WIBTA for asking a kid to pay damages for hitting my car?

A parent is contemplating asking a kid to pay for damages after their bike hit their parked car, leaving a mark. They have security footage showing the incident and believe they can identify the child.

However, they are conflicted due to the nature of accidents involving kids and feel it may seem mean-spirited to pursue compensation for a minor scratch. read the original story below…

‘ WIBTA for asking a kid to pay damages for hitting my car?’

Yesterday morning a kid ran into my car with their bike and left a mark on it. I noticed the mark and checked our security camera, which is how I know what happened. It looks like there were a couple of grade school kids going by, one of them drove one of the younger ones off the side of the road into our car.

I also have grade-school kids going to the same school, we live in a small residential area so it wouldn’t be hard to identify the kid who ran into my car by asking my own kids and looking/asking around.

My husband and I are considering doing so and then asking them to just pay the cost of fixing the damage. WIBTA for pursuing this? The reason I’m not sure if this would be an AH move is 1. our car was parked right on the side of the road, plenty of opportunity for kids and other things to run into it,

2. I have my own kids, I know they’re not always careful and I’m inclined to give some grace for mistakes, and 3. my husband is much more concerned about our car and cars in general than me, I personally don’t even care about a mark or a scratch, so it feels just mean-spirited and arbitrary go after someone for money (my husband feels more strongly).

Here’s the input from the Reddit crowd:

pacazpac −  The kid was run off the road by another kid into your car and you want to go after the poor kid for damages? Yikes. Yeah, YWBTA.

Broad_Respond_2205 −  It looks like there were a couple of grade school kids going by, one of them drove one of the younger ones off the side of the road into our car. Amm is there a reason you aren’t going after the kid that’s actually responsible? YTA just for that.

crypticXmystic −  If after cleaning there are real damages then you ask the parents to pay for it not the kid. Parents should be held responsible for the damages caused by their children.

If they feel it is the responsibility of the older children for driving him off the road then it is their responsibility to then go after them for reimbursement.
However keep in mind that though you may be owed the reimbursement for the damages, claiming it may come with a reputation. What is the cost of the repair? Is it worth it?

Lyrehctoo −  INFO – what exactly dies “left a mark” mean?

KitchenDismal9258 −  NTA but only if you go for the child who deliberately ran the other child into you car. They were the ones that caused the accident.
Of course the kid isn’t going to be able to pay for it but his parents will be liable.

Following through with this might actually show the kid there are consequences for their actions and he’s damn lucky that he didn’t run the other kid into the path of of moving car. But… how much damage is there? Is is obvious or can it be buffed out?

If it can, then I would perhaps only consider speaking to the parents about their child’s behaviour and suggest they pay some restitution towards a fix… but if they brush it off and so no concern for their child’s behaviour then report it to insurance with the relevant footage of the incident and let the cards fall where they may.

Just be mindful about what pull these parents have with other parents and their kids. You don’t want your child ostracised because of what they are saying and doing. No it shouldn’t be like this but sometimes it is.

zombieqatz −  Yta report it to your insurance if you want to but they’re not going to do anything and neither are you.

RGSerpent −  Info – do you know the older child or their parents in some way? Is that why you’d rather go after the innocent younger child than the person who actually caused the incident? You’ve got a video that (from what you’ve written) clearly demonstrates that the younger child was forced into your car.

Do you really think that 1) a parent would agree to paying for something without seeing said video and 2) that after seeing the video where their child was forced into your car they’d be willing to pay for something that wasn’t their child’s fault?

I can only reason that you somehow know the older child or their parents and that’s why you’re going after an innocent (and depending on the relationship between the older and the younger, potentially a child being bullied by an older child) because in what world would you try and blame the younger?. YWBTA

NomadicusRex −  YTA – The accident was not caused by the kid who ran into your car. The bigger kid who drove the younger one into your car is at fault. AND a child isn’t going to have the means to pay. AND you would probably be making your own children pariahs at their school, likely leading to b**lying.

You COULD speak to the parent of the older kid who caused the incident, but I doubt that those parents would be very receptive since their kid didn’t make contact, the littler kid did.

Kaumira −  YTA. absolutely insane

Iliketortlez −  YTA! Get some water and a rag… most likely fixes the tire mark. As I doubt there is physical damage.

Is it fair to ask a child for damages, or should they let it go? What do you think? Share your thoughts below!