AITA for asking my sister to cancel her plans to watch her own daughter after I agreed to babysit this Sunday?
A woman has been financially and emotionally supporting her younger sister, who became a single mother at 20. When the sister asked her to babysit this Sunday for a party, the woman agreed. However, after receiving an important work dinner invitation, she asked her sister to cancel her plans.
The sister reacted angrily, accusing her of selfishness and failing to understand the challenges of being a young mom. The woman feels justified in prioritizing her career opportunity over the babysitting obligation. Read the original story below…
‘ย AITA for asking my sister to cancel her plans to watch her own daughter after I agreed to babysit this Sunday?’
I (30F) have been supporting my younger sister, Cathy (23F), both financially and emotionally ever since she got pregnant at 20. The babyโs father left because he wasnโt ready for the responsibility, and since then, Iโve stepped in to help with everythingโher college tuition, rent, and pretty much all expenses related to her 3-year-old daughter.
Cathy is in university now and doing well academically, but she parties a lot on weekends, trying to live the life she missed out on. Last week, Cathy asked me to babysit her daughter this coming Sunday because a classmate is throwing a house party.
I agreed since I didnโt have any plans and I know how much she values the little time she gets to go out and relax. Iโve always tried to be understanding, given how much sheโs sacrificed being a young mom.
But yesterday, my boss emailed me, saying thereโs going to be a team dinner this Sunday with upper management, and it sounds like it might be a promotion celebration for me. Iโve worked really hard for this, and the opportunity to connect with the higher-ups could be huge for my career.
I told Cathy about the change in my plans and asked if she could stay home with her daughter instead, explaining how important this dinner is for my future.
Cathy completely flipped. She told me I was being unfair because I had *already agreed* to babysit and she was really looking forward to going out.
She said she rarely gets a break and deserves to have fun just like everyone else. I get it sheโs young, sheโs been through a lot, and she doesnโt get out much. But I also feel like Iโve done more than enough for her and her daughter over the past few years. Iโm not just her sister Iโm practically her financial safety net.
She told me I was โs**fishโ for trying to back out last minute and that I only care about myself and my career. I told her that while I want to help, this is a big opportunity for me, and I canโt always put her needs first.
I also pointed out that itโs *her* daughter, not mine, and itโs not unreasonable to ask her to miss one party to take care of her own child. Now, Cathy is giving me the cold shoulder, saying I donโt understand how hard it is to be a young mom and that Iโm putting my career ahead of her mental health and happiness.
AITA for asking her to cancel her plans so I can go to my work dinner this Sunday? Or is she being e**itled by expecting me to drop everything for her again?
Take a look at the comments from fellow users:
Sassy-Peanutย โย Cathy is a spoiled b**t – and if she feels your career is less important that her night out with friends, she cannot expect your financial support to continue either. Let her find out what being a single Mum is really like without you as her cushion.
Level-Tangerine-8172ย โย that I only care about myself and my career. Would the be the very same career that allows you to financially support her? She is being very e**itled and ungrateful.
Being a young, single parent is definitely hard, but it’s ultimately a decision she made for her life, and she needs to take responsibility for it. It sounds like you give her a lot of support of all kinds, and to need to attend a dinner that could be crucial for your career is way more important than a house party. NTA
IllustriousEnd2055ย โย but she parties a lot on weekends, trying to live the life she missed out on. sheโs been through a lot, and she doesnโt get out much.. INFO: Which is it?
Shadow4summerย โย NTA. My God, could she possibly wring any more out of you? Tell her you will not be babysitting that weekend or anytime in the near future. Until she can show a little gratitude she can f**k off. Why should you sacrifice so she can party?
And this is your JOB. Let your parents know youโre so glad they are willing to step up because you are done!
Cultjamm23ย โย You arenโt helping. You are enabling. Stop it.ย
Madmattylockย โย NTA, but you created this monster by not letting her feel the reality of the position sheโs in.
brenda_meevazquezย โย NTA. Given how long you’ve been providing for your sister and her daughter, it makes sense that you would want to put your professional development first.
She shouldn’t expect you to continuously put your life on hold for her; you deserve this chance. Instead of constantly depending on you, perhaps it’s time for her to take charge of her own child.
AutumnLaughterย โย You know I read Reddit too much when I already know your sister is going to bail on Sunday regardless and leave you watching the kid.
Please have a plan if she does this. NTA.
BlindUmpBobย โย This nay seem like a silly question, but how much did you enjoy the s** Cathy had when she got pregnant? Oh, you weren’t there? Then why would the result of that encounter be your responsibility.
She got herself pregnant, apparently by a man uninterested in parenting, and whines about being a single mom. If only science could discover how pregnancy happens…
Was it unreasonable for her to ask her sister to stay home? Or is the sister being entitled? What do you think? Share your thoughts below!