UPDATE AITA for taking a 3 hour nap every day and expecting my husband to look after the kids and only wake me up for emergencies?

A Reddit user shared an update on their situation after deciding to leave their husband. The user had been in an unhealthy relationship and, after gathering evidence, decided to file for divorce. They secretly packed up with their kids and went to stay with their parents, where they feel safer and more supported.

The user has already spoken to a lawyer and expects to get full custody of the children, as the soon-to-be ex-husband has not shown much interest in fighting for custody. The user is now finding some peace and rest, with the kids adjusting well to their new living situation.

‘ UPDATE AITA for taking a 3 hour nap every day and expecting my husband to look after the kids and only wake me up for emergencies?’

It’s been a while since I last posted but a lot has happened so I figured I should update you. Making this post has been an eye opener for me and I decided there and then that I was done. So thanks to everyone who told me what I desperately needed to hear. I started gathering evidence which would allow me to leave relatively savely.

After I had enough evidence I prepared to leave. I gathered all documents and secretly packed up some stuff for the kids and myself. I informed my parents and my brother about the situation. My parents immediately turned my brother’s old room into the new kids room and my old room has never stopped being mine.

I waited for my husband to be gone and then my brother picked us all up. I left a message for my husband explaining that I wasn’t coming back and that I’d be filing for divorce. I also told him about all the evidence so he wouldn’t do anything stupid. I’ve been at my parents’ for nearly a week now.

We have a carer who stays here 3 nights a week and I share the other 4 nights with both my parents. My dad is retired so he looks after the kids for a good portion of the day. I have talked to a lawyer and she said I will likely get full custody. My soon to be ex has left some n**ty messages but hasn’t shown up so I feel relatively safe.

I don’t think he will fight for custody since he was always disappointed that our daughter wasn’t a son and our son isn’t the strong little boy that he wanted either. As of now I will stay with my parents. The kids are happy, my parents are happy and I had 7 hours of sleep last night.

Here’s the input from the Reddit crowd:

Bambie-Rizzo −  How did it go from taking a 3 hour nap to gathering evidence and leaving your husband? The second post was deleted. I’m so lost!

MrsPandaBear −  I remembered this post. I didn’t keep up with it before so I didn’t realize the husband was an even bigger j**k than the original post implied. Yeah, sounds like OP is far better off without the husband and even without parental help, probably end up doing far less work! Good for you, OP!

I_Thot_So −  You are a f**king WARRIOR. You knew something was up, and that’s why you posted in the first place. He intentionally pulled the wool over your eyes and you knew to try and remove it. Your instincts are better than you think.

You did everything you needed to do to get out of this situation, and the ONLY person responsible for putting you in it was HIM. **This was not your fault.** Your kids are so lucky to have you as a mom and it sounds like they’ve got some awesome grandparents as well.

That’s more family than a lot of people have, so don’t ever think you’re not enough for them. I wish you the best. You’re doing **great** so far. ❤️

[Reddit User] −  As a child of abuse, I’m proud of you for fighting for your kids. Make sure you get yourself some therapy when you’re able to, and enjoy settling into your new routine!

Soft-Syrup −  Just spent about 40 minutes going through your previous post – damn I am so happy for you. You deserve a happy, healthy life, in which you are your own independent human. And to all those people who commented “everyone always says every little thing is a red flag for abuse and leaving is the only option it’s so dumb lol she needs to just deal with it” EFF YOU.

thiccy_vicky −  I had just given birth shortly before your original post… I sat and cried for you (thanks postpartum hormones) thinking of you doing all that alone without any sleep. I was having such a hard time WITH a super helpful husband so my heart went out to you. Now I’m crying happy tears that you and your babies will have a happier life moving forward.

ElecktraStar −  I don’t think he will fight for custody since he was always disappointed that our daughter wasn’t a son and our son isn’t the strong little boy that he wanted either. Man, everything about your soon-to-be ex just stinks. Good on you for asking for advice, getting out and reaching out to what seems to be a supportive family. Good luck!

thunderousmegabitch −  I remembered this post today, and decided to go to your profile to see if you ever posted any updates or responses to the original thread – and I’m so glad I did. I’m so happy that you’re finally free and that your family is being helpful and supportive. I hope all the legal proceedings go smoothly.