When Health Comes First: AITA for Not Sharing My Carefully Planned Meal?

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In a world where food once symbolized care and camaraderie, one woman’s journey toward healthier living has taken an unexpected turn. A devoted cook with a passion for sharing her culinary creations, she now finds herself at a crossroads—balancing her love for food with the strict demands of a personalized nutrition regime. Recently prescribed by her doctor, nutritionist, and trainer, her meals are precisely portioned to help her build muscle and shed excess weight.

At her workplace, where sharing is usually the norm, a simple request to sample her carefully prepared lunch escalated into a confrontation. Her coworker’s demand, followed by insensitive teasing about her eating habits, has sparked a debate on personal boundaries and self-care. The story challenges us to consider when protecting one’s health and personal goals is more important than conforming to social expectations.

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‘AITA for not sharing my meal?’

I am very fat woman in my mid 30s, I love cooking and baking and I love to share. I often bring things to work for people to share. Well I gain 20 kilos last 2 years and I decided I really need to take better care for myself. I found a doctor, nutritionist and trainer few weeks ago and now I am following the regime they set for me.

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I have gluten intolerance, lactose intolerance, egg/seafood/celery allergy so it's not exactly easy to cook for me, but I worked with nutritionist and she has made "menu" for me for every day of a month. With amount of food an everything (calories counted). I spend a lot of time cooking every day and I am bringing food to work with me in Tupperwares.

The thing is that according to the doctor I ate really wrong - I was all the time dieting and I didn't eat enough necessary nutrients. So the nutritionist prescribed me big portions, especially when it comes to proteins, because she wants me to exchange fat for muscles. So to the issue - I brought tupper of salad, some potatoes and meat with sauce to work.

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The meat was cutted in 4-5 pieces to fit into the tupper and when I warmed it up I sat and started to eat. My coworker came to me and asked if she could have one or two pieces of the meat and a bit of potatoes because it smelled heavenly and I always bring cooked stuff to the office. I told her no, that it's my lunch and I have set amount of calories intake, so I am sorry but no.

She looked at me and told me I don't need this big portion and I should share with her, because it would help me. I told her sorry, but no and kept eating. She scoffed and left me alone, but since than she and her "work BF" keep making fun of me for eating like a pig.

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And that it s not very effective weight losing since I am still fatty. So AITA? For all the people with terrible need to give me health and weight loss advice. Keep it to yourselves, I am taken care of by professionals. THANKS!. Edit: I am not gonna send anybody photo of my body. Please stop DMing me.

Adopting a strict nutritional plan can be a transformative yet challenging process. In this case, the OP’s commitment to her health regime is commendable. By following professional advice, she aims to reverse years of inconsistent dieting and achieve a balanced intake of nutrients. Her carefully measured meals are not only a part of her journey to build muscle and lose weight but also a personal celebration of self-care. Honoring personal dietary needs is an important aspect of overall well-being.

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In many workplaces, sharing food is a common and friendly gesture. However, when personal health goals are involved, the expectation to share can become intrusive. Maintaining control over one’s meal can be vital for managing calorie intake and ensuring the precise nutritional balance prescribed by a specialist.

As nutrition expert Dr. Michael Greger puts it, “Individualized diets are designed with specific metabolic needs in mind, and deviating from them may undermine progress.” This underscores that personal food choices are deeply connected to one’s health journey.

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Furthermore, the delicate nature of dietary restrictions—with allergies to gluten, lactose, eggs, seafood, and celery—adds complexity to her meal planning. The care and effort invested in preparing a meal that meets all these needs cannot be underestimated. When someone asks to share, it dismisses the effort and jeopardizes the precision required for her nutritional balance. The need to manage portion size for optimal health becomes not only a personal right but also a non-negotiable element of her treatment.

Additionally, psychological well-being plays a crucial role when embarking on a health journey. Experiencing unwarranted criticism at work for sticking to a prescribed nutritional plan can lead to stress and self-doubt. In such cases, reinforcing personal boundaries helps maintain the mental resilience necessary for achieving long-term goals. Healthy change is often met with resistance from those who misunderstand the significance of individual nutrition plans, and it is important for the OP to remember that her well-being is paramount.

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Ultimately, creating a respectful dialogue in shared environments is key. Whether through a direct conversation with coworkers or by involving HR if necessary, advocating for personal health boundaries can foster a more considerate workplace culture. The central message remains: when it comes to personal health and nutrition, the decision of what to eat is a private one, rooted in professional guidance and individual needs.

See what others had to share with OP:

The Reddit community overwhelmingly supports the OP’s stance. Many applaud her for prioritizing professional guidance over casual sharing in the workplace, while others share similar experiences of feeling pressured to compromise on personal health goals. Several commenters express outrage at the entitlement shown by her coworkers, with some even recommending that she report such behavior to HR. The consensus is clear: personal food choices, especially those tied to health and well-being, are not up for debate.

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Guilty-Tie164 − NTA. Does your company have an HR department that you can report them to for harassment and hostile work environment?

ScoobaChick28 − NTA. First of all, you have been “prescribed“ these meals from a nutritionist and your doctor. But even if she didn’t know that, it’s not your duty to share whatever food you have with whoever asks. you should not even have to explain this. NO Is a full sentence. Beyond that, the fact that they tell you that you eat like a pig, or “make fun” of you is so far beyond what is acceptable, that you really need to take this to HR. Pronto!

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4games1 − NTA. It took you years to put the weight on, and it will take you years to take the weight off, follow your program, and just stick to your no.

DueIsland2983 − Of course you're NTA it takes some nerve to ask, much less demand, that someone share their lunch. You make a nice lunch for yourself; even without the issues surrounding your diet there is NO REASON for you to share with casual workplace acquaintances.

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Unless you work in a very tiny office you'd have none for yourself if you shared with \*everyone\*. It doesn't matter if you're fat, skinny, losing weight, or gaining weight; your food is your food. You aren't the office caterer.

[Reddit User] − NTA. I hear you. I was eating wrong for many years and also piled on the weight. It was only after I tested for intolerances, started intermittent fasting and counted calories that I came to the realization that I was, indeed, not eating enough. Eg. For dinner, I had to plate up 100-200g of lean protein (depending on the source) a small potato and bulk up to rest of my plate to reach approx.

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500 calories for that meal. When I finished loading my plate I thought WHOA that's a lot of food. However, eating correct portions and/or nutrient dense foods meant I was not getting hungry as often and this led to me consuming less calories per day.

Your co-worker is an AH. First, who the f&%k asks a co-worker for their food? I've been working for a really long time and I have never asked or had a coworker ask for my food. If it wasn't offered, you stuck to your own lunch.. Report the cow to HR or your manager. This type of behavior is not on.

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Revolutionary_Ad1846 − NTA. She is not entitled to your food. She is rude to ask and then rude to mock you.. Kudos to you for seeking help! Wishing you much success and drive for your weight loss.

Ok_Smile9222 − YTA for obvious reasons. You should never ever warm up anything that smells good without being willing to feed anyone else in the office, or frankly in the neighborhood you live in. It's extremely selfish. You should also cook enough for everyone around. Nutritionists are just c**spiracy theorists and you should never listen to them! (Obviously NTA, your coworkers suck)

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overlytiredmum − NTA. Good on you for looking after your health! They aren't a medical professional so I would ignore them. Trust your team and their advice to get you to your goals. If you do feel that their advice might be wrong. Talk to them a out it or seek a second opinion.. Your colleague is just immature and mean.. Best of luck!

[Reddit User] − NTA. People aren't entitled to your food just cause they ask. I swear I don't understand this office culture or workroom culture where people feel they're entitled to your food. She can easily bring her own food in, or order something \[if your office allows that.\] And if she's going to react like that because she didn't share your food, she is a massive a**hole \[I mean a**hole is a nice name for her tbh,\]. Could you report her and her little sidekick to HR?

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Striking_Heron2800 − NTA. I’m over 60 and have never been asked to share my lunch at work because it smells good. Who does this?

In conclusion, the situation highlights a modern dilemma: balancing the culture of sharing with the necessity of maintaining personal health. When food is tailored to meet specific nutritional needs, every bite counts. The OP’s decision to adhere strictly to her dietary plan is not only a reflection of her commitment to health but also a rightful assertion of personal boundaries.

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What do you think? Where should the line be drawn between generosity and self-care, especially when professional advice is involved? Share your thoughts and experiences—how do you navigate personal health priorities in a culture that values sharing?

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