My boyfriend smells even straight after a shower. Is that normal and should I tell him?

A woman is concerned about her boyfriend’s odor, which she has noticed even after he showers. Despite thinking it might be normal, she’s now unsure after a particularly strong, off-putting smell after a recent encounter.

She is wondering if this could be related to an STI, hygiene issues, or something else, and is uncertain whether she should address it with him.

‘ My boyfriend smells even straight after a shower. Is that normal and should I tell him?’

I (33f) have been dating my (28m) for 3 years. When I’ve gone down on him before there’s always been an odor, even straight after a shower, but I thought it was just normal because my nose is down there.

Tonight, I put my hand down his pants for a minute and touched it softly (dry) and when I moved my hand up to my own body, a really bad and strong odor hit me. He had a shower about 10 minutes prior. The smell was kind of fishy and off.

It was so strong that anytime I put my hand near my face that’s all I could smell. I didn’t tell him because I don’t know if this is ‘normal’ or not. I know there is always a smell but this was quite strong.

Could this be something like an STI/STD, is it normal, could it be something else? Would love opinions and do I say something or see what happens next time? TL;DR my boyfriend smells ‘off’ and ‘fishy’ down there even straight after a shower. Is this normal or should I tell him to go to the doctor

Here’s what the community had to contribute:

Undottedly −  Taking a shower isn’t going to help if he isn’t actually cleaning down in there well or at all when he showers.

the_mk −  just tell him. i would be grateful if i smelled like d**th and was unaware of it and someone would point it to me

PixelSuicide −  HOLD ON. I just checked your Reddit history. WHY ARE YOU STILL WITH THIS GUY???? At this point… I dunno, I feel like giving any advice on this relationship is just flushing it down the toilet. PLEASE. You’re throwing your life away on this man. I’m both sad and angry rn and I don’t even know you. 🥲🥲🥲

omgforeal −  This is a comment thread but I’ll post it below as well as I want to make sure its seen: With regard to your comment/post history in mind (him being incarcerated and cheating on you within a year of this post): Your partner has a suspicious smell that could be from lack of hygiene or from an STI.

Your partner has previously cheated. Your partner has also been incarcerated for who knows what. Has this been a problem before now? What was he incarcerated for? When you look at just those details – number 1, it looks pretty suspicious.

number 2, what exactly makes you afraid to speak with someone about their scent after three years at your age? number 3, what exactly keeps you with someone who doesn’t prioritize honesty?

Advice across the board is – be honest and compassionate that he might need to change his bathing style and/or see a doctor. Sneaking around and “figuring it out” by joining him the shower or whatever is such a red flag- particularly with the other details. At three years you should be able to say this to him.

Advice with the other details – why exactly are you with him? What does he bring that you couldn’t find elsewhere? What exactly is keeping you with someone who cheats, commits crimes, and isn’t clean?

limskit −  if this is the same man you have been posting about for the last couple years, you need to leave. You can’t have a man who’s stinky, inconsiderate, and stupid.

Zenerte −  This the same boyfriend who went to jail, cheated on you for a year, and ghosted you on christmas? An almost 30 year old boy who can’t even clean his genitals properly? I think you know what should really be scrubbed here.

Healthy_Key9580 −  does he have foreskin? and if so, is he cleaning it?

Elisa_LaViudaNegra −  Girl, you’ve been making posts about this guy for two years. Just d**p him already.

max-torque −  He might not be cleaning properly, soap between his b**t cheeks, across the a**s and taint. And clean his d**k properly. Shaving down there helps reduce smell too.

Have you ever been in a situation where a partner’s hygiene or odor became a concern? How did you approach the conversation without causing embarrassment or tension? Share your thoughts on how to address sensitive topics in relationships.