AITA for asking if my cousin made her first million yet?

A Redditor shares a story from a family reunion where, after being mocked for their life achievements, they responded by claiming to have made their first million and asking their cousins if they’d done the same.

This comment shocked the family and led to the Redditor being asked to step outside. Now, they’re questioning whether their response was an overreaction or justified. Read the original story below to learn more about the situation and the family dynamics.

‘ AITA for asking if my cousin made her first million yet?’

Well, technically we’re a few hours away from 2021. So advanced happy new year. I’m currently outside on our terrace while my family is gathered in the livingroom after having asked me to step outside for a bit, because apparently I’ve ruined the mood. I’m turning to you guys to ask if I’m the a**hole for what I just did.

Family from all over the city has gathered to celebrate the new years. Covid is thankfully low in my city and we’ve taken the necessary precautions. As is typical of Asian family reunions, the old people in the family love to ‘check up’ on their nieces and nephews. One of my aunt’s A, loves to show off her kids’ achievements, particularly her daughter Pat.

While listing off her daughter’s achievements (passing the bar, recently getting married to a fellow lawyer), my aunt turned to me and asked what I’ve achieved in 2020. She began to list off all my lack of achievements, like how I’m thirty and still unmarred (I’m a dude, if that matters),

about how I’m still living at home with my parents and how I’m still driving my s**tty 2000-something civic. My other cousins joined in on the jeering and listed all the other failed aspects of my life. Now, I graduated with a degree in architecture, but after multiple attempts just can’t seem to pass the exam.

This has been a point of contention in the family because my other cousins are lawyers, teachers, etc, whatever. These days I basically work freelance from home. I don’t know why, but my aunt’s condescending voice got to me and I said “I made my first million this year.

Has Pat made her first million yet?” Then turning to my cousins I asked the same, “You guys made your first million yet? Because I have.” The room fell silent. I basically killed the mood. My dad asked me to go outside and relax because apparently I might have just ruined everyone’s new year celebration.. Was I an a**hole?

Here’s what Redditors had to say:

the-mirrors-truth −  NTA. Why does everyone get to d**p on you without you defending yourself? That should have ruined the night for your parents, them dumping on you like this

SoValkyrieMama −  NTA. If they don’t want to hear comparisons and criticisms from you, then they shouldn’t make comparisons and criticisms against you.

Hazed3223 −  NTA everyone seemed to just take it as a chance to attack you about stuff you haven’t achieved, but when you question them about making their first million they get mad. Ps keep going you’ll get that exam!

robblanco3 −  NTA – can’t argue with the numbers. That’s awesome. Your aunt is a j**k and your fam is maintaining this BS value-centered shaming status quo and got mad you upset that balance. Do you!

ColeDelRio −  Aunt: *asks for your achievement and mocks you*. You: I made my first million.. Aunt: *surprised pikachu face*. Nta.

[Reddit User] −  NTA I feel like you went less nuclear with your comment than in some of the other posts on here. It comes off a little sweaty and insecure but you could have said worse stuff and frankly they ought to also be saying something to your aunt about being mean. Edited to add: stop spending holidays with your families when you don’t get on, good people of Reddit 🙂 It’s a recipe for irritation.

pretttttykitty −  INFO: did you really make a million? Or were you just being defensive?

RavenxAlmasy −  NTA. I think the only way you could have handled it differently is by saying “I did achieve making 1 million this year so that’s a good achievement.” and not ask them if they made their first million yet. But that’s really nitpicking and I’m not even sure if that would have helped the situation at all. But not the a**hole at all.

HorseWithNoNames −  INFO did Pat get involved with making fun of you?

grumpi-otter −  If you asked only people of your own culture if you were TA, what would they say? I ask because it is my impression that the “young people” are supposed to “shut up and take it” when the “elders” speak in many Asian cultures. I don’t know the answer, and I don’t think it’s right, but if it’s a cultural thing for you, then maybe you are?

Was the Redditor justified in responding to their family’s condescending comments with a bold statement about their financial success, or did it cross the line and make the situation worse? How should the Redditor handle their family’s constant comparisons? Share your thoughts below!