AITAH for refusing to pay for my cousin’s car repairs after she borrowed my car and crashed it?

A Redditor shared a frustrating situation where they lent their car to a cousin who crashed it while texting. When asked to take responsibility for the repairs, the cousin refused, claiming she couldn’t afford it and suggesting the owner file an insurance claim instead. Now, family tensions are rising, leaving the Redditor questioning if they’re being unreasonable. Read the full story below and weigh in!

‘ AITAH for refusing to pay for my cousin’s car repairs after she borrowed my car and crashed it?’

Today, my cousin asked to borrow my car because hers was in the shop, and she needed to run some errands. I hesitated at first but eventually agreed, thinking it was just for a few hours and nothing could go wrong.

A few hours later, I got a call from her, panicked and in tears. She had rear-ended another car at a stoplight, and my car was pretty badly damaged. Thankfully, no one was hurt, but the front bumper and hood were smashed.
When I got to the scene, she admitted she was texting while driving. I was upset but tried to stay calm since we were in public and I didn’t want to make things worse.

Now comes the issue: I expected her to take responsibility for the repairs since she was at fault. However, when I brought it up, she said she didn’t have the money and told me to claim it on my insurance instead. The problem is, my deductible is pretty high, and filing a claim will increase my premiums. I explained this to her, but she insisted she couldn’t afford it and said it was on me because I had agreed to lend her the car.

She then said I was being unreasonable and that family should always help each other. I told her that borrowing a car comes with the basic responsibility of driving safely, and texting while driving was 100% on her.

Things escalated when other family members got involved. Some are telling me I should just let it go and pay for the repairs to avoid conflict, while others agree that she’s at fault and should figure out how to handle the expenses.
Now I’m stuck in the middle, with my car still damaged and no resolution in sight. So, AITAH for standing my ground and expecting her to take responsibility?

Let’s dive into the reactions from Reddit:

InevitableYouth9743 −  Absolutely not. She borrowed your car, *chose* to text and crash it, and now expects you to pay? That’s entitlement on steroids. Next time, tell her to borrow some common sense instead.

RantyMcThrowaway −  NTA. Womp womp. If she didn’t have the money she shouldn’t have texted while driving. She endangered herself and everyone else on the road. Work out a payment plan with her if possible.

NagaApi8888 −  NTAH. First get it in writing that she was texting whilst driving. Be clever about how you trick her into admitting it. Second, tell her she pays or you go to police and small claims court. Third, tell those saying to keep the peace that you are gratefully accepting their contributions to paying for the repairs so that they can help keep the peace.

Beginning-Sample-824 −  NTA. You learned an important and expensive lesson. Don’t let nobody, and I mean nobody, drive yo s**t. As for the money, tell the cousins, aunties , and the rest of the fools who think you should let it go to pass the collection plate and cough up some of their hard earned money.. You know what you gonna hear?. Crickets. From here on out, if someone wants a car, they better go to enterprise… they’ll pick you up.

NefariousnessFresh24 −  NTA – she is trying to play the family card in order to stick you with the cost of her mistake. You helped her in the way family should, by letting her borrow your car. Then she decided to text and drive, and she has to take responsibility for that.

What if she had hit a child while texting? Would that also be on you, because you agreed to let her borrow the car? All those people who tell you to let it go in order to avoid conflict can feel free to chip in and help her pay your costs… after all, family should help each other, right?

WealthOk9637 −  See if her insurance will cover the cost. When I was debating whether to add someone who was an occasional driver to my policy, my insurance company said it wasn’t necessary because if the other driver had insurance any claims on my vehicle could be made through their policy. Check if that is true, that’s what I was told.

Other than that, yeah your cousin sucks, but ultimately you are responsible for your vehicle and who you choose to lend it to. Do not lend it to anyone without thinking what will happen if there is an accident.

redditreaderwolf −  NTA, tell her to pay up or you’ll have to inform the police that she was texting and driving.

Chef_BoyarTom −  NTA. “Family should always help each other”. You did, by lending her your car. Now she needs to help *you* by paying for the damage she caused with her negligence. Simple as that. And those telling you to “let it go and pay for it yourself to avoid conflict” can just shut up. They’re acting like this is no big deal and she broke something inconsequential when she *crashed your f**king car*.

This situation was of her own making and she’ll never learn *any* kind of proper responsibility if you let her get away with it. You may consider negotiating some kind of payment plan… but absolutely DO NOT let her get away without paying for it.

Blueridgetoblueocean −  Give your insurance her name. Her name will be on the accident report. Have your insurance reach out to her insurance. Then you aren’t involved.

ScarThoryn −  NTA, she should own up. Maybe see if her insurance can cover it.