AITAH? I made my fiancé storm out of the house because he said my job is easy ?

A 26-year-old woman feels unappreciated in her part-time housekeeping job and is frustrated with her fiancé, Kenny, who dismisses her work as easy. After asking him to help with chores and receiving a hurtful comparison to his mother’s experience, she tells him she needs space, leading him to storm out.

They haven’t spoken since. Read the original story below…

‘ AITAH? I made my fiancé storm out of the house because he said my job is easy ?’

I (26F) am a part time housekeeper. I go to night school to finish my degree. I have a fiancé, Kenny (29M), who is a mechanic. The problem started between us almost recently. I have been asking Kenny to help me with the household chores more.

But every time he gives excuses that he is busy or tired all day after dealing with cars. I get his job is a physically demanding jobs but so is mine. I clean houses during the day and have to attend my classes in the evening. I only have 1 year left and lately we are thinking about marriage.

So, I am working extra hard for that. Kenny doesn’t think my job is that hard. He always says I am just weak and lazy that I complain about cleaning houses. We have had multiple fights about it but every time we would resolve it.

This week, I asked him if he could clean the kitchen because I have work load and my exams are near. He refuses because he claims he works more than I do. And just because I am a housekeeper I should do it.

He then tried to justify his reply by telling me that if our car broke down he would fix it because he is a mechanic, so since I am a housekeeper I should do it.
I tried many ways to explain how physically demanding my job is.

Many people think housekeeping and cleaners or organizers do nothing for society but the truth is different. We make a house livable. And it takes times and sometimes hours to do so. It is physically and emotionally draining and not to mention how underappreciative some people can be.

But no, the fight just escalated. Lastly the thing that made me want to throw him out was when he said “I don’t see why you have a problem. My mom had 7 kids and still had a squeaky clean house. You on the other hand are making excuses. It’s not like your job is hard. It’s just cleaning houses.

If you can do it in other places why not here. Try working as a mechanic.” I told him I need space from him and he stormed out. He and I haven’t talked. Did I go too far?

Here’s what Redditors had to say:

Ok_Examination3023 −  NTA. If you had broken bicycles at home every single day then his argument would make more sense. House chores are something that needs to be done all the time. It’s a humongous amount of invisible unappreciated work.

And for some reason mostly women are expected to do it. I’m not a housekeeper but an IT specialist and I’m still doing more chores at home and getting into arguments over it. Your partner is lazy and doesn’t appreciate your work. Stand your ground.

jackieblueideas −  You realize that, if you finish your studies, get a new job, and marry him, it means you’ll be working a job and cleaning the house without help forever?

judgejoebrown77 −  NTA, tell your husband i called him weak and lazy. I work in mechatronics, aka turn wrenches but on automation lines. Even after my 12 to 16 hr work days i still try to help around the house and spend time with the kiddo.

I live in the house we call home, me and my wife both work. Does it matter the job? No. Its the fact he lives there and should also help.

frolicndetour −  NTA. If your job is so undemanding he should be able to clean the whole house in his off time without breaking a sweat. It’s concerning that your fiance is a disrespectful turd who doesn’t do his share. If you have kids with him someday, count on doing all the work yourself.

yellowbrownstone −  Run. Honey just f**king run. He’s disrespectful and mean if asking for help makes him call you names like lazy and weak. This behavior will intensify if you get married. Guys like this don’t get better, they get worse.

BeKindImNewButtercup −  NTA. My husband owns an auto repair shop and is crazy busy but even when he was solely working on cars, he always helped with our home and children. Do not marry or have children with this man until he completely changes his mindset!

Dizzy_Eye5257 −  Don’t marry someone who insults you, demeans you, or belittles you.

[Reddit User] −  My dad’s aunt was a housekeeper and a cleaner and no, it is NOT an easy job. You have to deep clean everything which includes removing furniture and cleaning under them. You have to wipe the surfaces with different cleaning solutions.

I have seen many tiktoks of housekeepers saying how it takes them hours to clean a house. Not to mention some houses are deep in dirt that hasn’t been cleaned for months. Also organizing is a great skill. Organization makes life easier.

There is relation between proper organization and better mental health so these jobs are not easy. He is just an AH if he thinks these jobs are easy.

SledgeHannah30 −  He’s icky. Should you choose to get married and procreate, he’s going to push all child duties on you.. Absolutely leave his ass.

[Reddit User] −  NTA. Do not marry this man. Based on what he said about his mom he’s never going to help in the home and most likely with the children. You need to find man who considers you as a partner, not as a housekeeper and eventually a nanny.

Was her reaction justified, or did she overreact? Should she have handled the situation differently? What do you think? Share your thoughts below!