UPDATE: Me [60 M] with my daughter [19 F], she hasn’t had a single friend since middle school and I am starting to get worried
A concerned father shared his worries about his 19-year-old daughter, Mia, who hadn’t had friends since middle school. In a heartwarming update, Mia focused on self-improvement, pursued her passion for film by enrolling in a specialized school, and quickly found friends who shared her interests. Read on for this uplifting story of personal growth and connection.
‘ UPDATE: Me [60 M] with my daughter [19 F], she hasn’t had a single friend since middle school and I am starting to get worried’
My apologies in advance, this got much longer than I anticipated..
I debated for a while on whether or not I should post an update. On one hand, I don’t want to violate my daughter’s privacy and trust, but on the other hand, I received countless comments and messages from people telling me how they related to my Mia’s situation and wanted nearly as badly as I did for her to find happiness.
In the end I decided that while I am not going to tell Mia about this post, I think she would be okay with me sharing vague details in order to benefit other people like her. Soon after I made my post, I visited Mia and she told me about something she and her therapist had been discussing.
Mia said that if she was going to be alone, even if it was just for a little bit longer, she at least wanted be happy with herself. (I think she worded it as saying that was the person she was hanging out with the most, so she needed to like them). So instead of pursuing friends for the time being, she was going to make herself happy.
We made a couple appointments for superficial things, she got her teeth whitened and her hair dyed. She also bought some new camera gadgets so she could start practicing photography.
Then came the really big decision. She told me she wanted to start taking classes at a different college (film school). I don’t know why it never occurred to me but it seems like a natural choice given her love for film.
We were only a few months away from when this school’s semester started, but because they were small and somewhat under the radar they were very accommodating towards us and I managed to enroll Mia in 3 classes for the fall semester. I was very stressed during this time, but it ended up being worth it.
Anyway, Mia started school and is absolutely loving it. The best part, and the reason I am making this post, is because she instantly attracted a bunch of new friends! Mia is very shy so I can tell she’s a little o**rwhelmed by all of this attention all of the sudden, but she is obviously very happy. Instead of teary skype calls she now gushes to me about how her day is going.
You guys were all right. She just needed to find a common interest to meet new people and make friends, and that interest turned out to be movies. I hope this helps those of you who messaged me, and I also hope you now know that even if you think you will be alone forever, don’t give up! Maybe you just haven’t met the right people yet..
**tl;dr**: Mia has friends now!
Let’s dive into the reactions from Reddit:
missinfidel − Mia has a new haircut and friends at her new film school, that nice boy successfully asked out the cute deaf girl in sign language, this is just a really great night for me.
[Reddit User] − Aw this makes me so happy! You sound like an awesome Dad for doing your part in helping her out 🙂
HideoMikaou − I read the previous post about this, and now the update… I’ll admit, this update actually made me a little teary. Good job OP, you sound like an awesome dad =)
remuliini − Excellent news! We had a bit similar situation when it was the time to pick up upper secondary school. She didn’t have much in common with her class mates and all her friends were in another school and they got to meet quite rarely.
She has always had interest in drawing and painting, and we encouraged her to apply for a school with art program. She passed the entrance exams and got accepted. Her new classmates are all of artistic type and they understand each other way better. She’s got new friends as well and school is great again. I’m glad your daughter was able to find interesting subjects and new friends also.
Suaded83 − This post is the best. You’re a great father.
iminlovewithacoco − I remember your post! I’m so glad it all worked out well. Good luck to your daughter in her new school 🙂
workaccountforpcstuf − This is the sweetest update ever.
jodes − Good on you, OP, even if she doesn’t make a career in film, she’ll get her confidence up, build friendships and that will help her get through life.
abandoningeden − awww I never saw this post, but I similarly had very few/no friends for most of my childhood and totally blossomed in college. Actually maybe the reason I’m a college professor now….cause when I got to academia and I met people with my same interests I was like “OMG these are my people!!” and I never left. 🙂
[Reddit User] − I just want to say that this is great but stay vigilant. She may struggle when things get hard because if various life dramas that occur in all friendships which she has very limited experience with. A situation where she is stuck in the middle if two fighting friends, for example, is harder to deal with as an adult if it didnt happen to you several times in high school.
Mia’s journey reminds us that finding the right environment and community can make all the difference. Have you ever discovered new friendships or happiness through a passion? Share your story below and inspire others!