AITA for crying causing a wedding to be called off?

A Reddit user shares a story about how a wedding was called off due to an unfortunate incident involving a child’s severe peanut allergy. The user (31F) and her friend Anna (35F) went out to eat and forgot about Anna’s fiancé Alex’s (33M) daughter, Frankie, who has a life-threatening peanut allergy.

After Frankie ate something with peanuts, she had a severe allergic reaction, causing Alex to get upset and feel that the user and Anna weren’t responsible enough to be around Frankie.

This escalated into a fight between Anna and Alex, ultimately leading to the cancellation of their wedding. Now, the user is facing blame from both friends and family for the ruined wedding. The post concludes by inviting everyone to watch the story below.

‘ AITA for crying causing a wedding to be called off?’

I am 31F, I have a friend name Anna 35F and Alex 33M has a seven-year-old daughter named Frankie who has a severe peanut allergy. Alex is very protective of Frankie and takes great precautions to ensure her safety. One day, Anna and I decided to go to a restaurant, and we informed Alex beforehand.

He explicitly told us to make sure that there were no peanuts in the food. Unfortunately, in the midst of ordering our meals, I completely forgot about Frankie’s allergy, and she ended up eating something with peanuts in it. This resulted in Frankie having a severe allergic reaction and requiring immediate medical attention.

Upon learning about the incident, Alex understandably became angry and upset. He directed his frustration towards me and Anna, stating that we should have asked about the presence of peanuts in the food. Furthermore, he expressed that he no longer wanted me around Frankie if we couldn’t be more responsible I busted out in tears.

This argument escalated, leading to a major fight between Anna and Alex and ultimately causing their wedding to be called off . Now, both friends and family are placing the blame on me, stating that Anna and I should have been more cautious and that I ruined the wedding because I’m an i**ot who doesn’t listen

Here’s the input from the Reddit crowd:

Pepper-Tea −  I love how you purposely left out that you were the only adult at the table at the time of ordering. You are 31. If you think you can shake off any responsibility with ‘I just forget’ and ‘I’m not good at listening’, you might need to be accompanied by an adult to navigate daily tasks.
YTA. You could have killed that child.

Rohini_rambles −  YTA
I mean, you two LITERALLY could have been the cause of the little girl dying. The dad is 100% right to cancel the wedding if his kid isn’t safe around his fiance. but…. was it that you really forgot? Or did you want to test the limits? Or did you sort of wish that Anna wouldn’t marry him?

He directed his frustration towards me and Anna. WHO ELSE do you think should have been the target??? You two were the adults he gave the reminder too. Your friend has been with him for a while, you both KNEW FOR A WHILE about her allergy. He reminded you. After a while… sort of sounds weird you “just forgot”….

Rhades −  YTA for thinking this was because you cried, and not because you both failed to ensure that a KNOWN allergen was not present in food.

OIWantKenobi −  So, I thought you weren’t t-a until I read the comment that you ordered while Anna was using the restroom. You had ONE THING to remember. And it was a SEVERE allergy that could have killed a child.

You aren’t responsible for their break up, clearly something else was simmering beneath the surface. But still, YTA. It’s ONE THING. ONE VERY IMPORTANT THING. I wouldn’t want you around the child, either.

DielectricConstant −  YTA to both you and Anna. I don’t blame him for not wanting either of you around his child if you can’t remember a life threatening allergy.

Mendicant_666 −  YTA. And your misleading title makes you an even bigger one than usual. You almost killed a child. But you choose to make the situation about yourself and your “hurt feelings.” Despicable. The parents are right to keep you away from their children. Forever.

angel9_writes −  Just so I know I have this clear…. Anna and Alex were engaged. The two of you were out with Frankie. Anna the child’s FUTURE step mother did not make sure that there were no peanuts involved knowing this future child that would be in her care has a severe allergy.. You were also complicit in this?
A) Alex SHOULD have called off the wedding.
B) Why are you getting more blame than the woman engaged to the man?
C) wtaf does it have to do with YOU crying.
YTA, Anna’s the a**hole, Alex was smart by ending it and I hope Frankie is ok..

JMarie113 −  YTA. Not for him calling off the wedding but for your carelessness. You could have killed his daughter. Your friend should also not be near that girl. It’s not your fault the wedding was called off. But, he made the right call. Your friend is not fit to be her stepmother.

Veg0ut −  You ordered Kung Pao Chicken with an hour of being told of a severe allergy. You didnt just forget to ask them to make sure things was cooked appropriately. YOU ACTUALLY ORDERED A DISH THAT IS DEADLY to domeone with an allergy. You are either completelty next level incompetent or you were trying to hurt the girl. That is not just an innocent mistake.. YTA

Used_Mark_7911 −  YTA – Both you and Anna are if you aren’t capable of remembering a child’s life threatening allergies when they are in your care.
You aren’t responsible for their breakup, but it is concerning that you don’t seem to think what happened was a big deal which her father would rightfully be upset about.

Could this situation have been handled differently, or was it just an unfortunate mistake? How should important precautions, like food allergies, be managed in group settings? Feel free to share your thoughts and opinions in the comments below.