[UPDATE]: Should I (33F) tell my ex’s (28M) girlfriend that he pathetically contacted me?

A Reddit user shared an update about her decision to inform her ex’s current girlfriend that he had contacted her. After being approached by her ex twice, she reached out to his girlfriend to share the information.

Choosing to repay the courtesy shown to her in the past. Their interaction was civil and concise, leaving the Redditor feeling at peace with her choice. Read the original story below.

For those who want to read the previous part: https://aita.pics/xSHIn

‘ [UPDATE]: Should I (33F) tell my ex’s (28M) girlfriend that he pathetically contacted me?’

Sorry for the delayed update for anyone that was interested, but I moved and life has been hectic. I read every comment on the original post and considered every option. A couple weeks after my ex initially contacted me via email, he sent me a text message asking if I would ever talk to him again.

Like before, I didn’t respond. A couple days after I moved, I messaged his gf/the previous “other woman” on Facebook since that was my only form of contact with her. I first asked if they were together, to which she responded “yes” a couple days later.

In a brief conversation I told her that I felt I owed her the courtesy since she once extended the same to me. I told her he had contacted me twice in the last month and gave her the gist of his email. She said she figured that’s why I was contacting her, said she really appreciated me telling her,

thanked me, and said she hoped I was doing well. I told her good luck and went on my merry way. No catfighting, no unnecessary chatting. In the end, I feel bad for her.

Yeah, she made the horrible decision to get back with him but I’m sure she did hoping/thinking he had changed. He never will. Men like that don’t. I was his unwitting fool for nearly 5 years, now she has that burden.

I haven’t heard from him since or heard anything from his family who still occasionally keep in touch as to whether she dumped him or not…my gut instinct is she didn’t. Either way, my conscience is clear, a “favor” has been returned, and I’m still happily no longer with a c**ater. Cheers folks!. ​

Check out how the community responded:

Balcil −  I am glad you did that, because I would like someone to tell me if my SO was cheating on me or looking for other people to date.

[Reddit User] −  You did the right thing.

KittyChama −  You did the right thing. I hear from others it’s no one’s business but frankly, with solid proof, I would like someone to tell me my partner is cheating. She did it for you so it’s good to return the courtesy. I hope she comes around and realizes it’s better to leave him and not waste anymore time on him.

homeoplasmine −  I remember your post! You managed this well. I hope for her sake she sees the light eventually.

[Reddit User] −  Happy to hear there was no hard feelings between you and the other girl. Ive been cheated on and the other woman was n**ty to me. :[

doitnowplease −  Absolutely. You did the right thing. If more women looked out for each other I feel like men like this wouldn’t get away with half of what they do. Keep looking out for your sisters ladies. ❤️

bladerunnet263 −  I had an experience like that years ago. The girl messaged me on Facebook freaking out. They’d been dating very seriously. We’d been casually sleeping together and old friends.

I quickly calmed her down and befriended her. We vented a bunch for a week. Then she decided she had to stay with him. I said cool see ya! She was a self admitted d**ma queen.

Bella_Anima −  I think if all women in these kinds of situation handled it as respectfully and wisely as the two of you did, this sub would be empty.. You did great, keep being amazing.

Chantelle-xo −  Guys like this dont ever change. They just find new ways to add false hope with different promises. Sneakier and wiser is generally all that happens. If you’re not important enough for him to value your relationship and cheat, it’s not going to change when he gets caught.

littlepearlisland −  Yay! You did the right thing, I would have wanted to know if I was in her shoes. Though I never understood how the ‘other woman’ would want to be with a man they know is not above cheating. (TBH a small part of me wished it had turned Jerry Springer just because I like the chanting…. But thankfully glad it didn’t)

Do you think the Redditor handled the situation well by informing the girlfriend? Would you have approached it differently, or do you agree with her decision to focus on her fresh start? Share your thoughts below!