I (22M) just walked in on my girlfriend (21F) of 7 years having s** with my roommate (22M).

A Reddit user shared their concerns about their sister’s upcoming destination wedding, which has caused tension within their family. The wedding requires significant travel expenses, making it difficult for many relatives to attend, and the user feels their sister isn’t considering the impact on others.

After expressing their worries, the sister accused them of ruining her happiness, and now other family members are siding against the user. To find out more about the situation and how others have responded, read the full story below…

‘ I (22M) just walked in on my girlfriend (21F) of 7 years having s** with my roommate (22M).’

My last class of the day was cancelled, so I decided to come home and surprise my girlfriend. I went to the store and grabbed everything to make her favorite meal (lasagna). I was carrying the bags up the stairs and put them down in front of the door to fish my keys out of my pocket and then I heard my girlfriend moaning.

I thought that she was “taking care of herself” because I know that she likes to do that sometimes when I’m not around, so I didn’t have a sudden “ah-ha” moment or anything. I walked in and there were her and my roommate on the couch. I opened the door and kind of just froze when I saw it. She looked up and me and he turned around and saw it was me, and I just saw red.

As much as I wanted to, I didn’t kick his ass. I just dropped the bags and walked away. As I was getting into my car, they both came running out and yelling at me to stop, but I just floored it and got out of there as quickly as I could. I called my best friend and talked to him about it. He offered to come kick his ass, I told him no. I didn’t want him to get in trouble from it.

I even had the engagement ring that I planned to use to propose to her this summer when we went on vacation. It’s in my safe that I keep in the closet, so I know that she doesn’t know about it. But I planned to spend the REST OF MY LIFE WITH HER! Why didn’t I see this coming? My last class was supposed to start at 12, but since it was cancelled, I was home by 12.30.

So it’s been 4+ hours. My phone has been blowing up from both of them, I haven’t looked at any of the messages or answered any of the calls. I called my bank and made sure that she wasn’t on any of my accounts for anything. I’m going to go back later tonight and pack up all of her stuff and drop it off at her place tomorrow.

Then I’ll probably take a bag of clothes to my friend’s house and stay there until school ends (3 weeks).. What do I do next?

Here’s what the community had to contribute:

iwillnoteatgreeneggs −  7 f**king years. Honest advice: you are going to experience a tremendous amount of emotion in the next few weeks. Stay in no contact with them no matter how angry sad dissapointed you feel. Secure your things, make arrangements to stay somewhere and start healing now.

Bright side: You could have wasted more time dating her and being friends with him, and this could have happened after you invested in marriage.

[Reddit User] −  Thank god for that class being cancelled or you could have been stuck with her for much longer. Now is when you begin to heal. After you drop off all of her stuff – be sure to go no contact with her. Block her on all social media, block her number. Make sure your friends know to not relay any information about her to you.

Then you need to keep yourself busy with school or work. Dive into your hobbies or find new ones. Start working out, take cooking classes, go to yoga. Surround yourself with friends and family. Try to fill up all your free time as much as possible. It’ll be hard at first, but it gets easier with every day.

Zorkeldschorken −  Make sure that your soon-to-be-ex-roommate is not there when you go to pack up, or take a couple of friends with you. Block both of them on everything. Phone, email, Facebook, everything. Make it so that they can’t contact you. If either of them tries to a**ush you in public (like after your classes or at your job) just walk away.

Take some time for yourself. You’ve got 7 years of mental habits that center around her. So find some new ones. Take up a new hobby. Get a gym membership. Go on a trip.

slashdor −  Its simple never talk to her again. Never even give her a chance to explain. Let her feel like crap for the rest of her life. She doesn’t deserve another minute of your time. I wouldn’t even talk to either one of them. I would just move on like it meant nothing and never look back.

furryoso −  With your age and the amount of time you’ve had, I can imagine your devastation. You were probably each other’s first everything… and you’ve basically had her as a girlfriend for 1/3 of your life.. The relationship is over. What she did to you is unforgivable. To betray you in your own home with someone you live with is devastating.

For you to catch her in the act is something you will never be unable to see.. You must know that this is over. You also must be prepared for her to use everything she knows about you, knowing that she knows you better than anyone, to try to get forgiveness or even for you to take her back. You must not worry about revenge. You must not worry about their feelings

Don’t worry about her family, your family, etc. You must only worry about yourself. Everyday remind yourself that you deserve better. You did nothing wrong. Hell, you had extra time and went to make her something special. She had time when she thought you wouldn’t be there to bone your roommate on your couch. You didn’t do anything to cause this and you deserve better.

Change her name on your phone to “Don’t get back together” and be strong. Don’t worry about the tears. You’re going to cry. Real men cry. It’s ok. Let it out… then stand tall. You are the good guy. You found out before you had kids. You found out while you’re still in your prime. You were extremely lucky to find out when you did… so take this as it is… focus on yourself.

[Reddit User] −  Also, get your STD checks set up.

alterperspective −  Nothing more to do. Be the boss.

AirIndex −  Sounds like you have it covered. The only thing I can think of, which you’ve probably thought of anyway, is make sure that you have a friend with you when you collect your stuff from your flat. Other than that, this is a horrible situation and I’m sorry for you.

ImDaChineze −  This is going to sound horrible but my ex of 1.5 years did something similar, and this post made me feel slightly better because at least it wasn’t 7 years close to engagement. I’m here if you need to talk to me man.

Suckerpunched29 −  this is going to seem odd, but get yourself set in your mind as to what you saw. What the hell am I talking about you ask? Well, believe it or not, sometimes these people will look you straight in the eye and say ‘it’s not what you think’ – they will seriously try and convince you ‘you have it all wrong’… It’s called ‘g**lighting’ and cheaters can be shameless about it.

You know what you heard and saw. Don’t allow yourself to be manipulated in your emotionally confused and vulnerable state into questioning your own sanity. Believe it or not it can and does happen. Very sorry this happened to you, I know it is a nightmare. Best of luck going forward.

Do you think the user was right to voice their concerns, or should they have let their sister handle the wedding as she sees fit? How would you navigate a situation where family plans feel overwhelming or exclusionary? Share your thoughts below and join the discussion!