I [30 F] am sitting in the back of my RV as my husband [32 M] rants about how lovely the trip would be if I hadn’t joined him.

A 30-year-old woman is having a difficult time on a trip in her RV with her husband, Tim. She purchased the RV with money she earned from a writing contract, intending it to be a space for her to use while Tim is away on business.

However, Tim has insisted on taking the RV on his business trips, despite her concerns, and now he is complaining about her presence on the trip, making her question their marriage.

‘ I [30 F] am sitting in the back of my RV as my husband [32 M] rants about how lovely the trip would be if I hadn’t joined him.’

This might be confusing, but I will try my best to be clear. I am typing this on my tablet, so please forgive me for any spelling/grammar mistakes. Just to note, this is the first time that an issue like this has come up in our marriage and I do not know what to do.

I have been writing romance novels since I was in college. I was a relatively successful author and I have made a living off selling my novels ever since. I do not make a lot of money, but I do bring home ~$40,000 a year in book sales.

This allows me to stay at home during the day so I can write and also make crafts to sell in my etsy shop. A few years after college, I met Tim and we instantly hit it off. We dated for three years before tying the knot and we bought a house shortly after.

Tim makes his living off his investments and stocks, however, we keep our finances separate. This is because Tim inherited a vast amount of money from his family and before we married, I signed a pre-nup agreement in order to ease his mind.

We both contribute an equal share to the joint bank account for bills, then we use the remainder of our money for ourselves. About a year ago I landed a contract to write part of a romance series. The contract was huge and the payout was over $120,000 for a few months’ work.

I contributed my share to the joint account and then put the rest of the money into the bank so I could buy an RV. I have always wanted an RV because I love to travel and nothing would make me happier than being able to write while on the road.

Tim is often away on business for days at a time, so the RV would give me an opportunity to get out of the house while he is away. After six months of deciding, I chose a lightly used RV and purchased it from the owners for a great price. When Tim found out I purchased the RV, he was excited.

He has a travel trailer, but it’s not the same as an all-in-one RV. He loves RVs and he wanted to immediately take it out for a trip across the state. We took our trip and Tim couldn’t stop talking about how much he enjoyed the experience and he started talking about taking more trips together.

I gently reminded him that even though the RV is a fun thing for us to have for vacations, that it’s main purpose is for me to have something to do while he is away for business (but that we would be taking plenty of vacations together!). Tim agreed with me and he let it go for a while.

The thing is, in the past few weeks, Tim has been badgering me about taking the RV with him on his business trips. He usually flies when he goes to check his rental properties/visit family and he is normally gone for 4-5 days at a time.

We got into an argument because he had to evict a tenant and he wanted to drive the RV across the state in order to do so. I asked him if I could come along, and Tim said he would prefer if I didn’t. I then said that if I couldn’t come with him, that he couldn’t take my RV.

I suggested that he take his travel trailer instead and he got mad and stormed out of the house. About an hour later, he started texting me like nothing had happened and then he said he was taking the RV as if our previous conversation had never happened.

I called him and tried to explain that he had just purchased a brand new pickup and that if I didn’t get to drive his new truck in his absence, why should he get to take my RV when I am not coming on the trip?

Tim and I went back and forth and eventually he said I could come along if it meant that much to me. I said I would, and now I am regretting everything. I am sitting in the back of my own RV with a man who won’t let me touch the wheel.

It has been three days since this trip has started, and all Tim has done is rant about how awesome the RV trip would be if I weren’t with him. It has made me question everything in our marriage, from how we split our finances to how we argue and function together.

This is the first time that anything like this has ever happened and I don’t know what to do in this situation. He is still ranting as I type this and he’s never done that before either.

Take a look at the comments from fellow users:

ladyxdi −  The tldr could read: “what’s his is his and what’s mine is his.”

onekate −  There is no way these issues are about an RV and a pick up truck. You should get thee to a marriage counselor so you two can get to the bottom of whatever your real issues are.

Bucky2015 −  Tim is a d**k. He was fine not sharing when he had nicer stuff but now that you have something nicer he he gets pissy that you won’t share. He really just sounds like a selfish a**hole.

mamaingrouchland −  Wow, your financial setup is kind of awful. It’s one thing for a person with a lot of money in accounts to want to have a prenup to ensure that they don’t lose that, or someone who owns an established business or significant assets. That makes sense to me.

But when one partner is rich and the other is making a normal living, it seems wrong to me that the rich partner wouldn’t want their spouse to have a higher standard of living while they are married. Your husband does sound like a d**k.

There is no way in hell you should be paying half of the expenses if your income is way less. He is a selfish b**tard. Why didn’t he buy himself an RV, since he can probably do that without batting an eye?

Seriously, I see situations often on this sub where a large inheritance can be a real negative in terms of a person’s suitability for marriage, as it makes them paranoid and unwilling to share,

where a normal person with a normal working life should be more generous and approach finances with a spirit of togetherness. At least you would have the right to expect that they would.

half-dozen-cats −  I just want to compliment you on your use of paragraphs. As for your real issue I’m afraid I don’t have much advice other than clearly there are larger issues here that probably need professional counseling.

You don’t want him using your RV, you can’t drive his truck, pre-nups and multiple accounts…honestly I had to check back to ensure you said husband. and all Tim has done is rant about how awesome the RV trip would be if I weren’t with him I can’t really fathom what his end game is. Why would he need the RV and to be alone?

six_of_swords −  The first major thing you buy with your own money, and suddenly he can’t resist having it to himself?

allthevultures −  I haven’t seen anyone else make this comment, and I hope I’m reading more into the situation than is actually there, but it sounds so much like there was an ulterior motive here…..?

Again, I really hope I’m wrong, but is there any way that he could have been planning to do something n**arious behind your back and wanted to use your RV to make it more convenient? I mean, it’s got a bed in it……

[Reddit User] −  You don’t sound very married, I’m sorry to say. This sounds like roommates who have a financial partnership. Do you even like each other? When do you do anything intimate, and I’m not talking about s**. When do you emotionally connect?

muffinopolist −  “This trip would’ve been so awesome without you.” “Damn. Should’ve taken your travel trailer then, huh?”

ttebow −  Sorry, sounds like you married an a**hole.