AITA for returning home after I found out that my husband booked 1st class for him and his friend while I got economy?

A Reddit user shared their frustration after discovering her husband booked first-class tickets for himself and his best friend while assigning her an economy seat on their international trip. This was supposed to be their first getaway in years, but the unequal treatment left her feeling excluded and disrespected.

After confronting her husband, he dismissed her feelings, arguing she should be grateful for the ticket since she doesn’t work. The situation escalated when his friend called her entitled for staying home instead of accepting the arrangement. Now, she’s wondering if she overreacted by refusing to go.

‘ AITA for returning home after I found out that my husband booked 1st class for him and his friend while I got economy?’

My husband and I 30s haven’t been on a trip (out of coutry) for years. while he goes every year with his best friend. his reasons for going with him is because they both go to attend sporting events. This year, my husband told me I could go with him and his friend since they were visiting a new destination.

He paid for my ticket and everything else since I’m a sahm and have no job. the kids were left with my mom. However. When I found out that he had booked 1st class for himself and his friend while I got economy. I just couldn’t hold my tongue.

I confronted him about it and he at first refused to discuss then when the argument got heated he yelled “I PAID FOR YOUR TICKET FFS!!! ISN’T THAT ENOUGH???” then kept on about how I should stop acting like I was “royalty” and that if I come to think about it, even economy is fine for me since I “technically” don’t work anyway.

I cried because of what he said but decided to just not go altogether. He changed his tone and started begging me to just go with what he planned but I declined. I went to pick the kids from my mom’s house and he came back 3 hrs later huffing and buffing about what happened.

His friend sent me a text calling me entitled, and said this was the reason why he didn’t want my husband to take me with them and I just proved his point. I did not respond but I blocked him since he’s gotten increasingly rude over the past few months.

He (my husband) said I keep crying about being excluded and this is what happens when he finally decides to include me. amitheasshole for not settling for economy? by the way he’s perfectly capable of financing the trip.

Here’s the feedback from the Reddit community:

RaysUnderwater −  If you’re a SAHM then all the money he earns is SHARED FUNDS. There is no “him” paying, in fact you paid for his first class ticket as much as he paid for your economy ticket. The level of disrespect is astounding. Divorce him and get half plus alimony.. NTA

Crlady −  Is your husband having an affair with his friend? Why is his friend so rude to you and why is friend being treated like the spouse in this situation?? Whether or not he’s having an affair he’s definitely shown you how he feels about you. Nta.

anon_user77 −  NTA Sounds like your husband is more interested in keeping an unpaid nanny/caretaker rather than a wife/partner/equal. OP, do you have the option to become more independent in your marriage? Perhaps get a job/side hustle to earn money etc? Do you have a separate savings account?

Who handles all the money in the relationship? Do you have your own social circle that your husband doesn’t interfere with? You don’t have to answer these questions to me, but please take a long, hard look at your relationship from all these perspectives, and if it comes down to it, please walk away.

We all deserve love and respect in any and every relationship. If this post is a reflection of how your husband treats you on the daily basis, please please walk away. Edit: Thank you for the awards kind kind strangers

Comfortable_Art_7682 −  Is anyone else suspect of this “friend”?

DogRescueLady −  Ummmm NTA and “he bought your ticket??” Uh no you bought your own ticket because if you are a SAHM then 50% of his salary is legally yours. It’s not his money to give you. You and he have money together.

crunchyboobs −  NTA, it’s clearly not an issue of affordability, what he did has basically telling if I’m forced to bring you on this trip, it’s gonna happen on my terms, as the breadwinner, and that’s kinda fucked up

[Reddit User] −  NTA. Your husband’s attitude is out of line. I absolutely hate it when sole providers act like this, treating their partners like lesser beings who should be grateful for every penny spent on them. As a sole provider myself, it enrages me. It costs me absolutely nothing to treat my partner like an equal.

Additionally, you could always run the numbers by him (how much full-time nannies and housekeepers make), and remind him as a SAHM you damn well have a job and provide a service he should be grateful for.

The argument isn’t about you having to ride economy, it’s the principle and what it implies. You are not worthy of first-class and you should be grateful he thought of you to begin with. What a joke. You were right to be offended and take a stand against this behavior. He needs to shape up and recognize your worth.

InvestmentNo4587 −  NTA. I saw someone comment earlier somewhere else saying if you’ve agreed for a SAHP, then all money earned is your (plural) money, as you’re doing half the work still (at least)

Murderous_Intention7 −  He (my husband) said I keep crying about being excluded and this is what happens when he finally decides to include me. Your husband didn’t include you. You were *excluded* by being put in economy while him and his friend went to first class. His friend is worth more to him than you. You’re NTA and ditch the extra baggie. You’ll feel a lot better in the long run.

mac2885 −  NTA. A SAHM is an equal partner in the relationship. You are not a second class citizen. The working partner does not have the right to use that to make you feel like trash or that you don’t deserve equal treatment. My wife is a SAHM. I can’t imagine us never taking vacations but using that time and money on my friends.

Never in my life would I think to book myself a 1st class ticket and not her. I very very frequently believe people in this sub dramatically over use the word “abuse” and telling people to leave, divorce, etc…

but in this case this is very very clearly financial abuse by your husband, who also just sounds like a n**ty, cruel person. NTA in any way and you should probably think pretty hard if this is how your entire relationship works and you want to keep going through that.