AITAH for refusing to share my baby name choice after my sister-in-law “claimed” it for her future child?

A Reddit user and her husband chose a meaningful name for their baby, inspired by her late grandmother. However, her sister-in-law, who isn’t pregnant but has been trying, claims she had already “called dibs” on the same name for a future daughter.

After refusing to change the name, tensions have risen, with some family members taking sides. Read the full story below to see if you think she’s in the wrong.

‘ AITAH for refusing to share my baby name choice after my sister-in-law “claimed” it for her future child?’

I (31F) am currently 7 months pregnant with my first child, a baby girl. My husband (33M) and I have spent a lot of time picking out a name that’s meaningful to us. The name is actually a nod to my late grandmother, who I was very close with, and it’s a name that isn’t super common anymore.

We decided to keep the name private until the baby’s born. Here’s where things get awkward: my sister-in-law (SIL), Laura (29F), isn’t pregnant yet but has been trying for a baby with her husband for a while.

She has shared some potential names she likes, and it turns out one of her top choices is the exact name we picked for our daughter.
When we all got together for a family dinner recently, someone brought up baby names, and I jokingly said, “Oh, we have one picked out, but it’s a surprise!”

Laura pushed me a bit, asking for a hint, so I finally shared that it’s my grandmother’s name. She immediately guessed the name, and when I confirmed it, she looked shocked and said, “But that’s the name I wanted for my future daughter!”

She asked if I would pick something else since she had “called dibs” on the name first. I told her I didn’t think it was fair to ask that, especially given the family connection. She got pretty upset and said I was being “s**fish and inconsiderate” because I know how much she wants that name.

Now, my husband is totally on my side, but Laura has been cold to me ever since and has even brought it up in front of other family members, saying she “can’t believe I’d take a name she told me about.”

Some of the family thinks it’s a bit harsh of me to use a name she clearly had in mind, while others think it’s unreasonable of her to expect me to give it up. So, AITAH for sticking with the name we chose, even though my sister-in-law wants to use it in the future? Note that she never mentioned the fact she was planning to use this name.

Take a look at the comments from fellow users:

BeerDudeRocco −  NTA. She ain’t pregnant, so everything is hypothetical with her (not to sound rude, but I know getting pregnant can be hard and it doesn’t always happen).

It isn’t right to ask you to pick a less meaningful name because she had that name on a list of possible future baby names. She needs to get over it and pick a new name for her future hypothetical child.

FloMoJoeBlow −  NTA. First, who gives a s**t if cousins have the same name? Secondly, you told her the name before you knew that she wanted to use the same name. She can’t claim she called dibs on the name, when you told her first. Let her be a moody b**ch, and move forward happily with the name you want!

BeachinLife1 −  She’s does not even have a child on the way. When she does, it may not be a girl. She does not own a name.
Tell her that you “called dibs” on it years ago, because you always planned to name your child after your grandmother. I don’t even know why this is up for discussion.

Particular_Cress_634 −  NTA. It’s your grandmother’s name.

Newgirlkat −  SIL isn’t pregnant. SIL doesn’t even know if her future baby will be a girl. SIL doesn’t have any connections to the name other than oh that sounds pretty! Along with other names. You can’t call “dibs” on a frigging name, especially if it’s one that has a significant connection to you not to her.

Sorry SIL you have good taste, you have other options on your list, you have no idea if your hypothetical future baby will even be a girl, it could be a boy. This is why you don’t say a word about the name of your choice until that baby has a birth certificate signed and delivered.

UNLESS you want someone else’s input or REALLY trust that person. Next time, if there’s a next time, don’t even say anything other than “everyone will know when baby is here”.

FirewoodCampStaff −  After looking at your post history, you’re trolling.

judgingA-holes −  She has shared some potential names she likes, and it turns out one of her top choices is the exact name we picked for our daughter. Note that she never mentioned the fact she was planning to use this name.

I mean you said it was her top choice and then said she never mention she planned on using it…. That’s a bit contradictory there. She doesn’t own the name and she isn’t pregnant with a child, so you being pregnant effectively give you first dibs.

lilmissscurvy −  Honey, you’re not wrong here, not one bit. That name’s got heart because of your grandma, and Laura can’t just “call dibs” on a family name, especially when she never said a word about it before.

Bless her heart, she might be upset, but this is *your* baby and *your* choice. Stick to your guns—you got every right to honour your grandma just how you want. NTAH.

TrunksTheMighty −  I am so sick of these fake posts here it’s making me lose my mind.

Melodic_Pattern175 −  I’ve seen this story sooooo many times now 🙄

Do you think it’s fair for the mom-to-be to use the name with sentimental value, or should she respect her sister-in-law’s “dibs” claim? How would you handle a family conflict over a meaningful name? Share your thoughts below!