AITA for sending my coworker into anaphylactic shock?

A worker faced repeated lunch thefts at their office and unknowingly sent a coworker into anaphylactic shock when that coworker stole their lunch containing peanut sauce. The coworker, severely allergic to nuts, ate the food without realizing, leading to hospitalization.

Now, the coworker’s father (who is also the boss) is blaming them for the incident and demanding they cover medical expenses, while some colleagues are siding with the boss. They’re questioning whether they’re the AH, despite being the victim of theft.

‘ AITA for sending my coworker into anaphylactic shock?’

I’m at a loss here guys. Realistically, I know I’m in the clear. Legally, I’m in the clear. But I’m being vilified by my coworkers, and I’m genuinely considering quitting my job because of this mess. So I work a pretty standard day job, and at night I help my friend at her restaurant, which serves an assortment of Thai cuisine.

Tbh I’m insanely picky, but I fell in love with this peanut sauce the main chef makes, and he showed me how to make it, so about once a week I take it on either noodles or stir fry to my day job for lunch. People know this and a handful have tried it. It smells nutty, it tastes nutty. It’s white girl pad Thai, basically.

Lately my lunches have been disappearing, or I’ll open my lunchbox to find half of my food missing. I’ve tried addressing it, but nothing has been changing, and I was pretty sure it was one of the new hires that was doing it, but had no proof. Until now.

Thursday I took my noodles, and my entire tupperware was missing, which hasn’t happened before. I’m pissed, but what can I do? A coworker shared her pizza with me and that was that, until today. My boss confronted me and accused me of poisoning my noodles because his daughter (one of the new girls) “borrowed” my lunch and had to be hospitalized.

Turns out she’s severely allergic to nuts, ate some and boom. Anaphylaxis. She used an epi pen, had to be hospitalized and now her dad is trying to hold me accountable for her bills and condition, but I don’t see it. Why should I pay? I don’t mark my food as an allergen because I’m not allergic to it,

she was just dumb enough to steal from me and eat something she can’t have. But he’s being hateful, and some of my older coworkers are icing me out because I warned him I’d report any harassment to HR if he tried anything funny.

Brown nosers, I guess. My friend is aware and offered me a full time job, but I just can’t help but feel it’s unfair. At the same time, I could have killed his daughter tho… So, AITA?

Here’s the feedback from the Reddit community:

Forward_Squirrel8879 −  NTA – Go to HR immediately and make them aware of what is going on. You did absolutely nothing wrong and your boss’s behavior is 100% inappropriate.

The_Void33 −  NTA- You didn’t feed it to her. She stole it. At the same time, I could have killed his daughter No, she could have killed herself. My wife had a heavy duty seafood allergy. She wouldn’t eat anything without knowing what was in it. Like, Cesar Salad dressing has anchovies in it.

Other sauces are made with seafood to. It can had in places you wouldn’t expect. So, she would never take someone else food (on principle first, because it’s stealing) because it could be life threatening.

I would have thought that anyone with a severe food allergy would take the same precautions, but obviously not. Well, Next time she’ll think twice before “borrowing” someone else’s food.

Madison_M_M −  Absolutely 100% NTA. My boss confronted me and accused me of poisoning my noodles because his daughter (one of the new girls) “borrowed” my lunch. Borrowed??? And how exactly is she going to return this food that she *borrowed* after ingesting it?

It’s not  borrowing when she was never planning on returning it or compensating you. I’m so sorry that your boss is terrible. She stole your food. She didn’t ask, she just took it upon herself to take *your* lunch. She is the TA. Is she only doing this to you or is she taking everyone else’s lunch as well?

Away_Refuse8493 −  NTA Go to HR pronto. Don’t threaten HR. Get this on file. See if you can switch departments or supervisors. Report both your boss and his daughter, the food thief.

Similar-Koala-5361 −  Go to HR ASAP. In HR terms what happened is someone stole your lunch and the container it was in. The person who did this is another employee’s close relation, and because that employee is your manager you are facing bullying and reprisal from your manager, and further bullying and hostile work environment from coworkers.

You do not need to put up with this, you are not in the wrong. The daughter, the boss, and the coworkers are all in the wrong and you need to document and report. Unfortunately it’s unlikely you can just go back to normal, but what your boss and coworkers are doing is not just s**tty but potentially illegal and certainly a liability HR should deal with.

Typically this type of mess is why companies are wary of hiring relatives of employees except as interns/short term hires.. Edit: Hey, thanks for the awards! Also, if you’re just generally feeling like you are getting the cold shoulder and don’t know that coworkers are doing anything wrong,

just jot down the times you have felt treated differently as well as anything anyone explicitly said or did. They likely will not get in much trouble but a difficult atmosphere resulting from conflict with someone in management is 100% something to take to HR. It shows the toxicity of the situation.

ZombieZookeeper −  Stop reading. Go to HR and report this before your boss spins it to them as you doing this intentionally. Read the rest of the comments later.. NTA though.

lesbian_goose −  NTA She stole from you, and that’s what happened. It’s not your fault that the boss’ daughter didn’t check for peanuts. 100% her own fault. Report the boss to HR regardless, and warn him that you’ll report him again if he takes revenge on any kind on you. Don’t pay a cent towards her medical bills, bill her for the food she stole.. EtA: report her as well.

rapt2right −  NTA She,the lunch thief, is an i**ot . If she’s ond enough to be in the workplace, she’s *WAY PAST* old enough to know better than to steal and it’s insanity for someone with an allergy to a common ingredient to eat random foods without knowing what is in them. You didn’t put her in the hospital, she put herself in the hospital.

I suggest going to HR and getting your side of this story on the record. It’s pretty iffy that the daughter was put under her father’s supervision- reeks of nepotism . I also suggest getting out of this work environment, if not by leaving the company altogether then by exploring the possibility of another team, another department, definitely another supervisor.

claypolejr −  NTA. His daughter could have killed _herself_ by eating food without knowing what was in it. How were you to know? You don’t “borrow” lunch. You “steal” it.

Ducky818 −  NTA. You shouldn’t have to mark your food for potential allergies cuz other people are not supposed to be taking your food. They do and that is called stealing. Boss’ daughter stealing your food, going into anaphylactic shock, and ending up in the hospital is NOT your responsibility. It is on her.

He can say you poisoned her but that is because he can’t bear to blame his little darling for her sticky fingers. You should not be on the hook for any of her medical bills.
I would consider looking for a new job cuz boss man is going to make your life hell, even if you report him to HR. ETA: You did not almost kill the little darling. She almost killed herself. You had nothing to do with it.