Guy on NYC subway refused to move his satchel from the seat next to him so I can sit. AITAH for sitting, anyway?

A Reddit user shared a story of an uncomfortable encounter on the NYC subway when a man refused to move his satchel from the seat next to him, despite the user needing the seat after a long day of work.

After a tense exchange, the user refused to back down and ultimately sat down, leading to a confrontation. The man then escalated the situation with rude and insulting comments. The Redditor wants to know if they were wrong for insisting on taking the seat. Read the full story below.

‘ Guy on NYC subway refused to move his satchel from the seat next to him so I can sit. AITAH for sitting, anyway?’

I boarded the train after work during peak hour. I notice there was only one potential seat left in the train car. This well kept guy had a double seat to himself, wearing good slacks, designer leather shoes, and a trench coat. He was sitting in the middle and had placed his satchel on to the left of him.

There was space next to his right, but not enough for me to sit comfortably. I tried to get his attention so I can ask him to move over. He had his ear buds on and looked straight ahead as I waved. I knew he could see me so I leaned a bit over to be more in his field of view.

He took his sweet time to look up at me. I politely asked for him to move a bit over so I can sit. HE LOOKED AT ME UP AND DOWN, DOWN AND UP, ACTIVELY CHECKING ME OUT, BEFORE SAYING: “For you, I’d rather not”. I am a diagnostic medical sonographer, having just got off a 10 hr shift at my hospital.

I had a long day, which included finding advanced cancer in an 8 year old. I wanted to sit. And I said: “Excuse me? Seats aren’t for your bag or for you to h** to yourself.” He again checks me out in disgust before saying: “I’m not arguing about a seat, especially with you looking like that”

How was I looking? Tired, with my hair up in a messy bun. I’m somewhat average built, thick legs, tall. In case you were wondering. So I said:” I worked a long day, just like you, and there’s no way you’re implying that your bag is going to occupy a seat before a paying passenger.”

The vibe he was giving was very much a: “you’re not worthy to be in my presence, let alone sit next to me, p**sant” vibe. I was taken aback, to be frank. He said: “like I already told you, I’m not arguing over a seat” and then proceeded to stare ahead into the abyss again. In the attempt to ignore me.

The b!tch switch was flipped at that point 🤷🏽‍♀️ That empty space to his right? I decided to wedge myself in. I was sitting one way or another. And as I go to do to so, HE SLIDES OVER SO I END UP BRUSHING HIS LAP, AND TRIED TO PUSH ME FROM BEHIND SO I’D FALL FACE FIRST.

He was on that type of petty time. And I had the time too. He was short, definitely not as strong as me. So I stood my ground and wouldn’t let him shove me face first. He’s actively pushing me forward and I’m forcing myself to stay in place.

In the scuffle, his man purse fell and the seat to his left was now completely available. So, I sat. Like musical chairs. And boy, did he not like that I won a seat. He grabbed his man purse from the floor and decided to stand in front of me.

I assume to try and assert his frail male ego, I mean, “dominance”, over me. After a shouting match in which he quickly realized that I wasnt going to back down from.

He then continued to go on a whole rant to himself about “bitches gotta respect when they’re not given a seat” and “a b**ch like me is probably ran through and no man wants bitches like that” oh, and the “fat bitches like me should be walking home, not taking a train”
Sorry I consume food and not crack, sir???

I looked him dead in his eye and laughed at him the entire time. He also did not like that, but I definitely wasn’t going to have him think I wouldn’t bust his ass if it came down to it. I grew up with boys, and I definitely could’ve taken on his oompa loompa self.

He ranted on and off throughout the entire 35 min train ride. Before he got off he said: “Don’t get passed around too much this holiday”
And I laughed and said: “you must have me confused for your momma sir, have a nice Thanksgiving”. Am I the a**hole for making my way into a seat I essentially paid for?

Here’s how people reacted to the post:

Harvard_Diplomat −  You two know how to flirt! LMAO

Silent_Cash_E −  Once someone puts hands on you, it is acceptable to be their ass up and down the length of the train. Edit: beat

azorgi01 −  I call AI, mainly because if this was in NYC in a full train car, the second someone would have waved a second time for attention, 50 cameras would be recording looking for content, especially after an argument developed.

puffpastrysweet −  You paid for that ride just like he did, and you had every right to claim that seat. If his bag wanted to sit, it should’ve bought a ticket.

KingsCountyWriter −  As a lifelong NYC subway rider, this took too long. Refused to acknowledge you when asking for a seat? Don’t ask again; just sit, especially after a long day.

He had it coming refusing to acknowledge you early on. I would have read into his outfit, sized up his knuckles, do less work than you and be ready for throw hands.. Enjoy the holiday!

TheRandom6000 −  This sounds completely made up.

bruce_cocker −  No conversation between strangers on the nyc subway lasts this long. Good daydream though

EldritchAnimation −  It’s like an alien wrote what it thinks a human subway conflict could look like with it’s only input source being snarky Reddit comments. YTA for the weird fantasy.

jeyrey2000 −  Fake post!

Away-Investigator353 −  NYC has had stuff happening like this my entire life, I’ve been in similar situations before and I’ll straight up just sit on peoples bags if they don’t move em. NTA and have had even crazier stuff happen to me in the subway before, even if the story is fake these kind of things actually do happen in NYC

Was the Redditor justified in standing her ground and taking the seat she was entitled to, or did she escalate the situation unnecessarily? How would you have handled the situation on the subway? Share your thoughts below!