AITA for telling my roommate that either his pregnant girlfriend stops whining or he moves out?

Living with a roommate can bring its own set of challenges, but when unexpected changes—like a pregnancy—enter the mix, it can make everything feel more complicated. In this case, a young man is faced with the increasingly disruptive behavior of his roommate’s pregnant girlfriend, who is frequently staying over. Despite having agreed to let her stay on occasion, the demands and discomforts of pregnancy have led to frustration.
As tensions rise, he faces a difficult decision: does he compromise on his comfort, or does he stand firm on his boundaries? This dilemma explores the balance between being a good roommate and maintaining personal space, especially when it feels like the situation is spiraling beyond what was originally agreed upon.
‘AITA for telling my roommate that either his pregnant girlfriend stops whining or he moves out?’
When living with roommates, it’s crucial to establish clear boundaries and respect for personal space—both for your well-being and to ensure a harmonious living situation. In this case, the pregnant girlfriend’s constant presence and the issues caused by her morning sickness, such as vomiting and increased bathroom use, have disrupted the original living agreement.
Relationship expert Dr. Laura Berman advises, “Respect for each other’s personal space and boundaries is fundamental in any shared living situation. If one person is consistently violating those boundaries, the other person is within their rights to ask for a change.”
The roommate, in this case, was fully justified in asking for the situation to change, particularly because his work-from-home lifestyle was being severely disrupted. His feelings of frustration are valid—especially given that he had already compromised by allowing his roommate’s girlfriend to stay over on occasion.
At the same time, while the girlfriend’s pregnancy is a physical challenge, it should not come at the expense of someone else’s comfort and living arrangements. Dr. Berman’s insight emphasizes that the decision to ask his roommate to move out isn’t just about discomfort—it’s about setting boundaries that allow everyone to live respectfully and comfortably within their shared space.
Here’s the comments of Reddit users:
The majority of Reddit commenters are on the side of the original poster, agreeing that the roommate’s actions—asking for his pregnant girlfriend to stop staying over or that he move out—were justified. They note that while pregnancy comes with its challenges, it does not give the girlfriend the right to disrupt someone else’s life in such a significant way.
Many comments suggest that the roommate needs to make alternative living arrangements before the situation escalates further, especially with the impending arrival of the baby. Some commenters express concern about the potential future situation, where the roommate may try to have his girlfriend and child live in the apartment. The consensus is that if the situation is not addressed now, it will only get more complicated in the future.
Ultimately, the original poster is not in the wrong for setting boundaries and asking for a change. It’s essential to protect personal space and comfort in a shared living environment. In situations like these, communicating needs clearly and respectfully is key—especially when the demands of one person start to significantly affect another’s well-being.
Would you handle this situation differently? How would you address it if your roommate’s partner became a regular part of your living space? Share your thoughts, and let’s discuss how to manage shared spaces and personal boundaries in living situations.