AITA for telling one of my daughters classmates moms to f**k off about what I put in my daughters lunch?

A mom who frequently packs her daughter traditional Asian meals for school lunches was confronted by another parent complaining about the “smell” of the food. After the woman made racist remarks and demanded lunch changes, the mom firmly told her to “f**k off.” Her husband suggested a more diplomatic approach to avoid future trouble. Was she out of line, or just standing her ground? Read the full story below.

‘ AITA for telling one of my daughters classmates moms to f**k off about what I put in my daughters lunch?’

For some context before the story, I (38f) cook asian foods regularly for dinner and for my daughter, Lily’s (7f) lunches at school. This is because my family enjoys these foods, I like to cook these foods, and my mom cooked a bunch of these foods growing up since she’s half Japanese.

Often times I’ll either give my daughter some leftovers from last nights dinner, plus a fruit/veggie and a snack, or I’ll make her a quick little bento box or some other thing really quick.

So, after school one day, my daughter wanted to play on the playground for a bit before we went home. I said she could play for a few minutes, and she ran off to play. I was waiting next to this other parent, who we’ll call Debra. While I was waiting, Debra came up to me..

Debra: Are you Lily’s mother?.

Me: Oh, yeah, I am, why?

Debra: Well, your daughter’s lunches have been bothering my son, and I would like to ask you to pack something else.

Me: What? How are they bothering him?

She then proceeded to start talking about how her son was complaining about my daughters lunches smelling terrible, and that he thought it was disgusting. She also said her son didn’t eat most of his lunch because he was so grossed out.

Me: Okay…I understand your son doesn’t like the smell, but can’t he just sit somewhere else?

Debra: Are you kidding me? My son shouldn’t have to put up with whatever crap you make your daughter bring to this school. It’s disgusting!

And she started making more vaguely r**ist complaints, but I was fed up at this point.

Me: Listen, I understand your son might not like my daughters food, but he can very easily just not sit next to her. I’m not changing what’s in my daughters lunches because you and your kid don’t want to exist near Asian food. F**k off.

She angrily stomped off with her kid then, and my daughter finished playing soon after, so we went home. I talked to my husband about it, and he said that maybe I shouldn’t have told her to f**k off, to avoid her bothering us in the future. AITA?

Take a look at the comments from fellow users:

[Reddit User] −  NTA, racism should be always be called out and you were right to blow up on her Though I will admit your husband could have point as it is a possibility this is not the end of this conflict. If your child brings up anything about the other lady’s kid bullying her or anything, act on it quickly

hannahkelli −  NTA. That woman 100% earned the f**k off. We need to start telling more people to f**k off when they think that they should be able to tailor their experience of the world by controlling what other people are doing.

StonewallBrigade21 −  but can’t he just sit somewhere else? Yes, he can. So NTA if you continue to send her with whatever lunch you desire.

breadtwo −  as long as you’re not packing your daughter with a whole durian, I think it’s justified to tell this woman to go f herself 🤷‍♀️

baka-tari −  You didn’t go quite far enough. “F**k off, and when you get there f**k off again.” It’s none of their business what your daughter eats for lunch – it’s not like you’re forcing **her** kid to eat it.. NTA

Vegetable-Cod-2340 −  NTA. She was openly r**ist and aggressive, she gets what she gives. Op, I would contact the school and your kids teacher and let them know, at point I think the Debra son is sitting near Op’s daughter cause he likes bullying her about her lunch. Maybe a teacher intervention could prevent further harassment

[Reddit User] −  I feel like, F**k off was the perfect statement possible in this situation!. NTA

Snapdragon5180 −  NTA. The issue was already escalated when Debra approached with her r**ist BS. I would have told her to f**k off as well.

punnymama −  NTA!! Unless her kid has an anaphylactic reaction to soy she and her racism can f**k right off. For that matter even if her kid DOES have an anaphylactic reaction to soy, her racism can still f**k right off.

griffonfarm −  NTA.. First, Debra is being r**ist. Second, Debra’s son is going to have to learn that things he doesn’t like exist and will continue to exist no matter how he feels about them. I’d tell that entitled turd to f**k off too. And if her b**t starts bullying your daughter, contact the school and put a stop to it immediately.

Was telling the other parent off justified, or could a calmer response have been more effective? What would you do in this situation? Share your thoughts below!