My (28F) best friend (28F) kissed my husband (27M) and it’s destroying me. How do I proceed?
A 28-year-old woman shares the devastating experience of her best friend of 10 years forcibly kissing her husband of six years during a casual barbecue at their home. Despite her husband’s immediate rejection and transparency, she’s left grappling with betrayal and struggling to trust again. Read her heartfelt story below.
For those who want to read the following part: https://aita.pics/yOtUm
‘ My (28F) best friend (28F) kissed my husband (27M) and it’s destroying me. How do I proceed?’
I (28F) have been with my husband (27M) for six years, married for four years, and we have two kids (3F, almost 1F). Everything in our relationship is perfect for us. He’s the best husband and father to our kids that I could have asked for. I am absolutely in love with him and his actions and words have always shown me that he feels the same way. There’s no better feeling than going to sleep in his arms every night.
Last weekend, my husband and I had some friends over and we were having a barbecue. We were all outside in the backyard, surrounding my husband who was on the grill. As the food got closer to being ready to eat, we all started sitting at our backyard table.
Once the food was all ready and at the table, my husband went inside to use the washroom and get another case of beer. I didn’t realize that my best friend (28F) had followed him. When he was coming back out, my best friend hid behind the wall separating our kitchen and living room and surprised him by pulling him and forcing a kiss.
My husband immediately pushed her back and yelled wtf. She immediately started crying and ran out of the house and left. My husband came back into the backyard and asked to speak to me privately and immediately told me what had just happened. I was shocked and told him that it would be okay and that we could talk after everyone else left. I managed to put on appearances for the next couple of hours but I was mentally distraught.
After everyone left, my husband sat me down and told me what happened and showed me the footage from our living room camera. It was exactly as my husband has described it. My best friend of 10 years, the person who I treated as my literal sister, forcibly kissed my husband.
After the third date with my husband, she was the one I told that I was going to marry him. She knows how much I love him and how strong our relationship is and still she chose to try to come in the middle. For f**k’s sake, our 3 year old calls her “Aunty”.
My best friend tried showing up the next day “just to talk” and my husband had to hold me back from beating the s**t out of her and he kicked her out and told her to not come back. It’s been almost a week now and I’m nowhere close to moving on. I don’t blame my husband one bit.
He’s completely innocent in this and if anything, he’s the victim. I’ve been lying down on my husband’s chest and just crying every day and night. I’m so angry and frustrated and don’t know what to do. My husband has been amazing and like always, he just gets it and understands how I’m feeling.
He brought me flowers almost every day and cooked my favorite meals multiple times in the last few days. I love and appreciate him all the more for it. I just don’t know how I’m going to move on and trust any of my friends again after this.
Take a look at the comments from fellow users:
Potential-Diver3137 − You move on from that friendship and tell her not to contact you. There’s no way she can explain it and you just can’t trust her anymore.
Mummysews − Appreciate your man, honey – he’s doing his best to comfort you, even though it was him who was grabbed. Show him the same love right back at him. Make him his favourite foods and just be there for him. I know you are, but make sure he knows it. <3
HeartAccording5241 − Kick your friend to the curb she’s not a friend
sosotrickster − Make sure you’re also treating him with the same care! It seems you guys have a good relationship, so I’m just saying this because he was a victim of a**ault!. What a s**tty situation… I hope you’re both able to heal from this ridiculous betrayal. Edit: typo. Shout-out to everyone being silly in the replies
420fixieboi69 − Honest to God we had the exact same situation happen. My wife’s former best friend was in a long term unhappy relationship. Her boyfriend was a scrub who didn’t want to get married, didn’t want to go back to school, and worked a part time gig as a 35 year old trust fund barista while she took in all the money.
She constantly complained about his lack of interest in s**, dates or even alone time with her. She wants to be a mom, he hates kids. She was 35 and willing to stay because she was afraid to start over.
My wife and I had a bunch of friends over for a big party the day before our wedding, we had a courthouse wedding so this was like our reception. She came over to help me set up while my wife was gone getting her hair done. As I turned the corner to set up the table she came out and put her hand on my chest and leaned in to kiss me.
I gently pushed her away and pretended like it didn’t happen. Didn’t want to ruin my wife’s party. It was eating me up and I told my wife the next day after we had s** on our wedding night. She was really angry at first but we talked about it and came to a conclusion that her friend was actually a sad character.
This girl had a string of bad relationships with complete chuds. Her current partner didn’t really like her and she was just looking for happiness. My wife and I have been together for 10 years and are best friends. We’ve had our issues but overall we love each other and genuinely enjoy our time together. We are both ambitious in both our careers and passions and are raising a beautiful baby girl together.
I’m not a super hot guy. I’m balding, athletic but no six pack. I’d rate myself a 6.5 on a good day. It wasn’t about that. It was that this woman was seeing her best friend happy and getting married, something that she would likely never have. Maybe she wanted to sabotage her friend’s happiness because misery loves company.
Maybe she saw a man who is willing to commit and love his wife and wanted to steel me away as a last ditch effort to have that in her own life. Either way, after staying up for hours hashing it out, my wife determined that she would end the friendship, but also she was able to let go of the anger.
She started to pity this girl that she was never able to find love, and that her desperation reached such a low point. Maybe this story will help you come to the same conclusion. Either way, your husband is a good man.
SnooFoxes4362 − You were betrayed and lost your best friend, he was s**ually assaulted. Yes, a minor SA, but still, please process that with him because he’s GOT to be wondering if he ever gave off any mixed signals and might feel guilty.
Even after you’ve already discussed it a bunch he could start feeling that, and I’m pretty sure people are going to ask him that repeatedly so he could easily start to doubt himself.
He’ll also be thinking about signs she was giving off that he missed, and might want to spend a couple hours going through past encounters with you to try to put it all to rest. Regular processing s**t, but for him, and as a guy he won’t let his mind go there while he’s comforting you. Fair enough, but eventually, when you’re ready, you be sure to be the one helping him get through this ok?
vndin − You’ve got a real loyal man. Love him and hold him tight. As for the friend… I too would be piiiiiiiisssed. She just tried to grenade your marriage with no warning at all, I’m not sure any “talking” is necessary. To me that relationship is over. Quite honestly, u have footage… id put that s**t out there so she cannot try to spin a bs story to play the victim
CS1703 − Wow what a horrible betrayal OP.
z-eldapin − I get that you lost a friend. Your husband was s**ually assaulted. Please be sure to support him as well as he is supporting you.
InternalLevel1769 − Your husband sounds like a gem. Your friend sounds jealous of you and she’s trying to be a pick me girl. You have every right to wanna beat her up for assaulting your husband. Remove her from you life!!
Have you ever faced a betrayal from someone close to you? How did you cope and rebuild your trust? Share your advice and stories in the comments—support can make a world of difference.