WIBTA for not giving my friends number to a woman I just made out with?
A 30-year-old man made out with a woman named Rachel at a bar, only to have her shift her attention toward his best friend, Joe, right after. Since then, Rachel has repeatedly texted him asking about Joe, which feels disrespectful and uncomfortable.
The user wonders if it would be wrong to withhold Joe’s contact, as Rachel’s behavior feels sleazy. read the original story below…
‘ WIBTA for not giving my friends number to a woman I just made out with?’
The other night I (M30) went to a bar to play pool with my best bud (Joe, M30). As we’re playing, a woman (F35, Rachel) comes up and asks if she can play doubles on the next game with her friend. When they join, she immediately starts flirting very hard with both of us, and vice versa.
At some point, I pull Joe aside and have the “let’s decide who will make the move later” convo, and he says I should go for it. We spend the next hour all flirting, and when we plan to leave I ask for her number and she gives it to me.
Then Rachel suggests we all go back to her place a few blocks away for a nightcap, which we agree to. While there, Rachels friend maneuvers so Rachel and I have a little time to ourselves, we make out, it’s great, she’s really into it lots of laughter and hungry looks, appropriate for a first time.
When we go back outside, she immediately starts flirting with Joe again. I’m not going to lie, it felt a little s**tty to have her flirt with the only other dude there literally 10 seconds after we made out (not to mention my best friend), but I figured it just might be my own insecurity. Soon after, Joe and I leave.
Now here’s the thing. Rachel and I have texted a few times since then, and in every single message she sends, she asks about Joe. First one was asking for both our last names, which definitely felt like she was hoping to look him up and go around me to hook up with my friend.
At this point I’m considering blocking her and moving on. If genders were reversed and a woman friend told a story about making out with a guy at a bar and then he kept asking about her other friend, he would get called a sleazebag.
Part of me thinks shes acting really gross, engaging in behavior I wouldn’t want to reward/encourage, and part of me thinks that it’s just my insecurity. So Reddit. WIBTA if I didn’t give Rachel my friend’s number?
Here’s how people reacted to the post:
FucklePromotion − NTA I’m sorry, it sounds like she’s not into you. And yes, she’s being kind of gross. If she was into him, she shouldn’t have made out with you.
ChildofObama − NTA. It sounds like she’s playing games … and on another hand, I’m pretty sure the general consensus in 2024 is, giving out someone’s number without permission is a privacy violation.
Reaper_Hans_7218 − I see something that none of the others saw in this .There were two girls in this story . Where’s the other one at and why is she not being mentioned at all . I’m not saying that the number was for her at all , in fact , she’s not brought up by Op at all .
Where did she go , and was she doing anything with Ops Bro ? Was she her ( Wing Woman ) or did she doing anything but keep him busy to give them time alone for a reason . Sounds fishy to me . Op , you need to give more Intel on her in this . There’s a reason why she’s I this , but you left her out.. Please respond , , , , ,
TheBerethian − NTA Just block her and move on – you’re saving yourself and your friend from this walking collection of red flags. Nothing would have stopped them handing their numbers to each other if they felt so inclined.
[Reddit User] − I bet she made out with you, decided she didn’t like you that much, you were a bad kisser or something, and decided to try him instead.
CatteNappe − YWNBTA. If nothing else, he may not *want* her to have his number. Next time she texts about it ask her if she’d like you to give him *her* number. And in any case, you should probably back off and move on.
Maybe she’s a sleazebag, maybe she enjoys playing games and racking up “conquests”, but she obviously isn’t available for, or interested in, developing any serious relationship. (I’d give your friend a heads up about that if she does want her number passed along)
Key_Armadillo3975 − How about this take. She wanted, at the least, a three-dimensional. Maybe all 4 of at once. Just sayin.
Kerosene07 − I would just block her and move on. Obviously your buddy wasnt that interested seeing how he told you to make the move. No need to make it a big deal and no need to pass in phone numbers.
Maybe saving both you and your buddy an std. As a female I have never made out with someone and then asked for his friends number. Girl doesn’t have all her wires crossed right and maybe you both dodged a bullet.
panachi19 − NAH. Joe might not want her to have his number. Tell her you’ll give him HER number and he can call her if he’s interested.
She doesn’t owe you some kind of commitment after a make out session or even a hookup.
I say this as a guy whose best friend is insanely good looking and has had numerous women hook up with me to get closer to him or when he was otherwise occupied lol. They weren’t gf material but the ride was fun.
[Reddit User] − Just block her.
Is it fair to block Rachel and refuse to share Joe’s number, or is it just insecurity talking? Share your take below!