AITAH: My kid wants me to drive 3 hours a day taking them to/from work. I said no?

A Redditor shared a dilemma about refusing to drive their 20-year-old child, who doesn’t have a driver’s license, 45 minutes each way to a new job—resulting in a daily 3-hour commitment. The parent, who works from home and has other responsibilities, offered to compromise by doing one trip per day but faced pushback from their child. Read the full story below.

‘ AITAH: My kid wants me to drive 3 hours a day taking them to/from work. I said no?’

My 20 year old child was offered a job 45 minutes from our house. They have no drivers license yet, and a car that was given to them, but they do not drive due to having no license.

They were just offered a job at a location 45 minutes from our house. Taking them to/from work every day would take me 3 hours. I work from home, and I have responsibilities. Also I just do not want to drive for 3 hours every day. I wouldn’t do that for ANY job.

My kid says I should be supportive and drive them, but I am just not going to do it. I told them that this was an unreasonable request, and I’d be willing to do one trip (1.5 hours) only. There isn’t run public transportation here either. AITAH?

Here’s how people reacted to the post:

ETFromme −  No. Why did they even apply if they didn’t know how to drive and couldn’t get there?

Smashy-B −  NTA. unless you gave a car to a kid without a license. if it were 20 minutes away? give the kid a lift. get yourself a nice coffee or a breakfast and start the day slow. but 45 each way? hell no.

Flat_Contribution707 −  NTA. Pose these questions to your adult dependent:

1. What is your backup plan if I am too sick to get out of bed?

2. What are you going to do if I have a work meeting that starts at the beginning of your shift?

3. Do you expect me to never go on work trips or vacations ever again? Remind them that they have a car sitting in the driveway and they are old enough to go to the DMV alone.

CosmicPolaris −  INFO. So why dont they go get their license?

Worth-Season3645 −  NTA…”I will not spend three hours out of my day driving you to and from work. I will help you get a driver’s license”.

Right_Count −  lol of course NTA. That’s an insane request. Even one way… what a waste of time/gas/car wear. This is just not a job your kid can accept.

louisianab −  Uber. their money, not yours. 

ODB247 −  My kid wrecked my car and I got a new one that he wasn’t allowed to drive. He got a beater but it broke down quickly and it didn’t make a bit of sense for me to pay to fix it. I gave him time and a deadline to find a ride to/from work. It was 45-60min there and back every Saturday and Sunday, meaning about 3-4 hours per day for me to do drop off and pick up.

It cost me more in gas than he made. He was SO mad at me for “making” him quit, I really think it took him a long time to stop being mad about it.You have to do hard things sometimes. And it sucks to be seen as the bad guy. NTA though . 

Traditional_Ear7846 −  Go get your license. YOURE F**KING TWENTY!

goldenfingernails −  NTA. Kid needs to get the drivers license pronto. Take them to the DMV and have them do their test. Otherwise, they are SOL and need to learn to plan better. At 20 years of age, they can’t expect their parent to bail them out because of their poor planning.

Do you think the parent’s refusal to make the daily 3-hour drive is reasonable, or should they support their child’s efforts to secure a job at any cost? How would you handle this kind of situation while balancing parental support and personal boundaries? Share your thoughts below!