AITAH for refusing to pay for my sister’s honeymoon after she changed her wedding plans last minute?

A Reddit user shared a dilemma involving a family wedding and a honeymoon gift gone awry. After offering to pay for his sister’s honeymoon as a special gift, the user’s excitement turned to frustration when his sister decided to exclude his girlfriend from the wedding at the last minute. Feeling hurt and upset, the user decided to withdraw the honeymoon offer. Now, his sister is angry, and the family is divided. Was the user in the wrong for withholding the honeymoon gift, or was his decision justified? Read the full story below and judge for yourself.

‘ AITAH for refusing to pay for my sister’s honeymoon after she changed her wedding plans last minute?’

So, my (32M) sister (28F) got married last month, and I was super excited for her. A few months before the wedding, I offered to pay for their honeymoon as a gift. I’d saved up for it, and I wanted to do something special because she’s my only sibling. We agreed on a destination, and I booked everything: flights, hotel, excursions, the works.

Fast forward to three weeks before the wedding, and my sister calls me to say she and her fiancé have decided to turn their big wedding into a small backyard ceremony. No big deal, it’s their wedding, their choice. But then she casually adds, “Oh, and by the way, we’re inviting only immediate family, so you can still come, but you can’t bring your girlfriend.”

For context, my girlfriend and I have been together for five years. She’s basically part of the family and was really looking forward to coming. I tried to talk to my sister about it, but she said they wanted to “keep it small” and that she hoped I’d understand. My girlfriend was hurt, but we decided to let it go and just roll with it.

The wedding was fine, but it felt weird without my girlfriend there. Afterward, my sister asked when they’d get the details for their honeymoon, and I told her I’d decided not to pay for it anymore. I explained that it didn’t feel fair to exclude my girlfriend from the wedding but still expect such a big gift from me. She got upset and said I was being petty and trying to ruin her big moment.

Now my parents are involved, saying I should have just sucked it up and that family comes first. My girlfriend thinks I was justified, but I’m starting to second guess myself. AITAH?

Here’s what the community had to contribute:

Striking_hobo −  Just tell her half of the honeymoon gift is from your gf. So you can only afford to send one of them.

Dipshitistan −  NTA. “I decided to keep my gift small, and I hoped you’d understand.”

Cracker_Bites −  NTA. They thought they could save the moolah and have a kickarse holiday at your expense. Yeah nah. Take your partner instead. She deserves it after being left out like that. Sis can pay for her own damn honeymoon since they opted for a smaller wedding ceremony.

dangerrnoodle −  None of this makes sense. Scaling down a wedding three weeks before would be impossible without losing substantial sums of money. And how did you book everything, which requires payment, and cancel on such short notice without again losing a substantial sums of money? All just for revenge? Doesn’t make sense.

MikeReddit74 −  Any time a post includes the phrase, “family comes first(or some variation thereof),” I automatically assume it’s fake. However, assuming this is real, if your girlfriend meant as much to you as you say she does, I wouldn’t have gone to the wedding without her. Also(again, assuming this is real), if your parents mean what they say bout family coming first, they can fork over the money for the honeymoon.

NefariousnessFresh24 −  NTA – family comes first, and that family is your girlfriend, the one you chose, not the one you were born with. If your sister feels that your girlfriend should be excluded, then you have no obligations towards her at all. F**k her (not literally though, because ewww)

PoopocalypseNow_ −  Your mistake was offering to pay for the honeymoon. The road to hell is paved with good intentions.

HorrorLover___ −  You and your girlfriend should go on the holiday instead.

zoville −  Girlfriend of five years? Yet you commented on a post yesterday about sleeping with a married woman three years ago. And it was a post asking single men.

MuttFett −  How is this a recurring theme? And how do you people keep falling for it?