My best friend [22F] is giving up a full-ride scholarship to be with her boyfriend of >3 months

A Redditor shared their concern about their best friend, who is giving up a full-ride scholarship to transfer universities and be closer to a boyfriend she has only been dating for a few months. Despite efforts to dissuade her, the friend remains convinced this is true love. Read the original story below.

‘ My best friend [22F] is giving up a full-ride scholarship to be with her boyfriend of >3 months?’

My best friend has a full-ride scholarship (tuition, rent, books) from our university. She is a very book smart girl and has been on the Dean’s List almost every semester. This is our third year of college. The issue is that she is a gullible person.

Even though she is book smart, she will get caught up in things like multi-level marketing schemes. She will date older men who take advantage of her. Many things like that. While she was home over the summer, she and her old high school crush [20M] started hanging out.

At the end of the summer, he “officially asked her to be his girlfriend.” I like the guy and think he is better for her than her past flings, but they are getting very serious very fast. Last month, she told me she was thinking about transferring to his university.

I told her that was ridiculous as she would give up her scholarship and have to take out loans. Turns out she applied to transfer anyway. Today she got her acceptance notice and couldn’t be more excited.

I’ve already told her this is a bad idea. But she is so gullible. And her mother is the same way. Her mom thinks this is true love: two small town lovebirds crossing paths again.

My roommate keeps saying that this is just like her parents’ romance, and she needs to give this relationship everything. (Oh, her parents are divorced, by the way.) Is there anything I can say or do to help her reconsider? I already voiced my opinion once, and it didn’t do anything..

Take a look at the comments from fellow users:

miss_trixie −  while your friend is clearly making a bad decision, it’s her bad decision to make. if you feel you must, have another talk with her but it sounds like it’s gonna fall on deaf ears. her mother sure is a piece of work. good grief.

AskMeThingsAboutStuf −  Honestly, this is the kind of thing where you just need to let it play out. You already voiced your concerns. That’s the best you can do sometimes. If you push harder then you’ll only be pushing her away. Besides… who are you to say that this won’t work out well in the long run?

Cyonella −  As stupid as we know this decision is, she needs to make her own mistakes. It’s never too late to undo a mistake. You might need to travel a different, more complicated path, but she needs to make whatever silly mistakes she’s going to make so that she can grow as a person.

ultimaterufffles −  As depressing as it may seem, I don’t think that there is much that you can say or do to change her mind

Revonue −  Maybe point out that if it’s true love it can wait until she graduates, and that this is a decision that will effect her a LONG time, regardless of how long the relationship lasts. She has a full-ride scholarship. Does she have a job? Does she have a job set up where she’s moving?

Does she realize that financial aid is a PITA and she may have to end up paying for books and stuff out of pocket? Does she realize how expensive those books are? The commenters are right in that it’s her decision. But maybe giving her some cold hard facts (have a receipt for textbooks? I’m sure you can find one) will make her rethink.

jupitaur9 −  Can you confront him? She’s all starry eyed. He might need to know that giving her a year at her full ride college is a sacrifice HE can make that would be good for both of them. She’s thinking of giving up something for love. Why shouldn’t he think the same thing?

[Reddit User] −  Heartbreaking. But nothing you can do.

motherkos −  It’s not up to you, and trying to convince her not to make this incredibly stupid decision will only drive a wedge between you two. If it blows up in her face, she’s got no one to blame but herself. You’ve already voiced your opinion, so there’s nothing else you can do.

mozarella_stix −  Ask her why she is the one making the sacrifices, not her boyfriend. In the end though, there’s nothing you can do. She’s an adult and she has the right to crash and burn.

[Reddit User] −  They will be broken up before the academic year is over and she will be stuck holding all those loans. She will then become a case study for stupidity. You can keep trying to convince her not to do this but I doubt you will be successful. However, you are a good friend for trying.

Do you think this young woman is making a heartfelt choice or a rushed decision she may regret? Have you faced a similar dilemma when it came to balancing love and long-term goals? Share your thoughts below!

For those who want to read the sequel: https://aita.pics/XhaIP