Update – AITA for refusing to take care of my wife since she caught the flu from having s** with her affair partner ?
A Redditor shares their painful dilemma after discovering that their wife, Victoria, had an affair with a family friend, Zachary. Despite the betrayal and the emotional turmoil, the Redditor is faced with a moral choice when Victoria catches the flu and expects care. With their children supporting divorce, the Redditor seeks validation for their decision to refuse to care for their wife during her illness. Read the original story below to delve deeper into this complex situation.
‘Â Update – AITA for refusing to take care of my wife since she caught the flu from having s** with her affair partner ?’
The answer was obvious but I needed other people to tell me so I didn’t stupidly go back to my wife. Thank you for those who commented on the 1st post. I had made 2 edits on the 1st post explain some stuff that happened after I posted. To just briefly touch on those edits, Zach’s wife and my adult kids know that my wife Victoria had an affair with Zachary.
Zach’s wife kicked him out of their house. All kids are on my side and they want us to divorce. I talked to a friend who’s a major divorce attorney for the 3rd time. I’ve given her a lot of the evidence so she can decide what we can use. She did say that I should be care with what I say online, especially I used Victoria’s and Zachary’s real names.
Our kids, especially our eldest daughter, are pressuring their mom to make this a quick and easy divorce. A lot of people who commented said I was being too nice to my cheating wife. I’ll show some pettiness by letting everyone here mock all the excuses and minimizations she made for her cheating.. >Menopause made her crazy.. >She felt fat and u**y.
>She felt like she didn’t deserve me.. >Zachary came on to her first.
>She wanted to make sure a man can be attracted to her without him being obligated to because she’s the mother of his children.
>She had s** with Zachary to make sure she can still have s**.
>Zachary didn’t mean anything to her.
>I’m overreacting because Zachary is a family friend, and not a family member.
>Zach’s wife isn’t like a daughter to us, she didn’t betray a woman that’s like a daughter to us.
>Other husbands have forgave their wives when the wives cheat.
>If I had s** with a younger woman during a mid-life crisis, she would have forgave me.. >We have 4 kids.. >We’ve been together for so long.
>I promised to love her in sickness and in health.
Heres the input from the Reddit crowd:
xanif − She felt like she didn’t deserve me. I mean…
BlueGreen_1956 − NTA. Not now, not then. She tried every excuse in the book, so she didn’t have to take accountability for her own actions. Oops! I did it again. I used the A word on Reddit. I apologize in advance to those members of the Reddit brigade who get triggered when “accountability” is mentioned.
beautyyyflora − You are not the a**hole; prioritizing your own well-being and refusing to care for your wife after her affair is a reasonable response to her betrayal and lack of accountability.
Away-Understanding34 − Her excuses are disgusting. Good for you for seeing through her BS. Menopause doesn’t make you cheat. If she felt fat and u**y then that’s sometimes to work out in therapy or with you.Â
HK-2007 − NTA. I’m menopausal. That’s a pretty idiotic excuse for cheating. If anything, menopause lowers your libido. My body has experienced a whole lot of changes that I absolutely hate. My mindset isn’t the greatest either but I’d never cheat on my husband.
DesperateToNotDream − It’s interesting how she’s refusing to aknowledge any harm she did to the other wife
FragrantOpportunity3 − Menopause makes just about every woman gain weight especially in the stomach. I went through about 13 years ago. Never cheated on my husband.
FasterThanNewts − Menopause doesn’t make women cheat. Being a lying, moral-less cheating a**hole does. NTA
lovelycamelia − You’re not the a**hole for refusing to care for your wife after her affair, especially given the betrayal and the emotional impact it’s had on you; prioritizing your own well-being and setting boundaries is completely justified in this situation.
JadieJang − Funny she remembered the “in sickness and in health” part, but forgot the “forsaking all others” part.
Do you think the Redditor is justified in refusing to care for his wife after her betrayal, or should he uphold his vows despite the circumstances? How would you handle a situation where trust has been shattered in a relationship? Share your thoughts below!
