AITA for charging my friend more money after finding out I would be doing five separate photo sessions for their wedding?

A Reddit user (25F) shared a story about being a wedding photographer for a friend’s wedding. Initially agreeing to a $300 fee for two sessions, the scope expanded last minute to five separate shoots, prompting a modest fee increase to $550.

Despite working through illness and undercharging, the bride delayed payment and accused the user of being unprofessional. Years later, attempts to apologize and mend the relationship only deepened tensions. Read the full story below to learn more about the conflict and its aftermath.

‘ AITA for charging my friend more money after finding out I would be doing five separate photo sessions for their wedding? ‘

I (25F) was asked to be the wedding photographer for my friend’s (28F) wedding. Although I only had experience in artistic photography and public events, I reluctantly agreed after being assured it wasn’t “that different.” I offered to do the engagement and ceremony photos for $300, which is an extremely low rate, considering my limited experience.

A week before the wedding, my friend revealed new plans: I was to photograph the salon preparations starting at 7:00 AM, the ceremony, a reception the next day, and a park shoot afterward. This was way more than we initially discussed.

After consulting with her mom and sister (my best friend), I decided to increase the fee by $250 for the additional locations and time, bringing the total to $550. The couple agreed. The wedding went smoothly, but the reception was small, poorly lit, and difficult to shoot, and the park shoot was long.

By the end, I had thousands of photos to sort through. I told them it would take months to finish editing, which they understood, and reminded them I was still awaiting the rest of the payment. Shortly after the wedding, I developed severe health issues, was hospitalized, and was later diagnosed with a tumor crushing my windpipe.

Surgery and recovery delayed my ability to work on the photos. Needing funds for my medical bills, I asked for the remaining payment, but Bride 2 responded that they didn’t want to pay because the photos weren’t finished. She also claimed they had felt pressured to agree to the price increase.

I reminded her that they had changed the scope of the work last-minute and that I was already undercharging. She dismissed me, saying I wasn’t a “real professional” and implying my work wasn’t worth the price. This was devastating.

I had agreed to five shoots and worked through severe illness for a fraction of what most professionals would charge. Eventually, they agreed to pay the full amount but only after I delivered all the unedited photos. Once I sent everything, they blocked me on all social media, and I was effectively cut off from the family.

This created tension with my best friend, as I couldn’t attend events when her sister and wife were present. Fast forward five years. My best friend, feeling caught in the middle, asked if I could apologize to smooth things over.

Wanting to support her, I sent a heartfelt apology, admitting I should’ve drawn up a contract and regretting the negative feelings surrounding their wedding. Bride 1 responded coldly, claiming she didn’t know I was sick and blaming me entirely.

My best friend now feels worse, as her attempt to resolve things backfired. I’m left wondering: Was I wrong to charge more for the additional work, even though it was still a very low rate? And could I have handled the apology better?

See what others had to share with OP:

Any-Mode-9709 −  I reminded her that they had changed the scope of the work last-minute and that I was already undercharging. She dismissed me, saying I wasn’t a “real professional” and implying my work wasn’t worth the price.

This is where you should have quit, OP. Shooting a wedding is HARD, really hard, and as a “non=professional” you are going to get s**t on FOREVER for your work. You would have been literally better off being blamed for NOT shooting it than having them look at photos they do not like, for the rest of their lives.

A wedding shoot you are describing is easily 5000$ and would require at least three photographers. You were in way over your head. Apologies are not necessary and frankly you are better off without them.

DJ_Too_Supreme_AITA −  NTA. Eventually, they agreed to pay the full amount but only after I delivered all the unedited photos. Once I sent everything, they blocked me on all social media, and I was effectively cut off from the family.

This created tension with my best friend, as I couldn’t attend events when her sister and wife were present. They basically scammed you out of the money when they were the ones who sprang those new locations last minute. Why should you apologize when they tricked you into doing more work than previously discussed.

OP, let this be a lesson to never give the product before payment and also let this be a lesson to set up a signed contracted. Doing that, the next time a similar situation like this happens you can bring them to court and sue

Flimsy-Field-8321 −  NTA – did you ever actually get paid? Why the everloving heck would YOU apologize? You were more than generous and they were the ones taking advantage of you. If you did not get paid, can you still sue in small claims court? I would also tell everyone what they did to you.

Icy_Cardiologist8444 −  NTA. 1. The bride was overly demanding and just wanted something for cheap. You decided on a price, and then she added additional tasks, which absolutely necessitated a price increase.

Then, she tried to shaft you on the payment because you had severe health issues and couldn’t get things to her in what she considered a timely fashion. People like this are not your friends, and anyone who sides with her is not your friend either.

2. Your best friend was a j**k for asking you to apologize. This was one of those “be the better person” situations where you were asked to apologize when you were not the person in the wrong. The bride was a j**k, and you shouldn’t have apologized to her at all.

The bride had already shown you and everyone else what kind of person she was, so I don’t really feel bad for your best friend being upset after the apology backfired. She should never have asked you to begin with, and I do question why you needed to be the one to apologize.

3. The bride’s response to your apology just goes to further solidify the fact that she is a major j**k. She was the one in the wrong, but you apologized anyway; she then doubled down and continued to put all the blame on you. She is a selfish human being who has jo empathy for others and is just not a good person in general.

One of my biggest pet peeves is when people expect the person who was wronged to “be the better person” and make amends first. There is no point in apologizing when you weren’t the one at fault to begin with. I really hope that your best friend rethinks her friendship with the bride; if she doesn’t, I would rethink your friendship with her.

You went out of your way to appease your best friend and apologize when you had nothing to apologize for, and you were treated horribly again. Some people just don’t change, and you should always think twice about people expecting you to be the “better person” rather than asking the person who was actually wrong to apologize.

UnfairEntrance159 −  NTA. I laughed when they felt pressured to pay when they pressured you to do more unpaid labour.

Civil_Monitor1512 −  No you aren’t and based from your story you had the right to charge them and as the saying goes business is business if they have an ounce of respect for you and your profession then they would have discussed with you the change in scope and considered paying you more.

TextImmediate8931 −  lesson learned don’t photograph friends weddings. Seriously it’s always going to be a messy s**t show.

Diylion −  I’m sorry but ESH. I work in freelance. I often give my friends and families free projects and it’s totally reasonable to be late on those projects because you have other priorities, clients etc. but even on underbid projects it is very unprofessional to ask for final payment before work is done.

Your health issues are not your clients problem and when you asked for payment, they became your client. Also she shouldn’t be expanding the scope of work, but that’s also on you for not making a clear contract. This is why I never charge close friends and if anything I ask for a nice gift or a gift card.

xyzzy9099 −  NTA, you weren’t wrong and were more than fair. Agree that you should have had a contract, even with a friend. Life got in the way and ultimately they are the ones that are the least understanding of that.

Wakemeup3000 −  NTA. You agreed to do the pictures and then they decided to take advantage of you by adding additional locations. They were greedy and you were too accommodating.

Do you think the Redditor’s fee adjustment was fair given the expanded scope of work, or should they have stuck to the original price? How would you handle last-minute changes to a job, especially for a friend? Share your thoughts below!