My boyfriend is scared he will cheat do I run

A Reddit user (20F) shares her dilemma after her boyfriend (20M) expressed his fears of cheating while she’s studying abroad. Though they broke up briefly due to financial stress and distance, they’ve continued their relationship as if they’re still dating.

The boyfriend admitted, while drunk at a party, that he regrets breaking up but fears he might cheat on her while she’s away, despite having been both cheated on and cheating in the past.

Now, the user wonders if she should proceed with their plan to get back together once she returns or walk away from the relationship due to his expressed concerns. Read the full story below to explore her conflicted emotions.

‘ My boyfriend is scared he will cheat do I run’

I(f20) and my bf(m20) have been dating for 4 months. We moved pretty fast and said I love you within 3 weeks. I have been planning on studying abroad for 5 months since before I left, he knew this and appeared to not have any problems with it.

Two weeks before the semester ended he broke up with me saying he felt like he had been a s**tty boyfriend(he had financial stressors and honestly couldn’t afford dinner). He texted me the next day saying he can’t stand not talking to me.

We have been broken up technically but acting like we have been dating. He got drunk at a party and talked to our friends(we share a friend group) about how he regrets breaking up but is scared he will cheat while I am gone.

He has both cheated before and been cheated on. We have a kind of planned get back together once I’m back. Do I stick to this or do I run? I understand the being scared I will cheat but why is he scared he will?

Take a look at the comments from fellow users:

Adventurous-Pin3403 −  Let the relationship end, I think you’re better off studying abroad with a clean slate. I think having a bf is nice but it’s simply too hard plus you guys haven’t been together for that long so I’m sure in a few months you’ll be fine.

You might even thank yourself so starting clean. And hypothetically speaking let’s say you move abroad and you still miss him if it’s meant to be he’ll wait for you too.

almostselfrealised −  He is saying it now so that when he does cheat he can say “I told you so” and make you think it was your fault. Leave leave leave. It’s only been 4 months, get out before you have anything to lose.

Kragg_hack −  Anyone bold enough to tell his friends that he is afraid he will cheat on you because you are away 5 months will most definitely cheat on you.

And if you continue to be with him, he can then say he told you so and you chose to stay with him, so is it really that bad? Don’t be with anyone that say a thing like this. Go abroad as single so you are free to do whatever you want when you are there.

Environmental-Age502 −  Personally, I wouldn’t continue to pursue this one. The reason I say that, is that the anxiety I would have around him cheating while I’m gone, due to his own fears of doing so to the extreme of preemptively leaving me for it, would ruin my time abroad and leave me an absolute wreck.

Complete_Hat6078 −  He’s just telling you what he’s gonna do. He’s not scared he’ll cheat, he just wants to and he knows he will.

livingmaster −  And I raaan. I ran so far awaayyyyy. I just raaaannn. I ran all night and dayyyy

cinnapear −  If he doesn’t trust himself, why would you trust him?

Gaelenmyr −  He is such a mess. Do not pursue him. You deserve better

VicePrincipalNero −  Let him go. You can do better.

Myrkana −  5 months is a long time to go without physical companionship that you had before. Hes being honest about how he feels at least. See if you two even want to be together again after your study abroad.

rust and security are key in any relationship, but fear can sometimes cloud judgment. Do you think it’s wise to give this relationship another shot, or are the doubts and insecurities a sign that it might be time to move on? What would you do if you were in this situation? Share your thoughts below!