My sister decided to punish me for making her dinner “late” and I decided to stop doing her favors?

One Reddit user found themselves in a heated dispute with their sister after a seemingly minor request spiraled into a larger conflict about mutual support and expectations.

After cooking an omelette for her sister while hungry, the user faced an unexpected backlash when asking for dinner in return, leading to a tense exchange over perceived debts and fairness in their relationship.

Feeling undervalued and frustrated, the user decided to stop doing favors for their sister, leading to questions about whether they were justified in their actions. Was this user right to take a stand, or did they overreact to the situation? Read the full story below.

‘ My sister decided to punish me for making her dinner “late” and I decided to stop doing her favors?’

I (m31) live with my sister (f29) in a house we both rent. Yesterday night, my sister was studying for an exam the next day, and I had just come home from working at the library and food shopping for myself. At this point, I hadn’t eaten for about 7 hours and was feeling pretty hungry.

I was in the middle of making myself some pasta and some oven roasted veggies when she asked me if I could make her an omelette because she didn’t have time due to studying. A bit begrudgingly, I agreed to do it after I finished my cooking and eating to be nice/helpful.

I did scroll for about 10 minutes on my phone after I was finished cooking my food and eating. Call it de-stressing from the day or whatever. I made her an omelette right after and that was seemingly the end of it.

Today, I was in a rush to go to bed as I had to be up early for a commitment tomorrow and didn’t have time to make a proper dinner for myself, so I asked her if I could have some food that was prepared for her from our dad.

She asked me why she should let me have it, to which I replied “Well, I made an omelette for you last night.” In response she said, “Well it was 30 minutes late.” Not knowing how to handle this and not providing the key context that I made her food pretty much as soon as I could, I replied “So? You got your food.”

Clearly annoyed by that response, she simply said, “Ok, you can have the food, but only in 30 minutes.” Keep in mind that she had absolutely nothing going on in the next 30 minutes. Nothing logistically was holding her back from letting my have food that was just going to be reheated from the fridge.

When I told her that I don’t have time for that and that I had to be in bed ASAP, she basically told me “too bad” because I was late yesterday. I asked her why she is being vindictive, and she told as much as “Now you know how it feels” and “I’m trying to teach you a lesson that what goes around comes around.”

At this point, I tried reasoning with her about the different nature of the two scenarios, but she stood firm nonetheless and proceeded to broaden the convo about how she’s owed for all the cooking she’s done for me in her life and and how an omelette doesn’t make up for that.
Finally, enough was enough, and I told her, “fine, don’t expect me to do favors like this for you going forward because it’s obviously not appreciated” as well as “the only lesson I’ve learned here is that our relationship is transactional.” I then proceeded to send her two one-way texts (and blocked her afterwards)

1. The more we talk about “what we’re owed” in this relationship, the less we’re going to move on and improve things. I can point to plenty of things I have done for you over the years, most of the time to my detriment, and I don’t think you “owe” me for that.

2. Never mind the fact that I hadn’t eaten in seven hours yesterday and had to cook for myself before I cooked for you 🙄. I do feel like I could have handled myself better in this, but ultimately feel like what’s healthy for me is to cut off my casual support for her in the face of vindictiveness and lack of appreciation for my help.

Here’s what Redditors had to say:

throwaway-rayray −  NTA – sibling relationship aside, it seems your housemate relationship has soured. You may want to explore other options (as not living together may be better for your sibling relationship anyway).

DawnShakhar −  What is healthy for you is to break the lease and find other living arrangements. Living as an adult with relatives is always iffy, it it seems as if it is getting toxic in your case.

Nucf1ash −  You and your sister should start seeing other people. This relationship is toxic.

McDuchess −  NTA. She seems immensely immature. I would strongly recommend that you find a new place to live with a roommate who isn’t a n**ty tempered teenager.

Jatusay1 −  Wow, I think you made the right decision instead of being treated like that.

bugabooandtwo −  You’re both acting like brats. And newsflash…if you’re both having financial issues, you should be making meals for two, not one. A separate meal for each of you wastes electricity and uses up more groceries…for what? It’s a home, not a restaurant.

The two of you need to agree to a supper meal plan…3 days her choice, 3 days yours, and the 7th day it’s fend for yourselves (or leftovers). And whoevers choice is the one to make the meal that day.

Pandoratastic −  NTA – She said it herself. “what goes around comes around”

Far_Satisfaction_365 −  NTA. You could’ve easily told her “no” when she asked for you to cook her some food. She asked you a favor. She doesn’t get to dictate when you do it (as long as you didn’t agree to and then waited til morning to make it).

You aren’t a short order cook. From now on, until you are in a position to move out on your own, stop doing her favors and asking her for any.

No_Noise_5733 −  You may be adults but both of you are behaving like quarrelsome toddlers.

No-Communication9458 −  Don’t do anything for this person anymore. Gods she has the gall to say it’s late when you wanted to do something nice? Nope. She doesn’t deserve it.

What do you think about the dynamics between these siblings? Was the user justified in cutting off favors, or should they have found a way to resolve the situation differently? How would you navigate a similar conflict with a family member? Share your thoughts below!