AITAH for not allowing our son to visit my in laws anymore because they don’t feed him real food?

A Reddit user decided to stop allowing her 5-year-old son to visit his grandparents after repeated instances of them feeding him only sugary treats instead of proper meals. Despite both her and her husband explicitly asking them to provide a real dinner, they ignored the request again, giving the child only hot chocolate and a Kit Kat. The user feels frustrated by their disregard, while her husband thinks she’s overreacting. Is she wrong for drawing the line? Read the full story below to decide.

‘ AITAH for not allowing our son to visit my in laws anymore because they don’t feed him real food?’

Our son is 5.5. The last 4 times he has spent time with my husbands parents they only give him treats and I’m sick and tired of it. One time all they gave him all day was a cinnamon roll and hot chocolate. Another time it was ice cream and a donut.

Now today they asked to pick him up from school and take him to a movie, I agreed but said to please feed him beforehand as when they would be getting home would be well past dinner and bedtime.

Husband also called his dad and told him the same thing on the phone. Son gets home and asks me what’s for dinner, I’m like what didn’t you eat, he says well I had hot chocolate and Kit Kat. I told my husband I am so done and that is their last time because they do not listen at all. He said I’m being an a hole and it’s not a big deal. Am I wrong?

Edit: when we have asked her why she isn’t feeding him real food her response is that she likes to spoil him, I think she thinks she’s being nice to him or something by just giving him a bunch of treats.

Here’s the input from the Reddit crowd:

ElegantXIsabelle −  It’s reasonable to expect your in-laws to provide your son with proper meals, not just treats. NTA.

Vegoia2 −  Is this what they fed your husband as a kid? it’s weird for sure.

I_might_be_weasel −  NTA. I can’t see why they are both starving him and also feeding him junk food. You’d think one or the other would be the issue. So that’s extra bad.

Character-Dinner7123 −  Husband doesn’t have a problem with it ? Don’t allow him any food until kid gets home.

CollywobblesMumma −  NTA. They are literally denying him sufficient food and only giving him unhealthy snacks. I don’t know if this is an absolute hill to die on but there needs to be some consequences for them repeatedly disrespecting and disregarding the parent’s wishes.

EvoletRose −  NTA. It’s totally reasonable to expect your son to eat actual meals instead of a sugar fest. If the grandparents can’t follow basic instructions to ensure he’s getting proper nutrition, it makes sense to put a pause on visits. Maybe they think they’re in the running for the ‘Cool Grandparent’ award, but part of loving him is making sure he doesn’t live off candy and treats. You’re just looking out for your kiddo’s health!

Con4America −  NTA. Tell your husband that from now on he gets to eat ONLY what his son eats at his parents’ house since he thinks it isn’t a big deal. Invite them over for dinner and offer them the same thing they offered your son. Two can play at being petty.

You can also ask them if they are on food stamps or just broke since they never feed their grandkid real food. Embarrass them for this. that poor kid is hungry when he gets home.

Educational_Gas_92 −  NTA. They should at least feed him sandwiches, spaghetti or similar, giving him only a donut and chocolate isn’t acceptable, however I’m also surprised that the child doesn’t complain of hunger. When I read the title, I assumed they fed him pizza, burgers, fries and the like, which would be a bad diet if followed daily, but occasionally as a treat is no big deal.

However, how can they think a cinnamon roll and hot chocolate constitutes enough of a meal for a small child? You have to explain to them, you expect them to provide more acceptable food for your child.

lapsteelguitar −  Stand your ground. Also, you have a hubby problem. Was he raised the same way?. NTA.

TCTX73 −  Even a Happy Meal would be more substantial. Your husband needs to put his foot down with his parents. Treats are fine, but feed the kid a meal or don’t take him for extended time. Sheesh.