My (21M) friend (21F) is being forced to marry a 43 year-old man.

A 21-year-old man shares the heartbreaking situation of his friend, a 21-year-old woman from an underprivileged background in India, who is being forced by her parents into marrying a 43-year-old man. This man, already married to two women and with multiple children, is paying her parents a large sum of money in exchange for the marriage. The user and their friends are trying to support her in breaking free from this situation, but her fear and the oppressive environment make it challenging.

‘ My (21M) friend (21F) is being forced to marry a 43 year-old man.’

Me and my friend are both from India. We recently graduated from our college and were planning to get a good job. She is from a very underdeveloped village and was given scholarship by the government to study. Her parents are socially backward and never contributed for her well being and were against of her education from start.

Her mom is abusive and her father is an a**oholic. She is the only one in her family to graduate. Her sister dropped out of the school and works as a part time maidservant. The one who supported her through tough times is her aunt. Her aunt fought with her parents and supported her through graduation, but she later passed away last december.

Now that her aunt is out of the way her parents are trying to claim her as their own. Her parents are forcing her to marry a 43 year-old for their personal gain. Basically this man is ready to offer her parents three lakhs rupees ( roughly 4354 USD) in exchange of their daughter. The man in question is very shady.

He has many lawsuits filed over him and is potentially connected with the local gang members. He is avoiding his jail time because of his political connections and power. He is already married to two women 41F and 32F and has four children, eldest being a 19 year old boy. My friend do not know what to do. She cried yesterday while being with our other friends.

We are motivating her to move away from her parents and start her own life. But she is too scared to take any actions. If the marriage continues and they both get married, her life will get ruined. She will get abused more and will be forced to work in kitchen for rest of her life. I want advice about helping my friend through this situation.

Let’s dive into the reactions from Reddit:

Shrek2_TheShrekening −  I had a Pakistani school friend who was murdered by her parents because she refused to go into an arranged marriage. Whatever advice you take away from this thread, I will tell you now what I wish I could have said to her: Seek any possible kind of help. Contact the women’s helpline. Make sure she tells as many friends as possible about the situation and finally, find someone you trust to stay with

[Reddit User] −  Send me a PM. I have two close family members who are politicians in Punjab and Chandigarh. They work to stop dowery, holiday brides, and things of this nature.

fixzion −  Can she do basic computer stuff?read emails or print bills?can offer a job. Close to Mumbai for starting a new life.

Vini-B −  Tell her to call National Women helplines or simply 103. If he is rich or connected the cops might be bought, so try to find a helpful women’s rights worker/didi. Which state is she from? That will help narrow things down a bit.

[Reddit User] −  I found a link where there are some numbers she can call . She might be too scared to take action, but she should do it and do it soon or her being “too scared” might turn into an everyday thing for her. Tell her to run. When parents arent home or are sleeping at night. Tell her to grab the essentials and get out.

I’ve never been to India before so I’m unfamiliar and ignorant when it comes to all of this. But what I do know is that she has to do something fast before it’s too late. She has you. She has other friends. Can you or her other friends take her in for a while? Call the numbers from the link. Either way you have to act.. Keep us updated. I’ll be praying.

Beethovens666th −  Well s**t, OP. I’ll (25M) offer her parents twice that and then get a divorce (or stay ostensibly married to avoid social complications). Not even joking.

Karaamjeet −  3rd Generation Indian here. I know exactly how old generational family members think. The best thing is probably just move away. Her parents mindset will ultimately never change. I know it seems like a big thing to move away, but there seems like there is nothing positive left in her family.

Just be there to comfort and support her and give her the best advice. There are also many hotlines that can be used to help her.

detective_banana4 −  As a girl from a western country who is right now sitting in a library and studying this breaks my heart… I wish all the luck of the world to your friend

sandeshrai12 −  If she runs away, there is a risk that her life won’t pan out well. If she marries the man, her life will definitely be ruined. I think the decision is clear on here. My best wishes to her.

This situation highlights the devastating effects of forced marriages and societal pressure. How can communities and friends support individuals facing such circumstances? Have you or someone you know experienced something similar? Share your thoughts and advice below.