AITAH for not using my parental leave to take care of my sister’s baby?’
A manager, feeling burnt out from work, discovered that he qualifies for paid parental leave after recently adopting his husband’s teenage sons. However, his sister, who works at the same company, is upset because her position doesn’t offer paid parental leave, even though she’s expecting a baby soon.
She asked him to delay his leave until after her baby is born, hoping he would babysit to save on childcare costs. The brother wants to take leave now to recover from burnout and is reluctant to babysit a newborn. His sister thinks it’s unfair since teenagers don’t require the same care as a baby.
 ‘AITAH for not using my parental leave to take care of my sister’s baby?’
I’ve been very burnt out from work and wanted to take some time off. I found out through my boss that manager’s, like me, get paid parental leave. Since I adopted my husband’s sons earlier this year I qualify for it. He said it still count’s even though both boys are teenagers.
My sister who also works for the same company found out and she’s upset because she is pregnant and doesn’t get paid parental leave since she’s not in a management position. My sister doesn’t think that’s fair since my boy’s don’t need to be watched like her baby will.
Now she wants me set up my parental leave later to coincide with right after she has her baby so I can babysit for her and she won’t have to pay for childcare. To be honest I don’t want to. The whole reason I was going to take time off was because I am burnt out right now and need time to relax.
If I waited for her I’d have to wait 4 more months until she has the baby. I don’t have any experience with babies, but if it’s anything like tv shows in movies I doubt I’d be able to relax while watching a newborn baby.
Here’s what people had to say to OP:
Ok_Consideration1284 − NTA if your burnt out taking care of a newborn will not help. Sincerely, a mom of an 8 month old who was not burnt out before delivery… 🙄
presearchingg − NTA. Your parental leave is yours to do with what you please. It sucks that your sister doesn’t get paid parental leave though.
AdvertisingFree8749 − NTA and it’s pretty s**fish of her to feel e**itled to YOUR leave.
Single_Vacation427 − NTA. Even though the teenagers don’t need constant supervision, I’m sure having teenagers is one of the reasons you are burned out.
Dazzling-Treacle-269 − NTA. The reason you get parental leave even though the kids are teenagers is to bond with them. Spend your time relaxing, and bonding with your kids in a fun way.
Far-Cup9063 − Taking care of a newborn is not relaxing. It’s stressful and difficult. You need some time off for you to relax. Just take your time off and your sister can hire some help.
FormerRunnerAgain − NTA, unless you don’t point out loud and clear that your company is a slimeball. They give parental leave to management, but not to the lower paid staff that often have fewer options.
jacksonlove3 − What? Definitely NTA and your existent row pretty damn e**itled! She made this decision to have a child! It isn’t your responsibility to provide free childcare for her, period!
Aluminarty666 − NTA. It isn’t your baby.
nickis84 − NTA- This is your parental leave that you are using to deal with a burn out. Your sister chose to have a child and she knew she would need to find childcare. You taking care of demanding, screaming newborn is not going to help your burn out, might make significantly worse!
Is he wrong for prioritizing his mental health and refusing to use his leave to babysit? Or is his sister being unreasonable with her request? What do you think? Share your thoughts in the comments!
