WIBTA if I throw all my mother-in-law’s things out of my house after she moved herself in?

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Home is meant to be your sanctuary, a place where you call the shots. But when someone oversteps those boundaries—especially when they repeatedly intrude into your space—it forces you to take decisive action. In this story, a frustrated homeowner recounts how his mother-in-law, previously kicked out for her disruptive behavior, managed to sneak back into his house without permission.

Using a spare key hidden in the garage (left open for charging a car), she moved her belongings into the guest room and settled in without consent. Now, with plans to spend the day off while she’s away at work, he’s considering a bold move: throwing all her things onto the curb or even renting a storage pod for them before changing the locks.

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Though his wife may share his frustrations, the looming reality is that she has nowhere else to go besides her car—and the risk of theft (or even bears) makes the situation even more volatile.

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‘ WIBTA if I throw all my mother-in-law’s things out of my house after she moved herself in?’

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Dr. Laura Markham, a clinical psychologist specializing in family boundaries, explains, “A home is a personal space, and repeated unauthorized access can be very damaging to one’s sense of security. When a family member continually disregards established boundaries, it is both healthy and necessary to enforce consequences to protect your well-being.”

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She continues, “While it might seem extreme to outsiders, in cases like these, taking a firm stand—such as removing unwanted belongings and securing your home—is a form of self-care and a message that your space is not up for grabs.”

Relationship expert Dr. John Gottman adds, “In blended family situations, clear and consistent boundaries are critical. If someone repeatedly uses your home without permission, it disrupts the equilibrium and can lead to long-term resentment. The decision to physically remove belongings and change locks is a practical step towards restoring that balance.”

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Both experts agree that while the proposed action is tough, it is a justified response to ongoing boundary violations that affect the overall harmony and safety of the household.

Let’s dive into the reactions from Reddit:

Several redditors voiced strong support, with one user writing, “If someone keeps sneaking into your house and taking up space without permission, you’re absolutely within your rights to reclaim your home. Boundaries are sacred.”

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Another group shared similar experiences, commenting, “My MIL once did something similar, and setting clear boundaries was the only way to make her understand that my home isn’t a free-for-all. You’re not the asshole for protecting your space.”

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Ultimately, refusing to let your MIL continue to encroach on your home—and taking steps to physically remove her belongings and secure your space—is not an overreaction. You have every right to protect your sanctuary from repeated intrusions, especially when those actions compromise your ability to use your own home.

This case forces us to ask: How do we balance familial obligations with the right to personal space? Is it ever too much to demand that boundaries be respected, even if it means taking drastic action?

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What would you do if you found yourself in a similar situation? Have you ever had to reclaim your space from an overbearing family member? Share your thoughts and experiences below—your insights might help others navigate the delicate balance between family and personal autonomy.

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