WIBTA if I don’t load the dishwasher?

A Redditor faces a frustrating dilemma with their college roommates who habitually leave dirty dishes piled in the sink. Despite not contributing to the mess, they’re being pressured to load the dishwasher for a roommate expecting company. With a final exam looming, they’re torn between standing their ground or complying for the sake of peace. Read the original story below…

‘ WIBTA if I don’t load the dishwasher?’

This may seem like a minor issue, but I need some perspective. I currently live in a college apartment with two other roommates, and we share a kitchen. My concern is that they consistently “forget” to wash their dishes.

I’ve always made a habit of cooking and cleaning my own dishes, but I’m unable to do so anymore since they leave their dirty plates piled up in the sink, causing it to smell and making it difficult for me to cook next to it. As a result, I’ve resorted to living off Doordash.

What frustrates me most is that the dishwasher is right next to the sink—it would take little to no effort to rinse off food bits off and load the dishwasher. I’ve brought this up several times, but they always reassure me they’ll handle it, which never happens.

On one occasion, the sink became so disgusting that maggots started appearing, and I ended up cleaning it because my roommates refused to deal with it. This morning, one of my roommates texted me, asking if I could load the dishwasher for her because her “long-distance talking stage” was coming over.

I was already preoccupied studying for a final exam scheduled for tonight. I replied explaining that none of the dishes were mine, as I only eat takeout. She responded by saying that chores are everyone’s responsibility.

To compromise, I offered to mop the floors instead, but she refused and insisted she didn’t have time to do the dishes, which frustrates me since I had a final exam to prepare for as well. I’ve left her on delivered for now, but I’m wondering, WIBTA if I refuse to load the dishwasher?

Here’s how people reacted to the post:

Comfortable-Ebb4514 −  NTA they’re literally treating you as their maid, chores are for everyone but them 🙄

Apart-Ad-6518 −  NTA. they leave their dirty plates piled up in the sink, causing it to smell. the dishwasher is right next to the sink. On one occasion, the sink became so disgusting that maggots started appearing, and I ended up cleaning it because my roommates refused to deal with it.

Don’t do it. Let them see how lazy, disgusting & slovenly she is. She responded by saying that chores are everyone’s responsibility.. She can start taking some then. You’ve got your exam to study for. Best of luck!

pottersquash −  NTA. Why you offered to mop??

NonaYerBiz −  NTA – our place had a big sign over the sink. “If you dirty it, you clean it. Others aren’t responsible for your mess.” And it worked most of the time. Your roommate doesn’t respect your time. Remember,

“No” is a complete sentence. Don’t cave. She’ll learn that she can’t take advantage of you. You don’t have to be rude, just assertive. “No, I’m not cleaning your dirty dishes. I’m studying. Bye.”

UteLawyer −  NTA. Your roommate says she doesn’t have time? Well, you don’t either. You have a final exam to study for.

Basilsainttsadface −  It depends.  Do you want to be the designated dishwasher?  If so, then yes.  You have 3 choices:  be the dishwasher; set a boundary and enforce it, even if it means maggots; or my suggestion: get out of that place.  Life is too short to have crappy roommates.

Agile-Wish-6545 −  In college, we started throwing away any dishes that were in the sink more than 24 hours. People started cleaning them.

Justmegivingmy2cents −  Don’t convolute things. Yes, everyone does chores not the case in point here with the dishes. “We’re all responsible for our own dishes. I don’t mind chores but not my job to clean up after your used dishes.” is the right way to go.

ExistenceRaisin −  NTA. If your roommate can find time for her date, then she can find time to clean up after herself. If the chores are everyone’s responsibility, then she should be doing her own dishes instead of telling you to clean up her mess

grapefruitviolin −  NTA -your roommates are gross and lazy.. go buy paper plates and throw all of the dishes out lol

Would you stand firm and refuse to clean up after others, or would you help for the sake of harmony? How should shared responsibilities be handled in situations like this? Share your perspective below!