AITAH for not allowing my sister use my vacation home?

Family disputes over property can be especially heated when old sibling dynamics resurface. In this update, a 52-year-old man explains why he refused his entitled younger sister’s request to use his California beach house as a vacation home. Given their rocky relationship and her longstanding messy habits, he felt justified in denying her request—even if it meant risking further family strife.
‘AITAH for not allowing my sister use my vacation home?’
When it comes to setting boundaries with family, particularly regarding valuable property, it is crucial to balance familial obligations with personal well-being. Dr. Laura Markham, a psychologist specializing in family dynamics, explains, “A sibling is not automatically entitled to use someone else’s property, especially when there is a history of problematic behavior that could lead to further issues.”
In this situation, the narrator’s decision to deny his sister access to his vacation home is supported by his need to protect his investment and maintain a harmonious household. While some might argue that family should help one another, Dr. Markham notes that “helping family does not mean sacrificing personal peace or financial stability, especially when there is a well-documented pattern of irresponsibility.” His choice to block her call and messages, though harsh to some, reflects the need to uphold healthy boundaries and prevent ongoing conflict.
Heres the input from the Reddit crowd:
Many redditors support the narrator, arguing that his sister’s entitlement and messiness justify his refusal to lend her the beach house, and that family members are not automatically owed access to personal property. They applaud him for protecting his investment and maintaining boundaries.
On the other hand, some feel that as family, a bit of generosity might have softened old wounds, even if it meant temporary inconvenience. Overall, the discussion centers on balancing familial obligations with the right to protect one’s personal space and financial interests.
In conclusion, the narrator’s decision to refuse his sister’s request to use his vacation home is rooted in a long history of problematic behavior and the need to safeguard his hard-earned success. While many understand his stance, others question whether a little family compromise might have been possible.
What do you think—was he justified in setting these boundaries, or should he have found a way to help her despite their history? Share your thoughts, experiences, and advice below to help us explore the fine line between family loyalty and personal responsibility.