My wife cheating on our 10 year anniversary

A Redditor shared the heart-wrenching story of discovering his wife cheating on him during their 10th wedding anniversary. Despite being blindsided, he wants to save their marriage and is seeking advice on how to approach the conversation and work through his emotions. Read the original story below.

‘ My wife cheating on our 10 year anniversary’

My (35m) wife (35f) and I were married ten years ago yesterday. She has been working on a big project for the last few months. The last 4 weeks or so she has been putting in extra time, staying late going in early, to finish up by deadline. This is a career maker for her. I work construction.

With the rain we have had we have crazy hours trying to make up time that we missed. So I work 12 hrs on the days its nice, sometimes a little longer. If its raining when I get up I dont go in. Somedays we get sent home when it starts, too dangerous. I usually hit the gym for an hour or two.

Thursday we started at 6am ,midmorning starts to rain hard. We go home. I go to the gym as usual. I cut the workout short and head downtown to see wife Mehgan, to give her flowers and make plans for dinner that night if possible. We really havent seen much of each other this week.

I went to bed about 9pm she wasnt home, called earlier me she is working late. Not unusual for past month. I stopped and got some flowers and went into her building about 12:30. Nichole was at the receptionist desk. I told her I got here later than I wanted could she put the flowers on Mehgans desk.

She said “I dont think they went to lunch yet why not drop them off yourself?” She buzzed the door to get back to the offices. The place was deserted. I went to her office, the door was closed . I always walk in unless the receptionist tells me she is in a meeting. I walk in some guy is standing behind her nuzzling her neck, she is reaching back over his head.

She is giggling only as she can. Saying”we got to get this done”. I am gut punched. I slammed the flowers down said “Happy Anniversary” and walked out. I didnt hear what she said just went past Nichole said goodbye and left. Made it to elevators and out the building then my phone started ringing.

I balled my eyes out all the way home. Went into garage pulled my camping gear out of the rafters and took off. I drove about 2 hours to a State Park. I had no idea what to do . I just had to run. I hiked a trail we have been on in the past about a 3 hour hike. I dont drink much so I had no booze, I just sat there thinking.

Looking back I am glad I was in a rush, normally I bring a 45cal. With me camping, we have black bears, which generally scare off, but get aggressive if hungary or cubs around. The way I was feeling I might have ate the barrel that night. My phone was blowing up fom Mehgan so I had turned it off.

I left the park to get reception turned it on to see my good friend called. I called him back. He said Meghan called him to check on me, make sure I didnt do anything stupid. We talked a bit, told him I got to think this thru, would catch up on Friday.

So while I am thinking about this, I go over our marriage from the beginning to see what I missed. We come from completely opposite backgrounds. My Grandfather raised me with my mom. He taught me about life. He had a little saying about everyhing. He told me marriage would be the hardest job ZI ever had, you had to work on it everyday.

God I miss him. We did not have much,heard mom and grandpa having many discussions about bills. They worked hard and my brother and I did not miss out on anything we knew of. Mehgan was born into money. Not overly rich but very comfortable. Went to a great college, always great clothes, new car etc. And she is beautiful 11/10 beautiful.

I would joke with her if she coughed about the silver spoon getting stuck in her throat. We met hit off started dating. I was dumbfounded how such a woman would ever be with me. We dated quite awhile before she told me about her parents and life style.

Our friends called us the model couple, because they thought we were so good looking we had to be models. Families were not as kind, afraid of the differences economically would come into play. Her dad and I started to get along but her my mom took some convincing.

She graduates gets her first job, we plan on getting married. We work out between us that we would expose each other to our lives that we live. I took her white water rafting, she took me to the symphony, we went ziplining, we went to an art opening etc. We agreed we had to experience the others interests.

She was really enthused about the more physical things we did. I kinda like the symphony and such. I own two tuxes now. I look back and do not see any red flags. Her first two jobs she quit because the men all tried to get in her pants. She was paraded out in front for photo ops. Invited to conferences when other newbies were not.

At dinner at a conference a partner tried to get her drunk, then tried to force himself into her room that night. She quit, the next job the same thing, quit again . This 3rd job has women as some of the partners and none of that bs is in her workplace. She seems very happy. We seemed very happy.

So now, Friday, I am home. I called her. Asked where she was, back at work. I being in a smartass mood said that the marriage is taking second place to her job. She responded since I would not talk what was she to do? Fair enough. She will be home in an hour. So I wait. I want to save our marriage. If I am lacking in providing then I want to fix it.

I want to ask why of course but I can not accept a IDK answer. How do I phrase this? What else should I be asking? I know I will get all emotional and forget everything so over the next few days we will be going over and over this. What she did is wrong but please no degrading comments, she is still my wife. Thank you in advance.

Here’s the input from the Reddit crowd:

[Reddit User] −  I think the receptionist knew and wanted you to see something she’s had to witness many times.

vulfin_off −  That receptionist is the real bro here. She knew what was going on.

old_gold_mountain −  DO. NOT. BLAME. YOURSELF.

Ididitagaintifu −  Holy crap. I can not imagine walking in on something like that while your mood is sky high because of the anniversary. My friend you are on the right path. Do not accept “I dont know.” You are not at fault. Ask what SHE is going to do to fix this. If she wants to fix it. I feel for you. Please update.

[Reddit User] −  she is still my wife. You know, I don’t think she is. You can get divorced now or you can get divorced later, but this is no longer a “till d**th do us part” marriage.

joells101 −  What she is about to do, is what i refer to as damage control. She’ll try to minimise the situation, 1st time it happened, only touching/kissing nothing else, maybe even try to play it off like it was an unwanted advance..

point is whatever she tells you is unlikely to be the truth or at the very least not the whole truth. All that matters is are you willing to move past this, can you forgive her? If yes than work toward that, ask what she plans to do to fix this and then let her know how you feel.

ITworksGuys −  I want to save our marriage. If I am lacking in providing then I want to fix it. Why? Why are you blaming yourself for someone else’s actions? What is she possibly going to say to make it okay? She isn’t at home worried sick about you, she is back at work with that dude nuzzling her neck again.

You’ve been played dude. She isn’t even sorry. Go talk to a lawyer man, f**k her and her b**lshit. At dinner at a conference a partner tried to get her drunk, then tried to force himself into her room that night. She quit, the next job the same thing, quit again.

This 3rd job has women as some of the partners and none of that bs is in her workplace. If a pattern keeps repeating itself you have to look at the constant variable, which is your wife.

KevinHarringtonAMA −  Brother.. You sound like a man. Men treat themselves with respect. No woman is worth this. If you don’t have kids, leave.

Saywhat227 −  She’s been f**king around on you, for who knows how long. She didn’t come to you out of guilt and confess – she got caught red handed. She’s garbage, dude. She’s not the one.

Divorce her and find someone who’s not a cheating scumbag. Nothing good can come from forgiving her and staying with her. You will never be able to trust her again, because she’s not a trustworthy person.

_random_username69 −  Dude she cheated on you, was she actually working late or just fooling around? At the very least talk to a divorce lawyer so you have a plan if things dont work out.. Don’t be her doormat.