My son’s ex invited herself, her new boyfriend, and his kid to Christmas.

A Redditor shared their frustration over their son’s ex inviting herself, her new boyfriend, and his child to their family Christmas celebration. The ex has been demanding and critical, but this unexpected move left the family questioning whether they’re obligated to accept the situation just to see their grandson. Read the full story below.

‘ My son’s ex invited herself, her new boyfriend, and his kid to Christmas. ‘

My son dated her for a couple of years and she got pregnant. They were going to get married and have a family. I didn’t like her all that much, but I learned to love her because my son loved her and she was going to be part of our family. As soon as she got pregnant, she broke up with him and started talking to him about child support.

She essentially broke his heart and was now demanding money and severely restricting his access to his son once he was born. I don’t have a problem with the child support, and he has paid it but he has a low paying job so he can’t pay more than that. We have done the best we could supporting her with things she needed for the baby.

I particularly drove the 45 minutes one way every Friday to take him so that she would have a break and then drive him home. As well as buying things for her as she needed them like diapers or formula and was very happy to help out. Her mother constantly berates my son and me to anyone who will listen.

Every time my son or I dropped him off, she had a complaint about whether we fed him or if he was too tired or various other things. She once accused me of sending him home with fleas because she had a flea infestation at her house. My dogs do not have fleas, as I give them the monthly pill for it from the vet.

Every Christmas, holiday celebration, and birthday we have had her and my grandson at our house. I was hoping someday to be able to have him for holidays without her since she’s mean to my son and was their whole relationship. My grandson is two now and my son has never been allowed to have him overnight.

I was texting my son’s ex about Christmas and she agreed to let my son pick him up at her house and bring him to our house for Christmas Eve and then would bring him home.

My son just told me that she texted him and said that she was going to bring her boyfriend and her boyfriend‘s kid to our house for the holiday. I am frustrated. Am I the a**hole because I don’t want to have anything to do with her boyfriend or her boyfriend‘s kid?

This looks like it’s the only way I’m going to be able to see my grandson from now on. Doesn’t it seem odd for her to want us all to meet each other because she’s going to spend the rest of his life with him because we are the parents of her ex? I am uncomfortable with this.

These are the responses from Reddit users:

Mother_Search3350 −  You need to polish up that spine and put your big girl pants on and stop allowing that girl to b**ly you. Call her and tell her she will not be coming to your home and definitely not with her boyfriend or his kid.

Your son needs to go to family court and get a proper custody order in place for his son and court determined child support and not whatever that woman thinks she must get from him. Both you and your son need to get it together FFS

empathy10 −  It’s such an emotionally charged situation when there’s a little one involved that you want to stay close to however, you know that her demand isn’t reasonable or something you want so say no, it’s not going to work for you.

Then encourage your son to seek a lawyer’s advice to establish some sort of formal custodial agreement because at 2, your grandchild should be able to stay over with his father.

Crimsonwolf_83 −  YTA for not already getting court ordered custody

Itchy_Lingonberry_11 −  Did your son have a paternity test done, and why hasn’t your son been to court to sort out visitation and c h ild support?

shammy_dammy −  NTA. That’s when you tell him no, that is not going to happen. They are not invited.

Any-Expression2246 −  *”As soon as she got pregnant, she broke up with him and started talking to him about child support.”*. You sure that kid is your son’s??

HotspurJr −  NTA. You can say no. And there’s a legal process for custody. You say she doesn’t allow your son to have overnights, okay, fine, don’t leave it up to her. Involve the courts.

Bibliophile_w_coffee −  Family court immediately! You and your son don’t provide outside of the court and he shows up for every single visitation and he takes every second he is allowed. This happens IMMEDIATELY. Start calling attorneys today if still in business hours. Do not give her another season of precedent.

Eastern_Condition863 −  Your son seriously needs to go to court to exercise his rights as a parent. He should be allowed to have his own child overnight and on a regular weekly and holiday schedule so none of you have to be tossed around like a salad spinner til the kid turns 18.

NTA. This is your son’s circus that you are now having to manage all the feral monkeys. She’s beyond rude for inviting herself and her hooligans to your home during your Christmas.

Apprehensive_War9612 −  NTA. This is your son‘s fault. Your son should’ve taken her to court a long time ago and got a custody and visitation order. She doesn’t get to decide that he can’t keep his child overnight, a court does.

But he has to establish paternity. He has to pay child support and he has to prove that he has a safe place to bring the child. If he does those things he can have his child For set visitation time.

Do you think the Redditor should set boundaries to avoid further discomfort, or should they accept the ex’s terms for the sake of their grandson? How would you handle such a complex family dynamic? Share your thoughts below!