WIBTA to accept inheritance?
A Redditor (40F) shares a dilemma about accepting an inheritance from an extended family member who was once unpleasant but later changed their behavior before passing. While the inheritance would help the user’s own family.
They feel morally torn between keeping the money for their own children or giving it to their sibling’s (Jade’s) kids, who are in greater need due to Jade’s struggles. What would be the right thing to do? Read the original story below…
‘ WIBTA to accept inheritance?’
I (40 f) have recently had an extended family member pass away. Not close at all, would class them as a horrible person up till they were very sick. For some reason they started acting nice(ish). Found out today that I am in the will to some extent as well as my siblings.
One of my older siblings (will call them Jade) was very close to them (they were like pea’s in a rotten pod). Jade is unfortunately affected by costly vices, which has ruined their quality of life as well as affected their children’s lives, who are all still minors.
I know the morally right thing to do would be to pass whatever the inheritance over to Jade’s children, but I have my own kids, and some things happening with life where some extra $$ would make things easier.
WIBTA if I kept some of this money that is a buffer for me vs giving it all to Jades kids that need all the support we can provide? I don’t know the amout. If it’s low, say $3000, I would of course leave it to them. If highish $30000, I would look at dividing.
Here’s the comments of Reddit users:
catskilkid − Why is the morally right thing to disregard the decedent’s wishes and give the inheritance to someone she SPECIFICALLY decided NOT to give the bequest to? Seems if you honor her wishes, there is nothing wrong morally. In fact, don’t see how morality comes into this equation. Once you receive the money, you can do as you wish, but YWNBTA if you accept it and keep it.
LightPhotographer − Why is it morally right to give money to someone who will squander it?
Jazzlike_Property692 − There is no conflict here to judge. It’s your money. Do with it what you want.
lmmontes − Your cousin included you in the will. Accept whatever is given to you. For all you know, she may have left more to your sibling. YWNBTA keeping it.
Sorry-Ad-8804 − Nta keep the money for you and your kids ..
OnlyThePhantomKnows − You would be an a**hole to give a gift away. Your family member made a choice. Jade would just blow the money. If you want to help her children (noble thought) hold the money in trust and tell them you will help them with their education.
Nemesis0408 − YWNBTA. Your relative made their will out that way for a reason. Honour their wishes and keep your share.
Junglepass − You would s**ew your own kids to unscrew another’s person’s kids. You are playing the white knight here.
ElmLane62 − NTA. It doesn’t MATTER that your sister needs the money more or was close to the relative who is leaving you money. It’s YOUR money.
RemoteInvestigator68 − Nta. You and your family come first. It’s not your fault that jade can’t manage her own money. And I feel like if you gave her anything she’d blow in in a heartbeat and then come back for more.
Inheriting money can bring up complex emotions, especially when it involves family members in need. Would it be selfish for the user to keep the inheritance for her own children, or is it more about what would be best for Jade’s kids? How would you handle this dilemma? Share your thoughts below!