[Update] I [20M] am destroying my life and i’m having a hard time changing my behavior

A Redditor (23M) provides an update on his journey of self-improvement after a difficult period in his life. He shares that after two years of feeling broken, he returned to studying something he was passionate about, earning his diploma in BTS (a French vocational diploma).

While he remains friends with his ex-girlfriend, who is now in a relationship with someone else, he feels at peace with the situation. He also obtained his driver’s license and is pushing for more in his career. He expresses gratitude for the supportive comments he received in the past. Read the full story below.

‘ [Update] I [20M] am destroying my life and i’m having a hard time changing my behavior’

Hey, It’s been a while, and i know nobody remembers me but whatever. So i’m 23 yo now, and a lot has changed, after my last post, i spent the next 2 years doing nothing because i was broken.

I went back to study something i loved this year and got my diploma (BTS in France if you care, it’s not much but it’s alright.), and i’m now gonna push for more since i loved this year very much.

My ex-girlfriend ended up dating someone else richer and more handsome than me, but whatever. We’re still friends tho, being the only woman on earth who has ever made me laugh. I did not date anyone else since, most women i thought i had a good feeling with did not find me attractive so i didn’t push.

Well all in all, it’s alright, i got my driver license too, your past comments ended up being useful for me in a way, even if i acted 2 years later. Sorry for the typos i’m not fluent enough in english.

Tldr: I’m doing better career-wise.

Edit : I’m reading all your messages you are all very kind, I chose to respond to your comments with my main account “Limanys” because I don’t care if my friends see my posts now. Thank you all

Here’s the feedback from the Reddit community:

yeahdasme −  I’m proud of you. You identified a problem and you made the change to better yourself, even if it took you a while to get going. You got this friend.

lfernandes −  Bruh, I *remember* your original post. I’m so, so proud of you. If you don’t hear it from anyone else, know that you’ve made someone on this big ole planet proud of you.

Ricksancheez132 −  Just remember, life is not a sprint, it’s a marathon. You need to go at your own pace. I speak from experience of making a s**t ton of my own mistakes. I didn’t figure out what I wanted to do till I was 22 but graduated at 25 with a bunch of guys who were mostly around the same age and the same situation and we’ve been close for almost 12 years…

I’d say focus on your mental and physical health. You are in the years of your life that can lay some serious foundation for the man you want to be. Nothing comes overnight but you are making steps in the right direction. Start making friends with people, even making small talk. That way you can build your confidence and become more social.

sweadle −  I know attractiveness DOES matter, but I want to say that I date men of all levels of attractiveness, but I will not date someone who is unhappy or depressed and not getting treatment. I have had to work so, so hard to be okay, and find my own happiness, and pull myself out of my own depression, that I can feel someone else’s pulling me back.

So your looks may have less to do with the women being uninterested than with your overall outlook on life and how you feel about who you are and what you can offer them. I know others have said it, but I think therapy could be something that helps you.

(Also, 23 is so, so young. If, at 23, you have been able to find something to study that you love, and get a diploma, and have a good friend who cares about you, you’re doing pretty well)

I_lUv_big_tiddies −  Force à toi mec, c’est un peu bateau, mais t’es ta propre limite. Taff à fond mais oublie pas de te laisser le temps de profiter des trucs qui te bottent. Bon courage gros.

ohmoimarie −  Only one woman your entire life has made you laugh? That seems strange, but glad you’re doing well!

bewildered_forks −  Congrats for what you’ve already accomplished! You have so much more in front of you. And you have plenty of time to find a life partner….. I was 30 when I met my husband, and I was very single before then.

peaceoutsis −  Your English has improved a lot. Congratulations on moving on. Keep it up!

Thedumpsterbb −  It sounds like you’ve got this, even if you don’t know it. Keep pushing to do what you love and be proud of how far you have come.

M4Mons −  Congratulations! Things take time. I got my license at 25. I haven’t finished any formal qualifications. Everyone goes at their own pace. You’re doing great 🙂 There are also minimal typos in your post so, well done for your English skills too!

It’s inspiring to see how small steps forward can lead to big changes. Have you ever had a turning point in your life where you chose to take charge of your future? Share your thoughts below!