A 16-year-old Reddit user ended her year-long relationship after discovering her boyfriend’s unsettling response to another girl’s advances. While he initially defended the relationship, his comment, “I’ll text you if I become single,” felt like a subtle betrayal. She chose to prioritize her self-respect and ended things, even though he didn’t seem to care. Read her story below and share your thoughts on how she handled the situation.

‘My Boyfriend Told Another Girl He’d Text Her If He’s Single – What Should I Do?’

I’m 16F, and my boyfriend (17M) and I had been dating for just over a year. Recently, I discovered something that left me questioning our entire relationship. A girl had messaged him, calling him “really cute” and asking him to hang out. To his credit, he told her he had a girlfriend. But then, he added something that broke my heart: “I’ll text you if I become single.”

He even thanked her for the compliments and said they could still be friends. While it might seem minor to some, to me, it felt like a betrayal. I couldn’t shake the thought: was this just an innocent response, or did it reveal something deeper about his feelings—or lack thereof—towards our relationship? Ultimately, I made the tough decision to end things. The hardest part? He didn’t seem to care.

Takeaway: Respect in a relationship means setting boundaries and being clear about what’s acceptable. When someone crosses those lines—even subtly—it’s okay to put yourself first. Have you ever been in a similar situation? How did you handle it?

Here’s what people had to say to OP:

Responsible_Lake_804 −  Make him single. Poof, his wish came true. You deserve better than that.

LiveCryptographer929 −  Yeah definitely.. leave him.

duckvimes_ −  Tell him “you should go text her now”.

FindingHerStrength −  Here’s some advice from a woman thirty years older than you. At 16/17 and more, your age group are navigating hormones and the transition into young adulthood. And unfortunately the majority at your age are not equipped to handle a relationship. Immaturity will ruin most relationships.

The brain’s prefrontal cortex, is one of the last parts of the brain to mature. This area is responsible for planning, prioritizing, and making good decisions and so forth. You could almost say it’s not his fault, it’s how he’s wired right now… but that wouldn’t be taking into consideration his moral compass either.

Long story short, you can’t prevent how he’s acting. But also you are both so young, maybe he cannot imagine committing to you at this stage in his life… It’s only been a year. Perhaps he’s considering keeping his options open, but that would require breaking up with you ~ and whilst he hasn’t said he’s going to do that; he’s giving her enough to hang onto in the interim period whilst you’re on the scene.

Ultimately, I wouldn’t waste any more of my time being concerned about where his head is at with all this. You do you, live your young life, have fun, don’t let him stop you enjoying your life. And also maybe you shouldn’t put all your eggs into his basket OP.

DeeplyTroubledSmurf −  Probably don’t date people who line up alternatives for when they’re done with you. Maybe bad, right?

Rhazelle −  My take on this may be unpopular but it’s based on taking the reality of the situation into context. Honestly, this is really bad if you’re adults in a long-term committed relationship. But given the reality of you two being teenagers, it’s bad but honestly par for the course at your age.

You’ve likely not been dating for very long, and as committed as you think you are, teenage commitment is pretty fickle because you don’t have a full understanding of what that even means or what it all entails yet. Teenagers don’t think long-term (even if they think they do, teenager “long-term” is different than adult “long-term”). They’re not fully aware of the consequences of how they should act and how it affects the other in a relationship (inexperience, really).

Obviously teenagers are hormonal as all f**k, and s**ual attention is very welcome. As adults we are more aware when it’s wrong, when we want nothing to do with it and shut it down but honestly even then not all adults are successful at doing that even knowing the consequences so Especially teenagers would have a hard time navigating this.

It is highly unlikely that you two will be together forever (realistically, even the next couple years) and so having someone they’re interested in on the side “makes sense” – even if he’s not consciously aware of that, the teenage environment supports it subconsciously when probably all the people at your age are just starting to figure out relationships, which leads to a lot of drama, relationship turnover, lots of people being interested in each other, etc.

Yes I’m sure some guys are 100% all in on a girl, a perfect, romantic, dedicated gentleman even at 16 but they’re a needle in a haystack. Your bf just… sounds like a normal teenage boy doing normal teenage boy things.

It sucks but my advice is just have fun and get some relationship experience. It sounds like he’s as respectful as I would expect a teenage boy to be, he’s not trying to cheat on you or actively hitting on her, even let her know he’s not single. If you’re having fun with him now I’d go with it, because realistically there is a VERY HIGH chance that this isn’t going to last into adulthood anyway and any other teenage boy would probably be similar on this front.

Nearby_Strawberry_94 −  Girl the fact that he even proposed to be friends with her knowing that she wants to hit is WILDD. No way he’s not gonna cheat and if he doesn’t then he knows he’s not staying with you it’s just a matter of time until he leaves you and becomes single..run as fast as possible.

wanttobedone −  He’s planning. You should also plan.

michaelpaoli −  What do i do if my boyfriend told a girl hes going to text her if hes single. * keep him not single or,. * make him single. is this breakup material chat. Depends if you want to turn it into that.

Nyx_Valentine −  My bigger problem is that he’s willing to remain friends with her, knowing she’s attracted to him. It would make me extremely wary of what she’d do if they hang out as friends. Is “I’ll text you if I become single” a weird thing to say? Yes. He’s a 17 y/o boy, I don’t know if that alone would be breakup worthy for me. Yes it implies that he finds her at least somewhat attractive and if he wasn’t in a committed relationship, he’d be down. Which is another reason I wouldn’t like the idea of them being friends.

I will say, at least he’s being forthcoming about being in a relationship and being faithful. If he admitted this to you (you don’t say how you know this information), you also see that he’s being honest, which is great. At minimum, I’d tell him I don’t like the idea of him being friends with her and that it makes me uncomfortable. See how he reacts to that.

(Also I don’t think there’s anything wrong with him saying thank you to her calling him cute. Someone can be married and if someone else says “you’re cute” it’s fine to say “thank you” if it feels flirty, then include “thank you but I’m xyz.”)