UPDATE: recently found out that I (17M) got into my brother’s (19M) former dream university which he did not get accepted to last year,feeling guilty about really wanting to go now?

After feeling apprehensive about sharing the news of his acceptance to his older brother’s (19M) former dream university, a 17-year-old (M) finally mustered the courage to tell him. To his relief, his brother was thrilled for him, offering nothing but support and encouragement. Their conversation not only alleviated his guilt but also strengthened their bond.

For those who want to read the previous part: https://aita.pics/AtPxw

‘ UPDATE: recently found out that I (17M) got into my brother’s (19M) former dream university which he did not get accepted to last year, feeling guilty about really wanting to go now?’

On Saturday I was able to speak to my brother and tell him that I got into the university. He was really happy for me, like a lot of people said he would be. When I told him I got in he gave me a huge hug and was really excited. It was such a huge relief.

He asked me if it was my top choice, since he didn’t know I had applied. I told him it was and he said that we have to celebrate then. He told me I didnt seem excited enough and I should be really proud of myself, and he asked if it was the shock of just finding out.

When I told him I find out a few days ago and he was the only one that knew he asked me whats going on, because I wasnt reacting to the great news like it was great news. I admitted that I worried about telling him because I didnt want him to be mad.

We talked about it and he basically said what everyone in the comments said, that he’s proud of me and happy for me. I mentioned that I got into a different program than his and my requirements were lower, and he told me to not downplay my success and to stop worrying about him being mad because he wasn’t.

He told me that when I told out parents he wanted me to be more confident and proud of myself, because I did something great. Yesterday while we were hanging out at his buddy’s house he told me I should tell them the news,

when I didnt want to because I hate talking about myself he asked if could tell them, which I told him was OK. they were all happy for me too. Honestly, he’s reaction was better than I even hoped for, but looking back I should have expected it from him because that’s always been the type of brother he is.

TL;DR told my brother I got into the university and he incredibly supportive and happy for me. He told me not limit my success to make other people more comfortable, and that he was proud of me (which meant a lot to hear).

Here’s what the community had to contribute:

PandaBeaarAmy −  Your brother sounds amazing! Congrats on getting into your top choice!!

iwasjackduluoz −  You and your brother sound wonderful, I hope you can always rely on each other like this. Congratulations on getting into the university of your choice. 🙂

queen-ofthenorth −  Your brother is awesome and so are you! Congratulations 😊

Phat_with_an_F −  You have an awesome brother. Kudos to him for being great about it and congratulations on getting into your first choice!!

revode −  Your brother sounds so wonderful and supportive, it’s so nice to see that you are both so concerned for each other. As someone who ended up settling for a school other than my dream school, you definitely come to accept your choice and make the most of it.

And when the option of transferring came up later, I realized it wasn’t worth the hassle when I had found a perfectly good, if not better program, and it sounds like your brother has similarly accepted his program. Best of luck to the both of you, I hope your semesters go well!

peronium1 −  My older sister got accepted into a prestegious university far from home, but my parents would have none of it. When my turn came, she stopped at nothing to let them let me do the same, and off I went on a plane. Several years later now, my sister occasionally voices her bitterness and resentments.

She only does this when she goes through a hard time herself though, so even though she makes me feel entitled and miserable in the moment, it tells me that her actions then were driven by immense love—if not for me, then at least for what she deeply believes is right.

[Reddit User] −  Your bro sounds like a real bro.. r/brothersbeingbros

floating_bells_down −  You guys have a really healthy relationship. Congratulations. He has a really healthy relationship with himself. He is able to celebrate other people’s success; when others are successful, it doesn’t effect his self-esteem, ego, self-worth, feeling of safety in the world, etc.

You deserve to love yourself a little better. If he HAD gotten mad, I hope you still would have gone to that college. Because you WILL come across people who don’t like that you’re more successful.

And that will be an issue they have with themselves. The kind of person you’re afraid your brother might have been? Hopefully that person will develop a better relationship with success. It’s not a reason for you to live a lesser life.

READBOOOOKS −  CONGRATS!!!! Let your brother know that university and college aren’t necessarily career makers or breakers. It’s who you know in the field you want to work in that’s likely most important for your future jobs.

I went to a community college and now I’m sitting next to NYU and Yale graduates at my work station.. Good luck to the both of you.

Schmaron −  This… great example of communication and a great family dynamic! You and your brother are one hell of a team!