I [M36] don’t want to set up my wife’s friend [F31] with any of my friends.
A Reddit user shared their dilemma about refusing to set up their wife’s friend, Chrissy, with any of their own friends. Despite Chrissy’s persistent interest in meeting someone through their social circle, the user feels she wouldn’t be a good match for any of their friends due to her attitude and behavior.
The user now seeks a way to explain this to their wife without offending her or causing tension. Read the full story below to learn more about the situation and weigh in on how to handle such a delicate conversation.
‘ I [M36] don’t want to set up my wife’s friend [F31] with any of my friends.’
My wife, Jill, has a friend I’ll call Chrissy. Chrissy is on the prowl for a boyfriend. Chrissy asks Jill if I’ve got any eligible friends, which I do. I don’t want to set my friends up with Chrissy. I’m not crazy about Chrissy. I’ve got nothing against her, but she’s not someone I’d consider a good match for any of my friends.
She’s the type to swipe through Tinder and make n**ty comments about what ugly losers the guys are despite being, uh, not a beauty queen or great success herself. She’s loud and brash. She hasn’t got much going for her, as far as I can tell. She talks a lot about reality TV, but I’ve never heard of anything like a hobby or a social life outside of happy hour and internet dating.
I don’t judge my wife’s friendship with her – some of my friends are jackasses too, whatever. Maybe Chrissy’s a fun drinking buddy. But I just don’t consider Chrissy a catch and don’t want to be responsible for setting her up with my friends. I picture a hypothetical single me being set up on a date with Chrissy, and later telling my matchmaking friend not to do me any more favors.
My wife, Jill, has brought this up once or twice. The problem is that Chrissy keeps asking Jill about it, and has mentioned it to me once or twice. Chrissy clearly isn’t letting this go.
How do I tell my wife that I rate her friend two thumbs down and get rid of her without being n**ty?
Check out how the community responded:
callherhopeless − The edit is perfect, haha. Glad everything worked out.
[Reddit User] − How do I tell my wife that I rate her friend two thumbs down and get rid of her without being n**ty? “Tell her that I don’t think any of my friends are her type.”
zebrasandgiraffes − Don’t you have any u**outh, gross, or annoying friends? It seems most friend groups have that one guy. Set one of those up with Chrissy and maybe she won’t ask again.
UncleSneakyFingers − I think you need to explain your user name to your wife more than you need to explain this friend situation. I would be asking quite a few questions I was her.
wizardwithay − Try: “Sorry, Jill, but I don’t think any of my friends are Chrissy’s type. I wouldn’t feel comfortable setting them up.”. If that doesn’t work… “Hey Jill, please stop telling Chrissy that I can set her up with one of my friends. I know you’re trying to be a nice friend, but it’s really putting me in a bind.
I would have liked to be asked first, and besides that I don’t think she’d be a good match with any of them. Please stop offering on my behalf as it’s really making me feel awkward.”
NahNotOnReddit − F**k it, I’ll go out with Chrissy
onelesscarb − How did you even make it this far in your relationship if you can’t even talk about something so simple? This sub has become f**king ridiculous.
Pantone711 − What are the chances Chrissy reads Reddit too?
Our_GloriousLeader − Maybe not friends, but got any enemies..?
CoachPlatitude − Tell your wife what you wrote here, she’ll think of something to tell this lady
Should the user stick to their instincts and avoid setting Chrissy up, or is there a more tactful way to navigate this situation? Have you ever been in a similar position where matchmaking didn’t feel right? Share your perspective and advice in the comments below!