My wife (36F) won’t stop forcing me to drink her coffee… I don’t want to hurt her feelings but I can’t go on like this.

A Reddit user shares their growing concern about an unusual situation at home: their wife, who recently lost her job, keeps bringing them excessive amounts of coffee throughout the day. Despite repeatedly expressing their discomfort and explaining the negative health effects, the wife continues to bring coffee, even making upset faces or refusing to speak when the user doesn’t drink it.

The user is at a loss for how to handle the situation without hurting their wife’s feelings. Read the full story below to learn more about their dilemma.

‘ My wife (36F) won’t stop forcing me to drink her coffee… I don’t want to hurt her feelings but I can’t go on like this.’

My wife (36F) lost her job recently, while I (48M) am currently working from my home office. Because I don’t often get a chance to take breaks, she is kind enough to bring me a coffee once in a while. Nothing fancy, just regular filter coffee.

This used to only happen once every few hours, so in an average day I’d drink maybe… 2-3 cups of coffee. That was fine. The problem has come in recent weeks. When I sit down at my desk (usually 8.00-8.30) there is a steaming cup of coffee waiting for me. Great. I drink it.

But almost as soon as I’ve finished, my wife will come in and leave me with a fresh cup of coffee. Every 15-20 minutes, she will come into the room and bring me more coffee. I like coffee enough in the mornings, but I do not need to chug gallons of it throughout the day. The mugs that she brings me are not small either.

There are some issues I don’t know how to explain or address. If I let the coffee go cold, she will make upset faces and often refuse to speak to me (sometimes for hours/even a full day) until I ask her for more coffee. I will admit that sometimes I deliberately don’t drink my morning coffee on purpose just so I can get a few hours of peace.

We’ve talked about this repeatedly and almost daily at this point. Every time she comes in with a coffee, I’ll tell her that I’ve had enough and I don’t want any more. She will often just silently put the coffee down next to me and the process will repeat again.

I’ve asked for other drinks (water, coke sometimes) and she will sometimes bring these instead, but as soon as I’ve finished she will bring me another coffee. Now I’m getting regular headaches, nausea, and sometimes I’ll be able to feel my own heartbeat. I don’t think for a second that all this coffee is good for me.

Here’s what Redditors had to say:

HatsAndTopcoats −  Somehow through all of this, you have never asked her, “Why do you keep bringing me all this coffee?” Edit: Stop telling me the post says they’ve talked about it. I don’t know what it says about society that so many people apparently think “I want you to stop doing this” is the same as asking her why she is doing this.

stealthyserpent −  It sounds like your wife is looking for a way to be useful after losing her job. I can imagine that must be really hard on her. Perhaps you could try to redirect her efforts into being helpful in another way?

MuddaFrmAnnudaBrudda −  I’m sorry, I’m trying to be sensitive, but how are you married and unable to tell your wife you don’t want anymore coffee?

Duke_mm −  Yeah, she needs a hobby. Ask her to bake a bread. Takes hours and is fun to do.

princessSnarley −  She isn’t trying to kill you by chance?

TheSoundOfKek −  It’s because she lost her job. She wants to pamper you because she doesn’t want you to think she’s *useless* without bringing in the bacon too. I know you love her, but you have to get distracted in your work. Have you guys went out on a date since this pandemic? Consider just driving and cruising around, even?

Do you make some time after work or during work? (Like on a break?) She wants to be a busybody, and she just wants to help ease your shoulders of the workload. I know it’s a pain in the ass, but rightfully so.

_AIK0_ −  People are having an odd time with their emotions. Maybe gifting is her love language and because, coffee is a simple loving thing she gifts you love constantly. I mean it sounds like a reaction from something way deeper.

im_phoebe −  I don’t know why but I’m laughing at this. I’m sorry.

[Reddit User] −  Is she trying to give you both a heart attack and the worst shits of your life what the f**k