What to do after a failed proposal? Now I (28 M) live awkwardly with my girlfriend (27 F)

A man (28M) shares the heartbreak of proposing to his girlfriend (27F), only to have her express doubts about their relationship during the proposal. Stuck with an expensive, non-returnable engagement ring and feelings of resentment, he wonders if their relationship is salvageable or if it’s time to move on. Read his full story below.

‘ What to do after a failed proposal? Now I (28 M) live awkwardly with my girlfriend (27 F)’

My girlfriend and I have been together for 2 years and six months ago, she asked me to propose to her within sixth months, which I did. During this time she hinted heavily that she wanted an engagement ring with particular stones that were difficult to come by at a regular jeweler, so I had to buy it from Glamira.

It ended up costing more than $ 500, which was more than I wanted to spend, but I was so sure she was going to be my spouse that I could stretch my budget since she appreciates it so much when she gets something she loves, and this ring was perfect.

The time comes and I propose, I do all sorts of lovely s**t and creative stuff to make it a perfect proposal and she accepts before starting to cry as she reveals she is unsure if she loves me because her job has been so stressful lately and she her feelings had developed since telling me she wanted to be engaged.

It hit me like a brick wall and I thought my life was pretty much over. We had a week’s break before getting back together to try a second time. Things are working out somewhat fine, but we’re not at the point we were in the past, that is pretty clear.

Now I was going to return the ring as it wasn’t engraved or anything, but now Glamira’s f**king return policy fucks me in the ass telling me I can’t return it because a piece of f**king paper is cut on the ring.

Everything was returned including the box and all certificates, but the paper that was attached to the ring was removed temporarily in the proposal and I now I won’t get to return it. I get very pissed off at the world by wanting to be alone and not talk since I’ve essentially lost 500 bucks on a worthless ring that I can’t use for anything.

What sucks so much is that I bought it because the woman I love told me it was the thing she wanted the most in the world. Now I’m afraid I’m going to resent her for making me waste so much. She simply said: That sucks, and carried on with her day.

I feel like it’s very unfair for me to take the hit when she changed her mind without hinting or telling me. Do you guys think this relationship is just doomed to fail at this point or is it worth trying to mend it?

Am I being unreasonable for thinking I shouldn’t be responsible for taking the 500 bucks loss alone? And is Glamira the worst jewelry company in the world?

See what others had to share with OP:

New_Arrival9860 −  Pawn the ring, $500 is nothing compared to the cost of marrying the wrong person. Job stress does not cause someone to loose feeling for a significant other.. Find yourself a new place to live.

NArcadia11 −  I’m sorry you’re going through this, I’ll answer your questions as you’ve asked them. Do you guys think this relationship is just doomed to fail at this point or is it worth trying to mend it?

Unfortunately, yes I think the relationship is over. You proposed and she said she’s not sure if she loves you. I don’t see you guys coming back from that, especially because it doesn’t sound like y’all communicate well at all. Has she explained why she feels this way or how her feelings have changed?

Or what specific things would need to change for her to want to marry you? I dunno, I would just call it a loss and break up rather than drag this out tbh. Am I being unreasonable for thinking I shouldn’t be responsible for taking the 500 bucks loss alone? And is Glamira the worst jewelry company in the world?

I think you gotta let this $500 go man. I know it’s a good bit of money, but it doesn’t really matter in the grand scheme of things. It really sounds like you’re more upset at the cost of the ring than at the fact that your gf said she doesn’t love you. Or maybe you’re just focusing on the ring because it’s easier to deal with.

But at the end of the day, you can make $500 again. It’s not worth spending all this time being angry about. Also, engagement rings are almost never returnable. That’s the standard in the market. So it’s not a Glamira thing. Focus on dealing with your relationship, and then when things have calmed down you can try and resell it on Ebay or something.

actualchristmastree −  I think you’re using the cost of the ring as the target for your anger and disappointment bc you don’t want to put that on your girlfriend

TroublesomeTurnip −  Your focus is on the money and not as much on repairing the relationship which is confusing. A rejected proposal would be a relationship k**ler for me. You can resell the ring, oh well. But your resentment and her lack of communication, doesn’t bode well.

swigbar −  Your focus on the $500 is very strange considering your circumstances. you mentioned the money so many times and you don’t even mention your own feelings. $500 is not that much money for an engagement ring… it is definitely not a lot of money to learn a valuable lesson. What lesson is it up to you…

Lioriel24 −  500 bucks or be unhappy the entire marriage? I cant understand at all whats the loss 😅 theres no pawn shops so you can recover any $$$ invested? obviously the time wont, but you will heal and need to consider only was 2 1/2 years, not a lot of wasted years 😅

FrumpusMaximus −  why tf do you want to marry someone who. is unsure if she loves me because her job has been so stressful lately and she her feelings had developed since telling me she wanted to be engaged. seems like a terrible investment to me

Tapeworm_III −  “Propose to me!”. “Will you marry me?”. “No.” I think the relationship is done, dude.

princessro123 −  if you’re this worked up over $500(which is already extremely inexpensive for an engagement ring) i dont think you are ready to get married. if you’re resentful over a ring you chose to buy, what will happen if she falls sick and can’t work for a period of time?

or needs time off to heal after having kids? i was surprised by your age, because this reads like a 19 year old is trying to get married without thinking things through.

FullFrontal687 −  Ye$, I feel like the relation$hip with Glamira will never recover from thi$ return policy betrayal. (This sounds like more of a jewelry store experience than a relationship advice request.)

Navigating the aftermath of a failed proposal is emotionally taxing, especially when financial strain and unspoken expectations add to the tension. Should this man fight to mend the cracks in his relationship, or accept that they may not be compatible long-term? What would you do in his shoes? Share your thoughts below!