while I was out. Long story short, I was gone for about 4 hours, and when I came home he was happy and cuddling the baby on the couch.
It totally transformed him! He even took the baby with him to run errands on Tuesday by himself and gave me a couple of hours home alone! He is helpful and playful with the baby and it just makes my heart sing! Thank you again for your advice and encouragement!
Here’s the input from the Reddit crowd:
[Reddit User] − This is really sweet to read. It sounds like your husband was really just afraid when the baby came and everything was suddenly “real,” but it seems like he’s taken to his role and that’s great!
DCharlieW − Great to here. My son is 11 months old and it took some time for me to bond with him at first. Now we are best friends!
45MinutesOfRoadHead − Good! Sometimes it takes a bit for the men to warm up. We have a 4 month old and my SO didn’t really start bonding with him until he was 6 weeks old. Little babies need their moms more during those early stages and the men tend to feel useless. Plus, the baby just kinda lays there. Once our son started smiling and interacting more my SO was smitten. They’re big pals now and play constantly.
antioch75 − I had the same problem. I swear it is a first time dad thing. My wife did exactly the same, left me with our daughter and said have fun. I had a blast, I was so stupidly scared of hurting her or her being hurt before that.. Glad everything worked out.
trollboogies − How about the sleeping situation? That’s wonderful he’s more attentive to the baby, but what about you?
[Reddit User] − We did it Reddit!
iiiinthecomputer − I think one thing more people need to realise is that kids bounce. Literally, if necessary. In other words, for all that they’re needy little attempted-suicide-machines, babies and toddlers are resilient and tough. Knowing some basic rules like not leaving them unattended on a change table, not leaving them unattended near water, etc, is important.
Beyond that… you’re pretty OK. Especially if you keep in mind that the kid is trying to communicate with you and help you meet its needs. I think a lot of people are terrified of breaking the baby somehow, and can’t get over that part. I felt a bit like that before I had my son. Now … yes, I am walking down the street holding him by his ankles while he bounces against my back and giggles, why do you ask?
GrizFyrFyter1 − All of my buddies that were father’s before me (all have girls… Weird) told me they didn’t really have any connection or bonding with their first kid until it was 6+ months old. I don’t know what’s wrong with them. I immediately connected with my daughter. I still cherish every day she wants to lay on the couch and watch Princess movies and she turned 4 yesterday.
cats_just_in_space − This makes me really happy to read
ItWasYourOtherEar − good
Sometimes, the opportunity to bond can reveal a parent’s natural instincts and love. This heartwarming change shows how moments of responsibility can help a family grow stronger together. What are your thoughts on this positive shift? Share below!