UPDATE: My (26F) Husband’s (26M) family keeps referring to me as his “best friend”. What does this mean?

The update to this puzzling family dynamic reveals shocking revelations. The original poster (26F) learned through her husband (26M) that his family’s habit of referring to her as his “best friend” was part of a cruel bet about the longevity of their marriage.

This revelation, shared by the father-in-law during a drunken conversation, led to a heated confrontation with the mother-in-law and sister-in-law, unraveling their motivations and causing a major rift in the family. Read the full update for details on how the couple is navigating this betrayal.

For those who want to read the previous part: https://aita.pics/IQmgF

‘ UPDATE: My (26F) Husband’s (26M) family keeps referring to me as his “best friend”. What does this mean?’

Thanks to everyone who offered helpful advice, and to those who have been kind in sharing their own experiences. I’m sorry to hear that this is not exactly a unique experience. Unfortunately for my relationship with Robbie’s family, s**t has hit the fan.

Yesterday afternoon, Robbie and I were invited over to his parent’s house for dinner. I have a big project due this week at work, so I needed to stay home and wrap it up. I told Robbie to go catch up with his family while I order a pizza.

Apparently, this is when Robbie decided he was going to “set things straight” and figure out why his mom and sister keep referring to me as his “best friend”. Please keep in mind that I’m telling this story based on the details that my husband has given me.

Robbie had a normal dinner with his folks, but they were all drinking a bit more than usual. Robbie decided to bring over some scotch that one of his groomsmen gave him for a wedding gift, so him and his dad were especially “loose”.

Robbie and his dad tend to have guy time together after dinners where they hang out in his dad’s garage and talk about car stuff and projects at home/work. This is where Robbie confronted his dad about the whole situation.

From what I can tell, it took some coaxing to get this information out of FIL, but eventually he admitted to Robbie that my MIL and SIL and him were all in on some sort of “bet” as to how long mine and Robbie’s marriage was going to last.

FIL bet that we would stay together, whereas MIL bet less than one year, and SIL bet less than 6 months. Apparently there was a cash prize involved. I don’t really want to know how much it was.

FIL admitted that he believes the whole “best friend” moniker was a way to get under my skin and cause doubts about my relationship with Robbie and his family. They think that if they acted like it was a non-issue for long enough, that it would drive me crazy and start making me angry at Robbie for not intervening.

Robbie then says he stormed into the house to confront his mom about this all. It ended in a screaming match between Robbie, MIL, and FIL. Robbie eventually stormed out and walked to a nearby gas station, and from there he called me for a ride since he couldn’t drive.

This morning, when I drove Robbie back to get his car, we had a horribly awkward confrontation with his parents. MIL is apparently PISSED at FIL for betraying the secret, and they were fighting about it all night.

FIL will be staying with us in our extra bedroom for a couple days, or until they can calm down and talk to each other again. Robbie is now set on going no-contact with his mom and sister. He is angry with his father but is more willing to forgive him.

Personally I would prefer if we saw a family therapist before doing this, but we are still ironing out the details. Hopefully we can get through this with both marriages intact.

Take a look at the comments from fellow users:

Mother_Assumption925 −  Good on him and wtf is wrong with the women in his family. I tell newly weds all the time, take things their friends, family and coworkers say with a grain of salt because you dont know what agenda they are really working and its often not really for your best interests.

notsoreligiousnow −  Wow. Listen. If your husband is set on going NC with his mom and sister, respect his decision. You seem like you’re trying to play peacemaker but they have horribly disrespected you and your marriage. What they did was all kinds of fucked up.

Even FIL is an AH for his part in it even if he was the only one on your side (sort of). Family therapy only works and helps if all parties involved are willing to try but it frankly sounds like the women hate you, want you gone and will never give you or your marriage a chance.

Myaseline −  While the way they’re treating you is a**orrent and not something I would do to a stranger or even someone I dislike, it’s a whole nother level of messed up to try to sabotage their son’s/brother’s marriage on purpose. What kind of monster actively tries to wreck their family member’s life to win a bet? Gross

OptionInteresting291 −  It’s f**king crazy. His family is HORRIBLE!!!!

WeeklyConversation8 −  So his family doesn’t like you and have been trying to break you up. I bet there’s someone his Mom and sister want him to be with. Someone they decided is more suitable for him/they see him with. Going NC is the only way to go. They are horrible people and a threat to your marriage.

wigglepie −  INFO: Having reread your first post, you mentioned how you and MIL both work in the same industry. After this revelation, do you think she’d attempt to cause harm to your reputation/employment, if she hasn’t already?

WrastleGuy −  I’d be cutting the mom and sister off forever.  Tell them you have a bet to not talk to them ever again and neither of you want to lose.

ScaryButterscotch474 −  Thanks for updating. The bet was surprising. I thought FIL was going to reveal that MIL and SIL dislike you. A bet with a cash prize is a whole new level of dislike.

agreensandcastle −  Support your husband’s choices on this matter. These people were trying to sabotage your marriage. Actively. You don’t need them in your life. How could you ever trust them? Support your husband.