A married man (M42) here on Reddit found my (25F) Facebook account with my real name and general location of where I live?

A Redditor (25F) shared her unsettling experience with a married man (42M) who initially engaged her in straightforward political discussions but gradually made inappropriate comments about her appearance and even found her personal Facebook account. While portraying himself as respectful and religious, his actions—including commenting on selfies and sending suggestive images—left her feeling confused and uneasy. Read her full story below for context.

‘ A married man (M42) here on Reddit found my (25F) Facebook account with my real name and general location of where I live?’

He’s 42, married and semi-consistently used to DM me on Reddit, a 25 year old girl. But I blocked him recently. Most of our talks were straightforward (aka non-flirtatious) political talks, but then he’d mention that I’m gorgeous and comment on my selfies. Not to mention MULTIPLE times a day he comments on girls’ selfies in the selfie subreddit. Yet he’s married to his wife 25 years.

He also said he’s a Christian and has religious values so idk. Again our convos are political and straightforward, they can go without being weird. But then during those convos he’ll say something like “in this day and age, beautiful women like you [insert political commentary].” Or just straight up DM me one of my own selfies saying “I like this look of yours right here” or something.

And it irritated me when he sent s*x**lized pics of misty the pokemon trainer and gardevoir the POKÉMON. But then he comes across as very respectful with everything… so, I’m just not sure what to think. How can someone come across as so respectful yet do things like THIS?

UPDATE:

Well now he found and followed my personal facebook account, so he knows my real last name and the general area I live in. He also sent through Facebook DM: “Hey, it’s [name]. I really hated having to dig like this but I am worried about you. I hope you are okay.”
Do I tell my parents? I live with them. They’re already mad at me after an argument we had where I ended up SH’ing. They’ve been kinda over me recently with my BPD tendencies. And now THIS? Do I just block and forget? Tell them?

UPDATE 2 : I came for genuine help because I didn’t know what to do. Honestly. I’m still getting conflicting advice, some saying to block and some not. This is why I’m so confused and why I asked what I should do. As a borderline, I feel truly rejected and just plain terrible. I was just trying to get honest help with a scary situation.

UPDATE 3: Guess what I did, fuckers? I messaged him back. And here I was being accused of looking for attention and only hearing what I wanted to hear, that I wasn’t going to respond no matter what and only wanted to hear that from others. Well I DID respond, because it seems that was the way to go after all. Even if it scared me doing that. In fact someone provided a good argument that convinced me further to go that way. So I hope all you absolute assholes are happy.

Also, Hey guess what guys? He replied (because I sent him a message like you fuckers were being assholes about the fact that I was questioning doing it for my safety), and he said “I am sorry, I hope you can forgive me, hope for great things for you, goodbye.”. Hope you pieces of s**t are happy.

Take a look at the comments from fellow users:

SnooRecipes9891 −  Tell your parents. Tell him to leave you alone or you’ll send all your communications to his wife.

Aussie_Foodie −  Tell a friend. Send the messages to his wife. You are an adult. Act like it.

Some_Ambition2768 −  Tracking you down like that is creepy. Tell him to not talk to you anymore and block him.

tossaway78701 −  “Any further attempt to contact me will be considered stalking and reported to the authorities “. Then block him everywhere and tell your parents.

Human_Dog_195 −  First of all, you are not a GIRL at 25. Second, just block him on everything.

WeeklyConversation8 −  Tell your parents. Just block him and make your account private. Make it so no one can message you that you’re not friends with. Facebook has increased their privacy settings. Get professional help for your mental health.

violue −  You’ve got enough going on without adding this guy into it. Stop posting selfies on reddit. Especially ones you’ve posted elsewhere, since they can be reverse image searched. Stop chatting up married men in their forties. And married men period. And men that lurk on selfie subreddits.

You have BPD, so this is all I assume rooted in attention seeking tendencies. You need to temper those urges with logic, and the logic is, there are a lot of creepy f**king dudes out there, and a lot of them are on reddit, and if you interact with the wrong one, you’re going to be stuck with a stalker, or a doxxer, or just plain end up in over your head.. Also, keep blocking this guy.

RetiredAerospaceVP −  There is something very off about this guy. His behavior is not normal. Block him. Do not respond in anyway.

Commercial-Net810 −  Yes this is extremely creepy. It’s not that hard to find someone’s personal information if you look hard enough and know what you are doing. You are not a “girl” you are a 25 yr old woman. If you are willingly posting pictures of yourself all over the internet, what do you think would possibly happen???Hhmmm…seems you are pretty naïve. You’ve opened yourself up to attention negative / positive.

Did you know he was married when you started talking to him on Reddit? Didn’t you learn about stranger danger and “what you post on the web..stays on the web”. How did he see pictures of you? There seems to be more to this story. I’m sure in between theses political discussions he was complimenting you etc. Tell your parents. Block him on all social media. Lockdown all your accounts.

GypsieChanterelle −  Why did you not block him? Make you account private too. No need to publish public selfies. Also, politely tell him to stop communicating with you.